The TSA Took My Contra Band Away Now!

The TSA Took My Contra Band Away Now!

It's the most wonderful time of the year... Yes, it's the busiest time of year at airports as people travel to hang out with relatives and get stuffed off Turkey. It really is the busiest times for airports, so that's why I take great joy in the fact that so many people are pissed off towards this whole TSA business. Just take a look at this poll

Reuters' readers were asked whether or not they would change their travel plans to avoid the invasive scans and pat-downs, and a whopping 96 percent (65,708 of 68,513) have thus far said yes.

What do you think about about the new invasive airport security screenings and all the hoopla surrounding them?

* Stop complaining! The new measures are necessary to guarantee security.
10%
* They may go too far, but are okay so long as people are given the option to opt out.
7%
* Enough with the scans and pat-downs! They're an invasion of civil liberties.
80%
* I'm not sure. Maybe I'll feel stronger after my next flight.
3%

I have to admit that my faith in my fellow Americans has been slightly improved upon after reading that. Good for them. Fuck the TSA.

I will refuse a body-scan out of principle. Not out of insecurity. I know it's hard, but try to put yourself in someone else's shoes please. A parent who doesn't want their 5-year old son/daughter to be either ogled or groped. A 16-year old girl who doesn't want middle-aged men making comments about her tits in a back room. A muslim woman who's religion preaches modesty which she now can't have. A pregnant woman who doesn't want to be subjected to poorly understood forms of ionizing radiation. The one guy in fifty million who actually develops cancer because of these machines. And yes, even the guy with crippling social anxiety and a tiny penis.

I don't particularly care if someone laughs at my dick. But there are plenty of reasons people do care about these new 'security' measures. I mean, look at the following picture. Does this person look like much of a threat?



Looking at those uniforms, it's pretty similar to an actual police officers, I'm sure that's on purpose. It's suppose to trigger a subconscious response to submit to whatever they are telling you to do.

It should be mentioned that you can visit any government building in the United States, up to and including the White House, where you may get a chance to speak with the President, and no one will stick a pen down your pants as shown in that picture.

I realize that a lot of dumb people fly and I'm sure TSA workers can get very annoyed at the fact that they deal with so many moronic people every day, but they should look at themselves in the mirror. Is the paycheck worth it?

Even if there's a lot of bad fliers, it can be easily explained by a lack of experience using the method of travel and general exhaustion that flying actually has on a person. You have to admit that airports and security check points in general are overwhelming and intimidating if you don't have to got through them normally.


Yup, back of the hand alright... then again, I don't blame her..

You have workers who are barking commands at you and treating you like you're a terrorist and all of a sudden it becomes a situation of US vs THEM. The whole notion that you're guilty till proven innocent.

Why can't the TSA officer involved in all this and doing this for a living take into account that the average flier only gets on a plane and has to go through this process once or twice every couple of years.

Then you have those who are coming back or going to a destination like a vacation. By the time you get to the airport it's usually when you're really exhausted from your long trip and can easily get confused. What you need is some rest and not to be treated like a criminal attempting to take down a plane.

I know I flew a lot during the post 9/11 world and I can tell you that even with my massive amount of miles, it has happened to me many times. So just blaming the public for being ignorant and stupid seems like it's shortsighted and not really much of a solution.

Besides that, I've said it before and I'll say it again, what does this security theater really do for your safety? If it was actually helpful wouldn't you see this force implemented in other places. What will the government do if there was some terrorist attack in a crowded subway car or in the ports, which are all poorly secured.


Looks like you're smuggling something here, sir.

TSA is a perfect example of the old "protecting you from yesterday's threats tomorrow" type of bureaucracy, so I'd pretty much exclude everyone. It's all bullshit anyway. As Bruce Schneier said back in 2005:

Exactly two things have made airline travel safer since 9/11: reinforcement of cockpit doors, and passengers who now know that they may have to fight back. Everything else -- Secure Flight and Trusted Traveler included -- is security theater. We would all be a lot safer if, instead, we implemented enhanced baggage security -- both ensuring that a passenger's bags don't fly unless he does, and explosives screening for all baggage -- as well as background checks and increased screening for airport employees.

