Paranormal Activity: Boobs

Paranormal Activity: Boobs

If any porn companies take that name, at least name one of the actors after me... you know one of the actors who has a huge co.....mmand of the English language. I think those porno's these days have evolved in their scripts, haven't they? I wouldn't know as I don't keep up with the format.

Fun fact - Did you know that 20% of the internet traffic in the evening is from folks streaming from Netflicks? True story. So that means that folks are more than happy to watch movies, say one where it's a home video recording of some demon annoying a family instead of watching amateur porn on the internet... also done on a shitty home video camera.



On the subject of shitty hand held camera films, let's talk about Paranormal Activity. It's sequel, Paranormal Activity 2 scored a whopping 41 million in the box office this past weekend. Considering that Paramount only spent 13 million on the production, prints and advertising of the film, Paramount is already making bucket loads of cash and it's clear we have a new Halloween scary movie replacement for the Saw franchise.

You remember that home movie looking ghost story film from last where a douche bag day trader and his girlfriend got a camera and documented their boring lives till some demon came into the picture somehow and was getting even on the stupid day trader and his rather large breasted girlfriend.



Over all, I didn't hate hate the film. I mean, a day trader died. But I found the jump scares to be pandering and a little heavy handed. The plot didn't make much sense and it was left vague as to allow the viewer to insert their own justification or just scare them into thinking that some asshole chaotic evil demon could just come in and wreck shit for no other reason than he's a demon. But it made a shit ton of money and was produced for the down payment of a car. So you knew it was going to get a sequel.

I mean, given the level of dialogue and the glaring lack of plot, character development and everything else that makes up a good movie, this one did pack the crowds in for what was considered a classic ghost/haunting story that people just eat up around this time of the year. So it was perfectly done and on a shoe string budget.



I bet the number one question you had was how were they going to put Katie's boobs into this one and how prominent will her tits be in the film? Are they going to win acting awards? More than likely they'll be up for best supporting character. Maybe I got that wrong. The boobs win best characters and the bra is the best supporting character.

It's pretty clear that they were playing them up at some points. She's seen in a bikini in the pool in one scene and in another scene while playing with the baby she has a seriously low cut outfit with a lot of cleavage just in your face.



Then again, what kind of red blooded American doesn't like cleavage? The host of the Late show, Craig Ferguson once responded to an email from a girl about how to get men to stop starring at her breasts and he made an excellent point.

"...I don't think theres anything you can really do, men will stare at your breasts, unless their polite... Then they'll pretend not to. Which is what we do, we pretend that we're not looking, but we are, and whenever you think 'Is he looking at my breasts?' his is, 'Was that guy looking at...' yes. Can't help it sorry, try not to, the thing you got to understand is we can't help it, its hardwired, I don't believe in the objectification of women, I believe I'm post-feminist, but when I see a woman... I look at her breasts, and you know what? They're awesome!"

Now look at him on the subject here;



So yeah, there's cleavage and then there's a demon. Sounds about right. Though the sequel isn't all about big boobs. You have to toss in something for the other fetishes in there. How about Japanese school girls for those who rather have that? You folks get that two in a Paranormal Activity franchise film because there's actually TWO Paranormal Activity 2 films coming out.

Here's the Japanese remake sequel, It's in post production and due for late November. Paranormal Activity 2: Tokyo Drift

The film follows a Japanese exchange student, who returns home after visiting San Diego and unwittingly brings the evil from the first film into her family’s house.

The film chronicles the young woman’s videotape recordings in their house and the shocking realization of the supernatural force that her family must defeat.

It's pretty comical to see a film have to official sequels that go completely different directions. If we're to buy into the story of the sequel, then it's practically impossible for the demon to just up and follow an Asian school girl back to Japan. The sequel taught us that this is a sort of Rumpelstiltskin demon who was simply trying to cash in on a deal.

I say about time. Can we put that whole creepy girl who died a wrongful death ghost to rest already? Now it's time to put in the vengeful demon who likes boobs and/or babies to take up the lime light and star in as many ghost stories on the big screen while making hollywood stars out of waitresses from Boca de Beppo.


"Why yes, you can have the Pope room for a party of 10 or more."

For a quick review, the sequel was a lot better than the first. I really didn't care for it, but given the chance to see the second one for free I went for it and really enjoyed it. It expanded on the first one and played well with the time line while also bumping up the notches on what this demon was after and how it tied into the first one as a sort of prequel/epilogue. Over all, it had the best aspects of the first film and added a lot to it while retaining the boobs..

I still have one question about the glaring plot hole in the first. If your place is haunted by some unknown spirit, why the fuck are you sleeping with the door wide open to the dark scary hallway? I mean, really? I realize the ghost has no problem with opening closets and going through the attic or fucking with shelves, but at least with the door closed, if it is opened you can see what sad sad monster is coming in..



Oh wait, Sad Keanu haunts everyone's hearts around the world. The most probably and more realistic thing to do in that situation would be to just fucking run to the nearest hotel and hope it doesn't follow you. If it does.. run some more.

Enough With The Breast Cancer Awareness Already

Enough With The Breast Cancer Awareness Already

It seems that all throughout October when I go shopping I have to look like a dick at the check out counter when the worker ask if I would like to make a donation to breast cancer and I just say no with a stern voice.

I can honestly say that I have had enough awareness of breast cancer. Did I mention that I'm a feminist? Oh, why am I taking this stand? Well, as a feminist I would like to make sure that there is gender equality across the board. That neither gender is getting favoritism due to packing a penis or a vagina. That is, after all gender equality for one and all, right?

Besides that, it's pretty insulting to sum up woman's cancer concerns with just breast cancer. As well as having your sickness used as a tool by corporate America to sell more yogurt. I suppose spreading awareness is one thing, but making an iPod pink so you can feel better about ignoring homeless beggars isn't, guess what all the 13-30 year old do it for.

Oh wow, breast get cancer like any other part of the human body? Who would have thought! This is useful information, thanks for making me aware! The whole thing is just fake feminism co-opted for business purposes in the worst way. There's identity politics issues even with stuff like the March of Dimes, but it's practically insignificant compared to Susan G. Komen consumerist trash.

I'm not going to deny that cancer sucks, but this whole Pink Ribbon shit is just a corporate scam and screenings on a whole are excessive. And don't give me this notion that "dude, it's your mother/sister/girlfriend". It doesn't change the fact that the real cancer here is the corporate menace that has made a fortune fear mongering 51% of our population's tits.

Here's a quote from a random google search on the subject.

There is no other disease that we try to eradicate by going shopping. We are bombarded with all manner of wonderful pink things we can buy to raise money to help fight breast cancer. Everything from makeup to a line of clothing from the Ford Motor Company. Never mind that the makeup contains ingredients linked to cancer and auto exhaust contains known carcinogens, it's all for a good cause.

On a side note, if you google "breast cancer scam", it takes you to tons of hits for crystal medication and homeopathy. I want to say it's more worthless and material a scam than "going green" but I'm not quite sure anything marketed as "green" is marked up 30% over standard retail.

These pink charities give such a tiny amount of the proceeds to actual breast cancer research. The rest goes to paying cost of the promotions. Basically, just give your money to cancer societies directly. You may not have a cute little pink ribbon to show off to your friends that you donated money, but it will actually be put to good use in cancer fighting.

Most of all, people probably should donate to research instead of awareness. I mean, not much point in being aware of something if there's no potential cure in the works other than chopping off a boob. We're in the 21st century, man. We shouldn't have to live with slicing off cleavage. Breast cancer isn't even particularly deadly as far as cancers go. It has something like an 80-85% five year survival rate compared to say, 12% for lung cancer. However breast cancer absolutely dominates for no good reason.



Why is it that there's boobies awareness and yet my prostate goes unnoticed and unappreciated?! Huh?! You tell me, fine American reading audience. Maybe it's because boobs are a lot nicer to look at than a prostate. You don't say "Man, those jeans really make your prostate look fuller." or "Nice prostate, is it real?"

I'll tell you why no one cares. From what I understand based on something I heard once from a guy or on NPR, people diagnosed with prostate cancer will most likely die of something else before ass orgasm cancer ever has a chance to finish them off. The French don't even care about it and it's only an issue when it hits some has-been comedian.

The main reason why I flip out about breast and prostate cancer in the US is that because of all the false positives we treat thanks to our retarded counterproductive pointless screening and "awareness", it makes our cancer survivor statistics look fucking amazing because people were never going to die of cancer miraculously end up not dying of cancer.

Here's why the screenings are a bit pointless. With the constant media and political pressure to get awareness out there, the targeted groups move further away from the at-risk groups. So you have more people who were never at risk to begin with raising the survivor %. There are a lot of studies about where the effective cut off point are for various screenings but these will be continually ignored in America as evidence of some sort of death panels.

If the bloated US medical establishment insisted on you irradiating your lungs with X-rays once a year, and then triumphantly pointed to a particularly sticky lump of phlegm while saying "Oh no, maybe yous got cancer herceptin biopsy chemotherapy oh, that'll be $200,000 please" while your insurance company gleefully rubbed it stomach with one hand and with the other underlined useful little bullshit no-coverage circumstances in your policy, we might have similarly impressive survival rates.

Not to mention that over screenings are a negative thing when it starts wasting limited medical resources.



Maybe it's catered this way because women still do the majority of shopping in the household. So it really just boils down to being a marketing gimmick to get women to buy the products. It's pretty evident that society doesn't value a woman who has small or no breast, so the marketing here is about saving boobs. Which simply enforces stereotypes that women have about their body images and presentation to others they encounter. Making sure that they don't have to resort to having them lopped off is incentive enough to frantically checked more than regularly needed.

In short, other cancers re just not as sexy.

OKTOBERFEST!

OKTOBERFEST!
Jump into your lederhosen and make sure those boobs are properly holstered in that dirndl, it's time for Oktoberfest!



Let's just get this out of way.. I like two things - Drinking and cleavage. What? can you blame me? I'm a guy. sheesh. Give me a break! Moving on, so perhaps it should come to no surprise that I love me some Oktoberfest. Where else can you toast for 17/18 days straight?

You want to talk about holidays that are simply days off and excuses to drink in America? Our stuff doesn't even touch the surface of what an excuse to party Oktoberfest is. Oh, I guess before we move on to the more educational topics, we probably should get that one Oktoberfest stock photo that ALWAYS gets posted whenever someone mentions Oktoberfest, Drinking or Hot chicks in a dirndl



Yup. Okay, we can move on now. The only tragic thing is that I'm posting this blog at the tail end of the celebration. If I did so at the start of it we'd be in mid-September and I would get a lot of people asking "Isn't Oktoberfest in October?" I would say.. not really. It actually ends the first weekend of October but always starts in September.

I should probably warn you, this blog post is going to be image heavy.. as well as top heavy! Boooyah! I'm striking these jokes out of the park! Okay, I'll stop (maybe) But what is there really to say about Oktoberfest that images of massive amount of alcohol consumption can't sum up?



Perhaps the history would be good as justification for a lot of beer drinking and bockwurst and pretzel consumption. You see, it all goes back exactly 200 years ago.. The first Oktoberfest happened in 1810 after the marriage of Prince Ludwig and Princess Therese of Saxe. The party was so awesome that they made it an annual tradition.

Then, much like any holiday they expanded it to increase Bavarian agriculture and eventually find it to be an easy method to promote their local economy and it's for a good reason, Oktoberfest has become the largest party in the world. Drawing in a couple million people with ease. Then again, do you really need to do a hard sell for women and beer?