Then we could take all the money we save and apply it to intelligence, investigation and emergency response. These are security measures that pay dividends regardless of what the terrorists are planning next, whether it's the movie plot threat of the moment, or something entirely different.

I mean, it's become a daily occurrence to spot the next epic TSA fuckup. Just look at this next situation..

A woman tries to have containers of breast milk she's carrying hand-screened instead of passed through the x-ray machine. Breast milk is considered a medical liquid under the TSA's own regulations, which means she has a perfect right to make this request, and the TSA, again by its own stated rules, will comply.

What happens instead is that she's scolded by the TSA, left standing in the clear "special screening" cubicle for over an hour until she misses her flight, and has a real police officer called over to tell her that she is being a disruptive passenger.

Eventually a supervisor is called over. The woman shows him a copy of the TSA's guidelines, printed out from their own website and brought with her, as the TSA itself suggests. The response? According to her, the supervisor tells her, "Well, the rules don't apply to you today."

According to the woman the TSA was rude and verbally abusive to her, but the security camera footage has no sound. However, the TSA hasn't denied her version of events, and even if you can't hear what's being said, the video (in four parts, all taken from the TSA's own cameras) is pretty damning with just what you see of the interaction.

In all honestly, the real power of the TSA is the ability to make people miss their flights. No matter how well you follow the rules, they can make up some stupid reason to keep you there for an extra half hour and then whoops! Sorry about that.. oh wait, not even a sorry.



And since they've been getting so much bad press, they decided to not include 12 year old and under kids into the whole scanners, but now it's Pilots who finally get the pass.

Which is smart because, let's fucking be honest here.. Given the amount of radiation pilots are exposed to on a yearly basis just flying, I can't really imagine why they would opt in to going through more machines that send radiation bouncing off their bodies. Also, they're the goddamn pilot. If they wanted to take down a plane, they don't need to sneak in a bomb. They could just crash it.

I have an idea that these machines really don't have much to do with the War on Terror and is instead sounding like a move for the war on drugs. Liquids, gels and powders either don't make good explosives or require a detonator to go off. However, these substances do describe all commonly smuggled drugs. And what better mule to carry drugs than an pilot.


They should be checking Kim K.'s ass, as that would be the place she would smuggle midgets in with.

The worse of it is that no one is even paying attention to who gets the money in all this. The machines cost somewhere around $100,000 each and they plan on selling 500 this quarter and another 1000 the next quarter. Which means that the former director of the TSA gets his paycheck.

Our nations security, dignity, and time is being sold on a lie because there is a buck in it. Not like Micheal Chertoff, the former director who is cashing in on all this with his company who makes the machine ever has to fly commercial anyway. So he wouldn't know what it would feel like to be treated like a terrorist.

Michael Chertoff's "Chertoff Group" which he has admitted owning RapidScan Systems, one of the two manufacturers of the of the full-body scanners, simply wants to take millions of dollars of your tax money while simultaneously convincing you that it's for your safety.


Turn and cough please.

I mean, it's really obviously a money-making scheme for those with stock involved here. It's actually pretty awful that if this was a movie we'd all be bitching about how unrealistic it is because the plan is so fucking obvious. And yet this point is ignored because it's not as visceral or easy to relate to as the TSA getting their grope on.


There really isn't any point to any of it anyway. It prevents nothing. In fact, the one thing we've done since 9/11 that actually would have prevented 9/11 was reinforcing and locking the cockpit door, everything else is completely reactionary. It's better to gut the TSA to 1/8th its current budget and go back to metal detectors and employ air marshals to fly on each plane and call it a day.

Grabbing a kids junk isn't going to find the bomb someone made him swallow or otherwise jammed inside of him. So, yeah, the threat level remains the same. Firing the junk grabbers on the other hand, at least gives us infrastructure budget to be used in a more helpful manner.


....

And it's not even a case of bad screeners either. You can't just say to fire them for going against the TSA policy because.. at the current moment TSA has no policy. They pull it out of their ass as they go along. No one knows what the rules are. We're directed to the website, when the website doesn't say what the screener says, we're told that it's all part of "dynamic security" so that the terrorist don't exploit a weakness. In short, you're just making the fucking rules up as we're playing the game.