During Oktoberfest the six original Munich breweries all make their special Oktoberfest beer, which is fairly stronger compared to their normal offerings. But these six breweries this year came together to make a 200th anniversary edition for the festivities. Just more proof that it's all about working together on these issues.

And aren't I thankful that they're doing so. I mean, in the end it's us, the people, who benefit from the whole process of delicious beer being made. Am I not write? It's great when things go together..



Its been a while since I've made pointless sexual reference comment so let's just get them out there. I'd invader her Poland! Or perhaps I could just penetrate her Polish Corridor. Infiltrate her Pripet Marsh. Crash through her Falaise Gap. I'm on a roll here!

But there does seem to be some sort of conflict. Or at least some sort of tension going on specifically due to the choice of traditional clothing that is coming under fire..

MUNICH—Surrounded by the bratwurst stands and beer wagons of Oktoberfest, Alexandra Coroian, a 24-year-old Romanian in pigtails, pulls at the ruffle of her short scarlet dirndl, exposing a black lace petticoat underneath.

"I really like these costumes," she says, demonstrating how she hacked off the bottom half of the traditional dress. "I think I'll wear it many more times. It looks so nice." Long the preserve of fräuleins and Alpine cultural enthusiasts, dirndls and lederhosen have become an international fashion trend in recent years, inspiring ever bolder iterations that purists say are transforming their proud heritage into a vulgar caricature.

The front line of this battle runs through the Wiesn, the 100-acre fairgrounds in the center of Munich that is home to Oktoberfest, the city's 17-day fete of beer, wurst and schnapps that is marking its 200th anniversary this year.



Critics say the Wiesn has warped from a quaint Volksfest into a cultural wasteland: women in lederhosen, the occasional man in a dirndl, and celebrities such as Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton flaunting designer renditions that cost thousands of dollars.

"It's become like Mardi Gras—it's appalling," says Ursula Fröhmer, a Munich tailor who specializes in the authentic Germanic folk costumes known as tracht.

And the style is catching on far from Munich, with lederhosen made for women turning up in recent collections by designers such as Yves Saint Laurent and Alice + Olivia.

Lederhosen are the short leather breeches, often with matching suspenders, associated broadly with Germany, though they are unique to Bavaria and other areas of the Alps. The female equivalent is the dirndl, a knee-to-floor-length dress with a tight bodice that accentuates a woman's chest. Both styles were famously worn by the cast of "The Sound of Music."



"You know, I appreciate and like those people that are doing the traditional styles," says Ms. Paltinger. "But I, for myself, I have to do something else and something different."

She says the reason for the dirndl's appeal to the fashion set, or to anyone for that matter, is clear. "Men love to see dirndls on their women," she says. "All men love dirndls and love the décolletage of their wives or their girlfriends, because it's really sexy."

The 550 dresses she makes each year sell for up to $4,000 each. Business, she says, has grown steadily since she started a decade ago. From her sixth-floor showroom down the street from Munich's Isar Gate, she now regularly outfits Munich's power set and celebrities.

Amen to that. Why yes, I do find it sexy. And before you people jump all up on me about turning in my feminist card realize this.. I bet none of you will say that you don't find a man in a suit sexy. Yeah, that's right. We're both equal in objectifying each other when it fits the need of wearing something the opposite sex finds attractive.

The Dirndl is indeed hot. Who can contest that a dress that puts a major focus on cleavage would be bad? I guess those who aren't very comfortable with their cleavage showing, but still.. who are those people and why don't they loosen up with a couple of beers. I'm sure there's tons of gallons of beer around.



You know what? There actually is a lot of beer around here. Just for Oktoberfest alone a beer company will produce 1 million liters of the festival brew. That's a lot of bottles of wall to count. You better get started counting down.

During Oktoberest, that's six million liters of beer sold and then some. 30% of all the beer manufactured by the six breweries for the year is consumed during the two week festival. That's not even counting how many sausages and pretzels are consumed, because I mean, that's a lot of beer to drink without a single thing to soak it up.




Hey Fotolia, this is the internet. I don't care if these pictures are copyrighted to you based on the million of stamps you put on there, I'll still gladly use them. I'm sure "Fotolia" doesn't distract from boobage, beerage and already awesomeness.

See, we'll even get another picture and post it here.. Because that's just how I roll when I'm drunk.



If you're wondering, it's not actually a bad crowd. From what I can tell with crime reports, there isn't that many people actually getting BAD drunk at Oktoberfest. It's more like a sea of really really happy drunks. It clearly must be something in the water they use to brew the stuff.

But it's true. You would think that the easy scapegoat that is always used for drinking festivities is that drinking will lead to problems and fights. But for Oktoberfest, there's not a whole lot of that bad element. I guess the whole coming together with strangers to drink and converse with them comes across well.



I mean that. Going to the Hofbrauhaus in Vegas is probably 1/100th on the fun level that going to Munich is, but you get the sense that everyone is there for a good time and the drama is left at home. Let alone the walls that prevent you from talking to strangers. Most all the seating at these beer tents are communal seating, so you're encouraged to strike up a conversation with the neighbors.

Come on, even you socially inept devoted readers of mine could probably get a number, be it fake or not, from being a little social and having that much alcohol flow through the chambers of the festival.



Though I have to admit one thing.. I find it annoying that places like to capitalize on this for the entire two months time. In Los Angeles, there's a place called Alpine Village that does it for the entire month of September and October. That's a bit more than the two week time period that goes back in history.

The why to this? Well, it's simple - It gives folks a socially acceptable reason to drink. Much like a football game or a BBQ. Oktoberfest is that one time when the wife isn't going to nag you much for getting completely trashed in front of everyone because, hey, it's Oktoberfest after all.