You have a bunch of people who don't know their polices and apply them so inconsistently, then they wonder why people get pissed off. Like in the situation where a cancer survivor had to remove her fake breast in public. Only that's not what the policy states to do.

I also love it when people start quoting shit like in this article..

But John Drake, 36, of York, Maine, flying yesterday with his family to San Jose, Calif., for Thanksgiving, had no complaints: “Travel is not a birth-given right. It’s a choice. And it’s up to our government to make sure we’re safe while we do it.” He called Opt Out Day “the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard of.”

Shut the motherfucking fuck up. Traveling is not a birth-given right? We should have to check in with the police station for permission before we leave our hometowns, and notify the police in te cities we visit when we arrive. Just like a good totalitarian state, I say. The government knows what's best for us!

It's bad enough they're making outrageous shit for not following their strict rules.

The Transportation Security Administration (TSA) is warning that any would-be commercial airline passenger who enters an airport checkpoint and then refuses to undergo the method of inspection designated by TSA will not be allowed to fly and also will not be permitted to simply leave the airport.

That person will have to remain on the premises to be questioned by the TSA and possibly by local law enforcement. Anyone refusing faces fines up to $11,000 and possible arrest.

They've implemented that right now. Why? it's purely punitive measure, made in response to the constant public outrage of last week and because it's the Holiday travel rush. It's the TSA saying, in clear terms, "You are the enemy, and we are the authority".


Yeah.. she's not hiding anything there...

Even if we have this little Fourth Amendment in our Constitution...

The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

Yup, it sounds pretty cut and dry.

And it's not that they can save your image. I mean, that is terrible, but the fact that when they asked them if they could save the image, the TSA flat out lied about it. So it brings into question what else they are lying about.

But the worse part of this whole situation is that Michael Chertoff, the guy at the DHS who pushed hard for these scanners, is financially connected to the company that makes them. And that they're being crammed down our throats. Someone's making a huge amount of money off irradiating us under the impression that it makes us safer.

Of course, they'll just flat out deny that there was any conflict of interest, but yes it's absolutely disgusting that not only are people's rights being trampled, it's likely being implemented so one of the executives can make a nice gain.

I bet that the terrorist are so pleased with how hysterical we've all become. I'm confused by how people forget that the point of terrorism is to create a heightened state of anxiety and fear in the culture targeted, but yet somehow don't see that this is sort of intense violating reaction in order to protect us.

But hey, maybe if they make bladder problem people pee, they're doing something to stop terrorism.

A Houghton Lake man says he was so aggressively patted down by an agent at a Detroit Metro Airport security checkpoint this month that it caused the lid on his urostomy bag to come loose, spilling urine on his shirt and pants.. . .


Sawyer said he and his wife were heading to catch a plane to Orlando on Nov. 7 when he went through the airport’s new full-body scanner and was then selected to be patted down by a TSA agent.

Sawyer said that after asking the agents for a more discreet pat-down, he was taken to a private area.

Sawyer said one agent began the pat-down, but when he began sliding his hand firmly down his chest, he said he told the security officer that the pressure could pull the lid off his urostomy bag — which, Sawyer said, is what happened.

“When I got out of the room my wife knew something was wrong and I just broke down crying,” he said. “I was just so embarrassed, so humiliated.”

He said once through security, he changed his bag, but didn’t have time to change his clothing and had to board the plane soaked in urine.

“I was embarrassed to death,” Sawyer said.

He said he was diagnosed with bladder cancer in 2007 and had to have a procedure that left him with a urostomy bag to catch re-routed urine. . .

Still, Sawyer said it didn’t ruin his trip with his wife.

“Nothing,” he said, “absolutely nothing, ruins our good time.”

I have to say, "I'm just doing my job" has never been an acceptable excuse for anything. I'm not sure why people think that doing bad things is okay if you're doing it for money.

It's also a bit comical. Looking up what you can bring on the plane, I noticed that you can bring your knitting needles as carry on, but not a nail clipper... I just have to wonder how that makes any sense. I mean, yeah, everyone should know that it is possible to blow up a plane or take over it with nail clippers, but with Knitting needles you're not going to do anything but make a neat Doctor Who scarf.



As for the comment from the TSA administrator John Pistole:

...it comes down to how do we give the highest level of confidence to everybody on that flight that everybody else has been properly screened

Not the highest level of safety, but the highest level of passenger confidence. Security theater has been directly unmasked by the TSA.

I mean, how else do you force everyone to go through their incredibly dangerous and expensive machines while punishing the ones who would argue with it to ensure their contract stays as strong as it does? You grab their junk and say that there's potentially a risk of a bomb being kept in an area they value more than anything else. If that doesn't work they'll just start doing wrist deep anal searches.

I have to ask why everyone assumes that people are asking for more security and a better feeling of safety... Who the fuck is asking for more security? Does "people" mean the people who are making money from the TSA? Because the average traveler is much more nervous about something happening with the plane itself, or with the fact that they'll be defying gravity in a few moments and flying. They're less afraid of terrorist because.. the amount of terrorist attacks is fucking small!


Buy a man dinner first before you touch my mini anaconda, nigga!

Unless we get another underwear/shoe/mustache/anal cavity bomber this holiday season, the TSA will probably be under significant pressure to change their practices. Hell, and even if we do, they'll be shown as the king with no clothing that they are.

There's a point where you put too much security and you hit some sort of safety diminishing returns somewhere past taking off shoes and a little before body scans and groping. And I have to say, the shoe threat was stupid. The guy was trying to light C-4 with a lighter. C-4 doesn't explode from just applying fire to it, it'll burn, but that's about it.

We are so far past that diminishing returns point that it's not even funny. The TSA is only continuing to get funding by employing terror techniques to scare the average American into giving them more money to ensure their safety. That's right. How ironic is that shit, the TSA is a terrorist organization and while we fight this war on terror we created one to terrorize our own population. Isn't it about time that we see the TSA as useful as putting up a sign that says "Please don't attack us"

So of course the TSA is digging in their heels on this one, because the makers of the device spent 4.3 million this year paying off the government for the right to put these into place. There's nothing that makes officials fight tooth and nail more than the prospect of losing lobbyist money. Yes, corruption happens. A lot.

Holiday Travels Means You're Gonna Get Molested

Holiday Travels Means You're Gonna Get Molested

Ah, the holiday season is here and with only a week till Turkey day, you're probably going to be facing the unfortunate situation of going to the airport. Forget the long lines and the hassle of finding your luggage. There's a new threat in town and that's the TSA itself.

The TSA is currently under a lot of pressure right now from right wing blogs, news outlets, and public opinion after a decade of being created post 9/11 and it's only because of one reason that it's getting shit on right now.. Because a lot of WHITE people are getting harassed.

Like this half way decent looking girl who was sent to the full-body scanner, cuffed up, and received a pat-down.



Which she goes on to assume it's because the TSA wanted to pat down some attractive female to feel up. But that's not the only case, there's this other situation in San Diego where a dude was not having another dude touch his junk or someone was gonna get arrested.

Los Angeles, California (CNN) -- In response to a video of a California man's dispute with airport security officials, the Transportation Security Administration said Monday it tries to be sensitive to individuals, but everyone getting on a flight must be screened.

The video, in which software engineer John Tyner refuses an X-ray scan at the San Diego, California, airport, has sparked a debate over screening procedures.

Tyner told CNN on Sunday that he was surprised to see so many people take an interest in his refusal and the dispute with airport screeners that followed it. But he said he hoped the video will focus attention on what he calls a government invasion of privacy.

"Obviously, everybody has their own perspective about their personal screening," TSA administrator John Pistole told CNN. "The question is, how do we best address those issues ... while providing the best possible security?"

Tyner, 31, said his hunting trip to South Dakota was cut short before it even started Saturday morning -- when TSA agents asked him to go through an X-ray machine.

"I don't think that the government has any business seeing me naked as a condition of traveling about the country," Tyner said.

Pistole said the agency is "trying to be sensitive to individuals issues and concerns," but added, "the bottom line is, everybody who gets on that flight has been properly screened."

The cell phone video Tyner recorded of his arguments with security screeners over the scan and pat-down they proposed had garnered more than 80,000 hits on YouTube by early Monday morning.