So I guess the lesson there is that you should have some sort of restrain. Regardless if you base your yearly sales on just that holiday, it's not that solid of a economic plan. I mean, just think of the whole Christmas stores that are year round. You need something else to keep you going..

Then again, with the draw of booze and babes in boob centric clothing... I'm pretty sure that they sold themselves year round, so how about you just ease up on making an extended Oktoberfest festivities and depend on folks to come in for booze and babes.

To the rest of you, Have a great Oktoberfest!

No Funbags Makes Babies Cry

How Dare My Baby Want To Nurse off My Funbags!

While I'm always at attention when it comes to boobs, this news story crossed my radar recently and while it's a subject that is a bit of a sore subject, it's still a strange subject. So here it is...

Criticism over breastfeeding 'creepy' article
Breastfeeding baby Breastfeeding has many health benefits for babies and mother

An article in a magazine for new mothers that described breastfeeding as "creepy" has drawn widespread criticism.

Mother & Baby Magazine's deputy editor Kathryn Blundell said she bottle fed because she did not want to put her "fun bags" in a "bawling baby's mouth".

Breastfeeding is seen as the optimum way to nourish a baby in the first six months.

Critics say the article could have put off vulnerable mothers.

Mother & Baby magazine is read by thousands of pregnant and new mothers, with many looking to it for advice on how to manage early motherhood.

'Dangling boobs'

Although she acknowledges breast milk has the edge over infant formula, Ms Blundell says in her article that she did not "fancy it" and went straight to bottle feeding.

She adds: "Even the convenience and supposed health benefits of breast milk couldn't induce me to stick my nipple into a bawling baby's mouth."

She goes on to say that she wanted her "body back" and to give her "boobs at least a chance to stay on my chest rather than dangling around my stomach".

Of her breasts, she adds: "They're part of my sexuality too - not just breasts, but fun bags.

"And when you have that attitude (and I admit I made no attempt to change it), seeing your baby latching on where only a lover has been before feels, well, a little creepy."

The article in the July issue of the magazine has drawn criticism on many parenting websites.

One mother wrote on Baby Centre: "Surely putting her sexual feelings before the 'supposed health benefits' means she is a little creepy?"

Another on Mumsnet said it could have a "bad effect on someone who's feeling vulnerable post-natally and struggling with breastfeeding".

Editor of Mother & Baby, Miranda Levy, says her magazine is a "constant and vocal supporter of breastfeeding".

She said the writer was describing her personal experience and that it had a place in the ongoing parenting debate.

"We have been inundated by supportive e-mails applauding her 'refreshing' point of view; we have made readers feel 'normal'; and less of a failure for not managing to breastfeed," she added.

"The way you feed your baby is not a moral issue and at Mother & Baby we seek to support all new parents."
Health advantages

The Department of Health recommends that babies are fed breast milk alone for the first six months.

NHS leaflets given to pregnant women and new mothers say that breastfeeding protects babies against obesity, allergies, asthma and diabetes.

Breast-fed infants also have a lower risk of gastroenteritis and respiratory and ear infections, research shows.

The advantages also extend to women who breastfeed. They have a lower risk of pre-menopausal breast cancer and tend to lose the weight they gained in pregnancy faster.

Figures show that eight in 10 women in England start off breastfeeding, but only one in five is still breastfeeding by the time their baby is six months old.

I know what you're thinking.. Breastfeeding in public is gross! But is breastfeeding at all gross? Hmm. That's a good thing to think about here. So we have two view points on the matter with this article.

A. Listen, when I got pregnant nobody told me my fun bags were going to be involved! I did not sign up for this BULL SHIT. Get away from that tit, infant, it is not for you. It is only for... my lovers!

vs.

B. Women should not be pigeonholed into biologically-mandated roles that have been made obsolete by culture and technology. The modern obsession with breastfeeding is further festishization of the breast by a patriarchal public obsessed with displays of fertility and femininity in the context of pre-approved "nurturing" actions.



I have to say that I'm mostly confused by this whole situation. If you are that spooked by the idea of your body changing shape and that creeped by the physical act of mothering an infant, why get pregnant in the first place? Adopt a toddler and just bypass the whole thing.

How can you possibly go through the entire process of gestating and expelling a baby and then balk at slapping a nip in its mouth like every other mammal on earth? But before we get ahead of ourselves, let me stop for a moment and point out that she seriously said FUNBAGS. How in gods name would taking advice from that woman seem like a good idea?

I suppose men should start calling their moobs "loafs of depression". Will someone shut that damn kid up? Mama's trying to get her freak on all up in here.



Should we actually bring back wet nurses? Because by not breastfeeding she's causing harm. Basically you get your immune system from breast milk. It matters less in a developed nation, but it's still pretty important. It's also really the only thing that triggers oxytocin bonding, which is associated with post-partum depression levels. Whether the infant will thrive or not, it's beneficial to you.

These mothers are literally telling their kids "Sorry babies, these boobs are claimed by grown men and their media-drive fetishization. Have some powdered crap from China instead." Let's be all organic and healthy but then feed our babies chemical sludge instead of risk droopy breast.

It's as if she feels like her body's priority is as a sex object and made a decision based on this internalized objectification that was not optimally healthy for her or her infant. While some people can't breastfeed or have economic reasons that they cannot, she seems to be basiing her objection on being scared that anyone would see her breasts for anything other than plush sex toys.



Woah there! That baby just straight tore through that dress to get some titty. Not a baby you want to fuck with. How you gonna rip a bitch's blouse open like that, you macroencephin fucking fat demon wing baby!

You also don't get pregnant without your boobs being physically altered. They will swell up as milk doesn't just fill in or evaporate overnight. It can take months of painful swelling and leaking before it does. Then after they will deflate and be different than they were before.