Tyner said that after he declined the body scan, a TSA agent told him he could have a pat-down instead. Once the procedure was described, Tyner said he responded, "If you touch my junk, I'll have you arrested."

The dispute that followed, Tyner said, included police escorting him from the screening area and a supervisor saying he could face a civil lawsuit for leaving the airport before security had finished screening him.

"The whole thing just seemed ridiculous. ... I don't intend to fly until these machines go away," he said.

"Advanced imaging technology screening is optional for all passengers," TSA said in a statement released Monday. "Passengers who opt out of [advanced imaging] screening will receive alternative screening, including a physical pat-down."

But anyone who refuses to complete the screening process will be denied access to airport secure areas and could be subject to civil penalties, the administration said, citing a federal appeals court ruling in support of the rule.

The ruling, from the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals, says that "requiring that a potential passenger be allowed to revoke consent to an ongoing airport security search makes little sense in a post-9/11 world. Such a rule would afford terrorists multiple opportunities to attempt to penetrate airport security by 'electing not to fly' on the cusp of detection until a vulnerable portal is found."

The TSA's advanced imaging technology machines use two separate means of creating images of passengers -- backscatter X-ray technology and millimeter-wave technology.

At the end of October, 189 backscatter units and 152 millimeter-wave machines were in use in more than 65 airports. The total number of imaging machines is expected to be near 1,000 by the end of 2011, according to the TSA.

The agency has previously said that the new technology is safe and protects passenger privacy.

"Strict privacy safeguards are built into the foundation of TSA's use of advanced imaging technology to protect passenger privacy and ensure anonymity," the agency says in a statement on its website.

Images from the scans cannot be saved or printed, according to the agency. Facial features are blurred. And agents who directly interact with passengers do not see the scans.

But Tyner isn't the only one with concerns about the new security procedures.

Grass-roots groups are urging travelers either not to fly or to protest by opting out of the full-body scanners and undergoing time-consuming pat-downs instead.

Industry leaders are worried about the backlash. Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano met with leaders of travel industry groups to discuss the concerns.

"We certainly understand the challenges that DHS confronts, but the question remains, where do we draw the line? Our country desperately needs a long-term vision for aviation security screening, rather than an endless reaction to yesterday's threat," the U.S. Travel Association said in a statement after the meeting. "At the same time, fundamental American values must be protected."

I don't know about the rest of you people, but I specifically ask the TSA to pat me down when I go through airport security because it's probably one of the only times I can legally feel intimacy with another human being without giving up a C-note and risk getting busted by the po-po.

So what's the big deal and why are groups so against it? Well, let's break it down...

The Pilot unions are upset because these kids of repeated X-ray scans might cause cataracts in the relatively short term.

Anti-Corruption people are up in arms because the machines were only deemed necessary, then purchased due to backroom deals with Chertoff's company, the one that makes the machines. (What a coincidence that security forces around the world consider these machines to be a waste of money!)

Civil Libertarians are up in arms because now they have to choose between nude photographs being taken of them or having their genitals fondled by security agents.

Parents are up in arms because their children are being fondled by security agents.

Right wingers are up in arms because Muslim women are able to request that only their head and neck area be given an "enhanced patdown" as that is the only area that can't be accurately visualized during some scans.

Security experts are at least frustrated because this kind of machine wouldn't have foiled the underwear bomber, the shoe bomber, the made-up "liquid explosives" plot, or 9/11. Though part of me likes the fact that this is scaring parents away from potentially getting their kids fondled at the airport for one simple reason. It would mean a lot less children on airplanes. Let's work on getting the religious nuts out of the way as well..

I also have to wonder who these parents are that are up in arms about a TSA agent touching their kid, but they're A-okay with having the same kid's dick chopped. I guess folks can have different stances on the issue of their kids junk.


Oh no! Not a nun! Why would the terrorist assume a different religion to blow up a plane?!

You know what I don't get, why do they even search pilots? Let's be real for a minute here.. if one of them is a terrorist hell bent to take this plane down in a blaze of glory, I have some bad news for you TSA workers, not finding a bomb on him isn't going to prevent him from simply turning the wheel straight for a building.