There's no reason for the woman in the article to think that denying her kid the opportunity to nurse is going to somehow rush her along in getting back on the sexy train any sooner. Adults need to realize that you have to make some concessions when you have a child. They're the babies, you aren't. So deal with it.

But even then, most women's tits don't get that messed up with one or two kids. Your flat tummy's probably going to never return since chances are your linea alba's gonna get tore up a little. Exercise can help with that but it's a rare luxury once you got a kid to look after.

You should only worry about it if you're one of those religious nuts who just has to crank out kid after kid for "god". Yeah, right there around kid 20 is when you'll be good and messed up. But if you're involved in one of those cults you got a whole host of more important problems than just saggy boobs.

And who said you even had to make a big show out of it. I doubt there's much of a benefit in breast feeding a baby directly opposed to just pumping it out with a machine and feeding them with a bottle of your milk. I did read a report that said that babies who get to suck on boobies develop fewer bad habits relating to sleep and putting foreign objects in the mouth.



Ugh! Disgusting! Look how fat that baby is. Maybe he should be drinking water instead of making out with his mom's tit milk. Hey so-called "Masters", Learn how to draw a tit for christ sakes!

While I completely disagree with the woman, I guess I can see how feeling like you've been a little used can come into play. I'm thankful I'm a guy at those moments when I realize that pregnancy is essentially playing host to a 7lb parasite and at the end of which you're essentially a food source.

Then again, why do I care? If she wants to raise some anemic, immune system-deficient, cavity riddled, pale, weakling that's one more kid my kid will be able to dominate physically and mentally on the playground.

In the writing of this I saw the following news story pop up on my window page about the healthy benefits of breast feeding...

A large part of human milk cannot be digested by babies and seems to have a purpose quite different from infant nutrition — that of influencing the composition of the bacteria in the infant’s gut.

The indigestible substance that favors the bifido bacterium is a slew of complex sugars derived from lactose, the principal component of milk. The complex sugars consist of a lactose molecule on to which chains of other sugar units have been added. The human genome does not contain the necessary genes to break down the complex sugars, but the bifido subspecies does, the researchers say in a review of their progress in today’s Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

The complex sugars were long thought to have no biological significance, even though they constitute up to 21 percent of milk. Besides promoting growth of the bifido strain, they also serve as decoys for noxious bacteria that might attack the infant’s intestines. The sugars are very similar to those found on the surface of human cells, and are constructed in the breast by the same enzymes. Many toxic bacteria and viruses bind to human cells by docking with the surface sugars. But they will bind to the complex sugars in milk instead. “We think mothers have evolved to let this stuff flush through the infant,” Dr. Mills said.

Dr. German sees milk as “an astonishing product of evolution,” one which has been vigorously shaped by natural selection because it is so critical to the survival of both mother and child. “Everything in milk costs the mother — she is literally dissolving her own tissues to make it,” he said. From the infant’s perspective, it is born into a world full of hostile microbes, with an untrained immune system and lacking the caustic stomach acid which in adults kills most bacteria. Any element in milk that protects the infant will be heavily favored by natural selection.

The proteins in milk also have special roles. One, called Alpha-lactalbumin, can attack tumor cells and those infected by viruses by restoring their lost ability to commit cell suicide. The protein, which accumulates when an infant is weaned, is also the signal for the breast to remodel itself back to normal state.

Such findings have made the three researchers keenly aware that every component of milk probably has a special role. “It’s all there for a purpose, though we’re still figuring out what that purpose is,” Dr. Mills said. “So for God’s sake, please breast-feed.”

So any of you who are pro-formulas, you best wrap it up. Make it all natural.

While on the subject, is it just me or has the frequency of casearians in wealthier neighborhoods gone up? It seems to be because it's easier to get c-section scars cleaned up than vaginal reconstruction surgery down the road. I mean, hey, it's just at the expense of your child's lung development and all, but you know, mama want's things to be tight and in place down there.



Then again, on the flip side you have mothers who are way too gung-ho to want to show the world they're feeding..

Mums furious as Facebook removes breastfeeding photos

Facebook has become the target of an 80,000-plus protest by irate mothers after banning breastfeeding photographs from online profiles.

Facebook's policy, which bans any breastfeeding images uploaded that show nipples, has led an online profile by protestors - called "lactivists" in some circles - called "Hey Facebook, breast feeding is not obscene".

The online petition, which accuses Facebook of instituting the policy to "appease the closed-minded", has attracted almost 82,000 supporters.

The actions of the group came to a head over the weekend when the protesters organised a virtual "nurse-in" on the social networking website where for a day angry supporters posted a profile picture of an image of a mother breastfeeding and changed their Facebook status to say "Hey Facebook, breastfeeding is not obscene!".

A small demonstration was also launched outside Facebook's office in Palo Alto, California.

Hey, you dumb lady. If you're breast feeding maybe you should be busy raising your damn kids instead of fucking around on Facebook and playing Farmville all day! I'm a great mom!- every knocked up slut from here to eternity.

Booo hooo, I have to adhere to the Terms of Service I agreed to. Sell my information to whoever you want but please just let me show my tits and underage non-consenting child to possibly masturbating strangers!

Can I just get offensive here? I mean, it is Friday, time to let loose before the weekend, what is this "miracle of birth" bullshit? As far as things goes, can something really be a miracle if it happens a billion times every day? Get over yourself baby makers.

The true miracle would be if they could shut up about how much it hurts all the time. You know what really hurts? Having to give up half your paycheck for some dumb kid you've never even met. And who gives a shit about how long labor took you anyway? Schedule a c-section like every other rich white woman who has decent health insurance and get over it.

Try having kidney stones and then come back and tell me how bad a naturally occurring process that your body was designed to perform hurts.

I'll never understand women. When I want to see your tits, you won't show them to me; when I DON'T want to see your tits, you can't keep them out of my face. I guess I'm just really impressed that feminist were able to reclaim "funbags"

Bathing Suit Season

Bathing Suit Season

We've been in Spring for a whole week now and the only question I have for you is if you're ready for what that means for fashion! Oh yes, bust out those Sundresses!!!!

Okay, I'm getting way too excited for sundresses. Can you blame me? I actually like them a lot. Yes, you'll get a tan while wearing one and for those who have larger than average breast, it may be a little odd to find proper boob support in said sundress, but come on, you have to admit they are rather nice looking?


Click to link you to the store

I'm getting on a tangent here. While yes, I love me some sundresses and I fully support the massive outpouring of wearing them in weather that does get a bit hotter, we're missing the purpose of the blog and my mind slipping into thinking about sundresses should be curbed.. Let's move on to the meat of this message...

It's the first week of spring already and besides sexy.. oh so nice looking sundresses, you should also consider that we're getting into Bathing Suit season! Yes, that's right. All those New Years resolutions towards losing weight to fit into that swim wear is starting to turn its head and wonder if you're ready for it.



Just think of how far Bathing Suits have come since their early days. Isn't that right strange old time news article;

Click for bigger


Just look at the early days of bathing suits. That's not a suit, it's a fucking nightgown. And really, there's nothing less sexy than Pajamas. Well, at least those have a sort of "easy access" going for themselves. It's more of a dress and really, if you're going to get all wet you might as well get all wet in a semi-white-ish dress.

But you can see the beginning stages of progression to a more socially acceptable world that will allow knees to be shown in public. KNEES! I know, how controversial! What next? Will they want to vote and be counted as people as well? Ha! I tell you, it'll be a cold day in hell before their place isn't behind a stove cooking a roast!



I especially think 1930 is pretty hot. I mean, look at that short skirt. But what the hell happened in 1931? It seems like it was two steps forward and then two steps back. What with it looking like a god damn dress. And not even a sundress. Minus points on that one. Not well played, missy!

Let's take a look at some other fashions of the era where people were fighting in wars and rationing cans and other such items for the soldiers fighting over seas in WWI.



1924 is pretty sexy. I mean, maybe I just dig that whole look of clothing tight on the body. Oh man, did I just break the fourth wall of feminism and objectify someone from the 20's? Oh well, I guess I might as well go the full tilt. 1934 is pretty smoking as well, though I do dig strips. Oh how strips make anything look cool.

But what's up with the fashion of 1933? That's some massive camel knuckle going on in that one bathing suit. What line up of women who don't know the meaning of third, let alone first wave feminism..



Looks like 1936 is showing midriff. My, my. how naughty! Though it does sort of look like an older version of the sports bra. 1938 seems to be showing off her ass. My my my! So what's the next wave of pictures going to be? The last wave indeed!



Oh 1940's. Now that's what I'm talking about. It's sort of like a sundress but at the same time she's going to get it all wet! Oh man. If I had a time machine and no girlfriend... I mean, wait, what? No! Some 1940's pin up picture is not seducing me! Not at all! 1942 seems to be going for the "hey look, I have a sort of skirt and my hens bra going on.

Now compare those to the modern day idea of swimwear and you'll be surprised to see that.. well, it doesn't leave much to the imagination.



And while I guess I shouldn't be opposed to that, cause I do like to oogle the human body, I mean it does speak a lot to what can be sexy without having stuff flop out and what not, is all that I'm saying.

Just think, there was a time when someone would be too skinny. It go to a point where they would advertise ways for you to get those curves. Now that's something you really have to wonder. In today's high paced world of HFCS, it's not a problem to get some curves. You just have to watch out that you're getting some diabetes along with it.



How else are you going to get that cleavage that you'll need to be falling out of your suit and those hips that will make those guys turn. I mean, don't get me wrong. I love see some nice skin, don't even dare consider me a prude. I do like all sorts of skin revealing outfits and I know one thing for sure, the people in New Jersey are fucking prudes

Police in the US state of New Jersey have ordered a family to cover up their snow sculpture of the famous nude Venus de Milo after a neighbour complained.

Eliza Gonzalez sculpted the snow-woman with her son and daughter on her front lawn in Rahway following a snowstorm.

Many people praised their creation, but a police officer told them a neighbour had found it too risque, she said.

When given the option of covering the sculpture up or knocking it down, she dressed it in a bikini top and sarong.

"We didn't want to have any problem with the police so we covered it up," Ms Gonzalez told the AFP news agency.

But she now thinks the snowy Venus looks "more objectified and sexualised" than it did before the authorities intervened.

I have to say, my eyes would be gazing at that snow sculpture now more than they would if it was just a nude chunk of ice. You see, you've just objectified it by connecting it to a person instead of a physical form.

So as we approach the beach wear season, perhaps it's time to reflect on what you're going to sporting on the beach, as well as how much of a prude you'll feel like you want to be towards others. Myself? I'm in the stance that you can just wear whatever you want. I mean.. I'm not going to complain. Bazinga!

Bring on the spring outfits and don't skimp on those sundresses!

What Will You Do For Your Safety?

What Will You Do For Your Safety?

If you haven't heard by now, some kid from Nigeria tried to blow up an airplane on Christmas day using bombs that he sneaked onto the plane in his underwear. This caused a lot of concern because he was able to get past that much talked about TSA security that I have hated since I first started doing a lot of traveling for work back in 2001.

It was a bit of a bad timing for me. I just got a gig that required me to fly around and do location shoots, which would have me away for weeks at a time, but worse of all, I had to first really start flying after 9/11 and the levels of security were just annoying. I knew the risk, I was more than happy to take them. Hell, chances were that they just did an attack via planes, why would they do it again so soon?