Many of you may not think that an outline of your body is violating your rights but think again. Just look at those images. You could pretty easily see a person's genitalia on the pictures as well as evidence of any major surgery and a lot of medical conditions. And answer me this one, if these weren't intrusive then why did two TSA workers get into a fist fight after one mocked the others small penis after they went through one of the scanners?

I also don't see how bombarding someone with ionizing radiation that can be carcinogenic and then telling them that the health risks are minimal isn't a violation of your civil liberties. To be honest, I'd rather taking the groping over being blasted with X-rays any day of the week.

While it seems that everyone is up in arms about this, should I point out that this is not new at all? The only reason people are getting mad about it is because it is no longer limited to some dude named Abdul who looks like a bomber and they realize that they're in the same class as this once easy terrorist scapegoat.

All of this shit does nothing to prevent terrorist attacks that are already exceedingly rare.



Maybe some of you are also worried about the wrong thing. What about having your bags swabbed for drugs or explosives. I mean, who keeps explosives on the outside of your bag for any amount of time? If anything, I know a lot of people who have spent enough time around weed that any article of clothing or piece of cloth that ever was in their place is now fused with weed smoke on the molecular level.

If your job requires a lot of flying and needs you to have good eyesight, then I would suggest you not go through the machines because they will fuck you up. Or maybe this is just the government's way of telling Americans that they are fat and need to lose a couple of pounds. By, you know, making them choose to bike to their destination instead of fly to it.

While we're on the subject here, we're all missing the bigger picture, which I would think is the more important one.... what does this do for actual plane safety? If you're going through these machines for the sake of being an amateur porn star, sure. By all means go for it. But if you're willing to trade that little ounce of liberty in exchange for safety, I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this but it adds nothing to that.

If you think that the TSA actually does anything to make your flight any safer than you are a delusional moron. Whenever there's a slow news cycle the local news always falls back to the classic time tested attempt at ratings by sneaking in knives on board a plane only to never get caught. When was the last time the TSA caught anyone.. any fucking one with a gun or C4 or some other malicious attempt to destroy the plane? I don't recall anyone saying "Oh, thank god we have the TSA to protect us!"

All a terrorist has to do is smuggle a bomb in their ass hole and after opting out of the body scan and passing the enhanced grope pat down, blow their asshole to kingdom come on the plane. Then we'll really lose all our civil liberties and full cavity searches will be a mandatory hassle to deal with when flying.



Let's just throw it out there.. How much money are we giving Chertoff for the ability to use these fucking ridiculous X-ray machines? It seems like it would be a whole lot less invasive and more cost effective to just put guards on all flights or just pat down everyone coming in like they do at most heavy metal concerts. But no, let's just throw more money at this silly X-ray machine company.

If you can deal with the phrase "Porno Scanners" being repeated over and over, this is a pretty decent article on the time line showing how the scanners are just another defense contractor looting of the budget.

# 2005: Michael Chertoff, as head of Homeland Security, orders the first batch of porno scanners from a company called Rapiscan Systems. After his departure, Chertoff gave dozens of interviews using his government credentials to promote the device. What he didn't tell people was that Rapiscan was one of the clients of his consulting company, The Chertoff group.

# March 2009: The Department of Homeland Security says they will apply $1 billion in stimulus money to the nation's airports. Senator Joe Lieberman, Chairman of the Senate Homeland Security Committee, personally promises to oversee the distribution of stimulus funds so money goes toward the goal of creating "4 million jobs" and not on "boondoggles"

# December 2009: Utah Rep. Jason Chaffetz inserted language into the Homeland Security appropriations bill barring the use of fully-body image scans as "primary" screening tools at airports, and it passed the House on a bipartisan vote of 310-118. Both the ACLU and the NRA backed it. The amendment also made it illegal to store and copy these images. It died in the Senate.

# December 25, 2009: The "Christmas bomber" attempts to detonate plastic explosives hidden in his underwear while on board a flight to Detroit.

# December 29, 2009: Joe Lieberman calls for "more widespread use of the full-body scanners after the aborted attack."

# January 2009: Since they couldn't get money for the porno scanners from Congress, TSA uses the "Christmas bomber" scare to appropriate $25 million they had received in stimulus money to buy the "backscatter" scanners -- from Rapiscan, Chertoff's client. Rapiscan said the contract "helped create" 25 jobs. The government has gives the TSA the green light to spend a total of $173 million on the scanners. TSA spokesperson Sarah Horowitz said "the agency has enough funds that would come from the stimulus program and other federal sources" to purchase 300 more porno scanners, per CNN. Total jobs created, per the government's own website: 1.