In any case, I really hated TSA. I'm sure you're going to tell me that they're keeping the air safe for travelers. I disagree. Their tactics are nothing more than Security Theater. In that it's security countermeasures that are intended to provide the feeling of improved security while doing little to nothing to actually improve security.

I suppose for many the feeling of safety is actually more important than being safe. That's why we're in the fear based society we are in today. Because the only thing you really need to control the people is fear. So with that in mind, there's a new method to try to weed out the potential problems on a flight.. futuristic x-ray machines. Stuff that will see past your cloths and will only stop with your skin...



I just have one thing to say; I'm a grower not a shower, it's such bullshit having to explain that to security every time I go to an airport. Or having them look at me odd when I go into this super x-ray machine with a stiffy. I mean, maybe they'll feel like there's some sort of awkwardness to be felt between the two of us. I'm also pretty excited and I can't wait until a transgender gets arrested and humiliated because they think it has a bomb.

It's perfect for all of you who love showing off your supple bosoms to homeland security. Hey, just doing your patriotic duty for them boys in blue, am I right? I mean, look at the following old lady get the classic Tit split. Tell me if that's not anything more than security theater. It's not really proving anything, other than she doesn't have one of those boob dividers or bombs in her cleavage.



why such the fuss about these things? is it that perverts would use it as spank material? we would only have to worry about perverts that are attracted to slightly-anthropomorphic blue human-shaped blobs. On the other hand, avatar did make a lot of money...

Think about it, wouldn't you want to be the TSA agent when the Swedish bikini team is flying out? It'll be like watching muted Tool videos all day. Then again, given that TSA is one of those agencies that it's sole existence is to give people who couldn't get a job at McDonalds a pay check, I suppose that would be an ideal task for them.



While they're trying to rush them both in the US and in Europe, it's facing a small problem there as it... um.. sort of crosses the lines into the child porn laws. But really, this is all for nothing. Especially when people can turn themselves into bombs these days. Just like the attempt on the Saudi Prince Nayef last August where the dude had a bomb sewn into his body to bypass security. Let's face it, it's simply too easy to get through security anywhere if you really want to.

Protip: If you remove the firing pin in a glock and attach it to your key chain with other ornaments to disguise it, you can get it through security just fine. Oh wait, you also need to take the barrel out and the bullets because they are metal as well. Turn them into a modern art sculpture. Attach that sculpture to your keys as well. It's fail proof. You know what? Just put te whole gun on the key ring. When have you ever seen security check any keyrings? That shit's going to slip right by them.



Besides that, until they make a scanner that detects aluminum and iron oxide or magnesium that has ill intent there's pretty much no way to keep planes safe sort of physically examining every single piece of luggage because basically anyone with an alarm clock can make an inextinguishable incendiary device and get it into the luggage compartment.

And the day after they figure out how to prevent someone from filling the frame of their suitcase with thermite, someone will simply toss a grenade at the security check in line and kill 50 people. Or convert one of the pilots themselves into being a sleeper agent. There's nothing we can do to make planes super safe. They are designed by nature to allow way too many factors into the system to sabotage something.



This doesn't mean we shouldn't take precautions to prevent highly impulsive or easy as buying a ticket and getting on a plane acts of sabotage from happening. It's just to say that life comes with risk and the more safety you want, the more of your personal freedom it will require. Speaking for myself, I feel like my personal freedom has already been stomped on to the point of me not caring. Especially when it's all for nothing.

You should be thankful in the fact that these terrorist attack are more of a symbolic attack. Just take a moment to wonder what they could do that would be thousands of times better in terms of targets that have no security and would destroy our way of life. Very few of them don't even involve suicide. Imagine what one motivated guy with basic internet level knowledge of explosives, a couple tons of easy to steal mining explosives, a van and some basic understanding of infrastructure could do. He could take out railways, power grids, water, major buildings, etc.



It's a good thing that Islamo fascists are per definition, dumb as shit. Things that would actually do a lot of damage are rarely all that symbolically satisfying as the things like blowing up planes or blowing up some big buildings.

All I know is that the first thing I'm going to do the next time I fly anywhere is write "Fuck You" on my ass in electrical tape and then fly around the country shaking it.

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus is a Brilliant Film

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus is a Brilliant Film

I've admired Gilliam for a long, long time. Growing up watching Monty Python it was only a matter of time before I moved on to his films. I practically watched Time Bandits every weekend as I remember it being on TV all the time. Now if there's a movie that can scar you as a child, it's one about time jumping midgets. Let me tell you that I seldom ever wanted my parents to make any toast after that film.



But when I say that every Gilliam film is really great and totally worth your time, it's because I mean it. Even people who don't like Gilliam can admit that his films have the best peasants ever. Above all, he really is a master of creating environments. Every single one of his films is chalked full of wonder and the setting and visuals will accompany them. From the dystopian futures of Brazil and 12 Monkeys to the fairy tale atmosphere of Time Bandits and Baron Muchausen, it is always an immersible, unique, and above all believable environment that the audience is brought into no matter how absurd it seems.

Brazil, Time Bandits, and Fear and Loathing are some of his stronger works to me. Brazil takes the idea of a this dystopian future but incorporates ridiculous aspects of modern society into it such as hyperbolic bureaucracy and cosmetic surgery. Few films have made me ever feel so rapped and claustrophobic. The city landscape created feels dark, tall, methodical, and inescapable. The minimal florescent or neon lights give a strong sense of a cold world.



Then Fear and Loathing, based on Hunter S. Thompson's book about his adventures as a Journalist in Vegas covering a motorcycle race... This Book/Director pairing was perfect. The film itself carries the atmosphere of being in Vegas. The smell of the sweat seeping into neon pink shag carpeting, blanketed with cigarette smoke comes through the monitor. The mix of Terry Gilliam visuals as well as Hunter S. Thompson's drug induced trips bring out these horrible acid flash backs that will cause even the most straight edge to feel like they've just had an hour long acid trip.