# April 2010: The GAO reports that "it remains unclear whether the AIT would have detected the weapon used in the December 2009 incident based on the preliminary information GAO has received."

# November 8, 2010: US Airline Pilots Association tells its members "NOT to submit to AIT screenings."

# November 15, 2010: Joe Lieberman says he "comes down on the side of the

And while the phrase is so fucking awful, I dare say even worse than "Death Tax" or "Death Panels", the article does ring true on all this shit. We're just trading away our money for this idea that we can somehow be safe in our risky... even if this isn't risky in comparison, practices of daily life.

I really don't care about the pat-downs, but that's because I'm a guy and as stated before, if someone's going to willingly touch me, who am I to complain. But take an image of my naked self to show off to the other employees and I got a problem with that.

Did you know that you can still bring in unlimited amounts of homeopathic medicine in any form, be it liquid, solid, gel or aerosol? Security wont even stop you. This also can be the equipment for this bullshit science. Documentation of said medication is recommended, but not required. So hey, terrorist. That's a new avenue you can go through for your greater good..

The scanners don't increase security.. and that's what I'm more frustrated about. That all this shit is done in the name of your safety and all it's doing is potentially creating health risks for you every time you walk through one. The whole thing subjects you through a gross invasion of privacy that wouldn't be allowed under any other circumstance except if you were being arrested for a felony.

And even then, the cops don't take nude pictures of you unless they have a specific reason, such as rape. Let alone the whole idea that this is just wasting millions of dollars. You shouldn't have to worry about getting molested or seen naked just because you want to fly somewhere.. and in many situations it's really the only reasonable method of travel in getting somewhere.

I think we all know the real reason why Americans are afraid of being patted down. What if they get turned on by a same sex TSA worker touching them? Oh no, then it would be time to question one's sexuality So even if the groping was more acceptable, it would still raise questions. Such as the classic idea of what if a gay man was allowed to feel up your genitals.

Should Gay TSA Agents be Barred from Giving 'Same-gender Pat-downs'

CHICAGO, Nov. 16 /Christian Newswire/ -- Americans For Truth About Homosexuality (AFTAH) today questioned the propriety of "same-gender' TSA (Transportation Security Administration) "pat-downs" -- if the TSA agents doing the 'patting down" are homosexual, lesbian or bisexual.

Homeland Security Sec. Janet Napolitano went out of her way yesterday to stress that the TSA pat-downs are "same-gender" -- mostly to reassure women that men will not be groping them at airports in the name of safety.

"But what about homosexual TSA agents?" AFTAH President Peter LaBarbera responded. "Isn't it just as inappropriate for a 'gay' male TSA agent to pat down male travelers as it is for a normal, heterosexual male TSA agent to pat down female travelers?

The solution is pretty clear, we should only hire attractive people of both sexes as TSA agents and let the passenger pick the agent who they find attractive and acceptable to molest them in a vain attempt to keep some illusion of safety in the airport.

In fact, if they said "Here are the people free to grope you, pick one" I'd be happier with the whole experience. Even if it didn't matter, because let's be real - how much different is it than just being assigned a random screener? All it does is make you believe you have some pretend choice on the matter. Now that's a false sense of control that I can get behind. Mainly because it doesn't blow smoke up my ass on falsely making me feel safe.

What Will You Do For Your Safety?

What Will You Do For Your Safety?

If you haven't heard by now, some kid from Nigeria tried to blow up an airplane on Christmas day using bombs that he sneaked onto the plane in his underwear. This caused a lot of concern because he was able to get past that much talked about TSA security that I have hated since I first started doing a lot of traveling for work back in 2001.

It was a bit of a bad timing for me. I just got a gig that required me to fly around and do location shoots, which would have me away for weeks at a time, but worse of all, I had to first really start flying after 9/11 and the levels of security were just annoying. I knew the risk, I was more than happy to take them. Hell, chances were that they just did an attack via planes, why would they do it again so soon?



In any case, I really hated TSA. I'm sure you're going to tell me that they're keeping the air safe for travelers. I disagree. Their tactics are nothing more than Security Theater. In that it's security countermeasures that are intended to provide the feeling of improved security while doing little to nothing to actually improve security.

I suppose for many the feeling of safety is actually more important than being safe. That's why we're in the fear based society we are in today. Because the only thing you really need to control the people is fear. So with that in mind, there's a new method to try to weed out the potential problems on a flight.. futuristic x-ray machines. Stuff that will see past your cloths and will only stop with your skin...



I just have one thing to say; I'm a grower not a shower, it's such bullshit having to explain that to security every time I go to an airport. Or having them look at me odd when I go into this super x-ray machine with a stiffy. I mean, maybe they'll feel like there's some sort of awkwardness to be felt between the two of us. I'm also pretty excited and I can't wait until a transgender gets arrested and humiliated because they think it has a bomb.

It's perfect for all of you who love showing off your supple bosoms to homeland security. Hey, just doing your patriotic duty for them boys in blue, am I right? I mean, look at the following old lady get the classic Tit split. Tell me if that's not anything more than security theater. It's not really proving anything, other than she doesn't have one of those boob dividers or bombs in her cleavage.



why such the fuss about these things? is it that perverts would use it as spank material? we would only have to worry about perverts that are attracted to slightly-anthropomorphic blue human-shaped blobs. On the other hand, avatar did make a lot of money...

Think about it, wouldn't you want to be the TSA agent when the Swedish bikini team is flying out? It'll be like watching muted Tool videos all day. Then again, given that TSA is one of those agencies that it's sole existence is to give people who couldn't get a job at McDonalds a pay check, I suppose that would be an ideal task for them.



While they're trying to rush them both in the US and in Europe, it's facing a small problem there as it... um.. sort of crosses the lines into the child porn laws. But really, this is all for nothing. Especially when people can turn themselves into bombs these days. Just like the attempt on the Saudi Prince Nayef last August where the dude had a bomb sewn into his body to bypass security. Let's face it, it's simply too easy to get through security anywhere if you really want to.

Protip: If you remove the firing pin in a glock and attach it to your key chain with other ornaments to disguise it, you can get it through security just fine. Oh wait, you also need to take the barrel out and the bullets because they are metal as well. Turn them into a modern art sculpture. Attach that sculpture to your keys as well. It's fail proof. You know what? Just put te whole gun on the key ring. When have you ever seen security check any keyrings? That shit's going to slip right by them.



Besides that, until they make a scanner that detects aluminum and iron oxide or magnesium that has ill intent there's pretty much no way to keep planes safe sort of physically examining every single piece of luggage because basically anyone with an alarm clock can make an inextinguishable incendiary device and get it into the luggage compartment.

And the day after they figure out how to prevent someone from filling the frame of their suitcase with thermite, someone will simply toss a grenade at the security check in line and kill 50 people. Or convert one of the pilots themselves into being a sleeper agent. There's nothing we can do to make planes super safe. They are designed by nature to allow way too many factors into the system to sabotage something.



This doesn't mean we shouldn't take precautions to prevent highly impulsive or easy as buying a ticket and getting on a plane acts of sabotage from happening. It's just to say that life comes with risk and the more safety you want, the more of your personal freedom it will require. Speaking for myself, I feel like my personal freedom has already been stomped on to the point of me not caring. Especially when it's all for nothing.

You should be thankful in the fact that these terrorist attack are more of a symbolic attack. Just take a moment to wonder what they could do that would be thousands of times better in terms of targets that have no security and would destroy our way of life. Very few of them don't even involve suicide. Imagine what one motivated guy with basic internet level knowledge of explosives, a couple tons of easy to steal mining explosives, a van and some basic understanding of infrastructure could do. He could take out railways, power grids, water, major buildings, etc.



It's a good thing that Islamo fascists are per definition, dumb as shit. Things that would actually do a lot of damage are rarely all that symbolically satisfying as the things like blowing up planes or blowing up some big buildings.

All I know is that the first thing I'm going to do the next time I fly anywhere is write "Fuck You" on my ass in electrical tape and then fly around the country shaking it.