Then you have Depp's portrayal of Thompson being one of the best roles of his career. There are people who treat Fear and Loathing as a funny drug film, similar to Cheech and Chong or Half Baked and completely miss the point. It's not about how drugs are funny and you see reptiles. It's about how drugs completely ruined the revolution of the late 60's. Depp and Del Toro are pathetic sad characters who are still trying to ride that crazy wave in the most surreal city in the country. You're not supposed to watch them and think, "Haha, they're totally tripping out, that would be fun." The point is that people like Depp wanted fun and consciousness and understanding, with drugs, but instead fucked themselves up and are still trying to regain that illusion of a great wave of change. Depp's delivery of the "High Water Mark" monologue is heart breaking and all this poetic monologue is only helped with the Terry Gilliam signature.



Depp is back in Terry's latest film The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus. Sadly it was because of situations that aren't the best.. and in fact, are just more reasons to add to the list of what has become a sort of curse for Gilliam. I don't even have to get into the most obvious note of his latest film, as it was the last film that Heath Ledger was working on when he died. The way Terry Gilliam got around the fact that he couldn't 'Weekend at Bernie's' the body into his film. Depp takes on the role as well as Jude Law and Colin Farrell... Yeah, Even Colin Farrell. I know, what the fuck, right? I can't see or even think about Colin Farrell without remembering how completely disgusting he was in that horrible remake of Miami Vice.

And after letting it sit for a couple of hours, what can I say about this film that isn't praise. It's a film that goes after my heart and much like it did with my attention, it never let go. What more can you ask for in a film... namely a Terry Gilliam film. This film had it all. A sharp critique of the modern western society by implicitly linking its lack of interest/faith in broad cultural narratives with its decline. Tom Waits "devil" character does this perfectly. Then you have the atheistic critique of blind faith in a very accessible and tastefully revolutionary manner as seen both by Old Nick proving that the world is not kept running by the monks' superstitious story telling and Tony's much prized tool for salvation when he needed it the most.



Lily Cole's cleavage was nothing to scoff at. It reminds me of those strange and foreign feelings I had as a child watching Baron munchausen.... What can I say, I like red hair. Maybe it's cause it's something "rare" or maybe we all hate gingers and I'm just fetishizing the enemy all the time. I mean, the Irish people became certified 100% white a long time ago.... But now I'm rambling so back to the topic... as much as I was scared by midgets, Verne Troyer is great in his role in this and erases the over use of mini-me that I have tried to block out of my mind since Austin Powers. It needs to be mentioned again, Tom Waits as the Devil just was amazing on all levels.. Then again, Tom Waits rocks in every film -especially Mystery Men.

All around the acting in Dr. Parnassus was quite strong. Many people will see this simply to see how the Joker really died. I suppose that will increase Terry Gilliam's viewership by double which is a good thing. Poor guy. I remember watching Lost in La Mancha at the New Beverly and while it was fairly busy of a night since it was a double feature with Adventures of Baron Munchausen, it was still fairly small crowd even for an Art crowd.



Funny enough, the man who killed don quixote is set to finally get finished come 2010 with a 2011 release date.. I'll believe it when I have my ticket to opening night, but if Lost In La Mancha is any indication on how much of a nightmare that film was to make, not even Johnny Depp's freed up production schedule will make Terry Gilliam's job any less of a Mission: Impossible.

Then again, if he can deal with one actor dying in the middle of his production and still finish it with little to small amounts of the story being a bit scattered because of the character's death, I suppose Gilliam has shown that he can face the vast void of shit hands being dealt and come out winning against the house. Talk about rolling with it. And by it I mean death of an actor.



Whenever I bring up the subject of Gilliam, most people, that is if they have even seen a Gilliam film, will complain that he almost never has a satisfying ending to his movies. He always ends on an anticlimactic or dismal note like he's playing a prank on the audience. For this very reason I love his films. I mean, really. He's a genius. Who else could make a movie about time traveling midgets?

I guess I'm just waiting for Terry Gilliam films to get popular enough to warrant the porn industry to make parodies of his films. I can't wait for "the whorarium of doctor pornassus: let your imagination cum alive" Till then, you may want to check out this film in theaters as it really is something special.

Oh yeah.. did I mention Lily Cole?

Let's Talk About Whoppers

Let's Talk About Whoppers

Hey, do you remember when Burger King did that viral marketing thing where there was a fake chicken with lots of preloaded commands and it gave the appearance of being live because they taped the chicken doing hundreds of things and mapped them to tons of commands?

You do? Well, since it was such a great idea, guess what they did with it....



Look at her. She's wearing a bikini that is made to look like a burger. The only question you should be asking yourself is if you can get a double double with your order, laaaaadies.

Ok, that was creepy, but not as creepy as this whole promotion that is pretty much summed up as "Look at a hot girl sing while she takes a shower.. with a bikini on." Yes, you too can watch this girl sing in the shower if you CLICK ON THIS LINK

This whole thing really fits in with the Freudian breasts <-> Buttocks mentality. I mean, she has buns on her tits. What the hell is up with that? I mean, it's advertising... so any publicity is good publicity. Hell, this story alone just brings more attention to this breast/burger campaign and now you are aware of Burger King's latest venture by my journalistic integrity.

The scary thing is that there was some sort of huge push to find the perfect girl that will be singing in the shower while you conduct your male gaze on her;



In a nut shell, this is Burger King UK's campaign promoting its new breakfast. How does it promote breakfast since she's wearing a hamburger top? I do not know. It's marketed as the world's first guilt free showercam. Opposed to those ones you feel bad about when you are looking... right?

But this brings about a whole lot of new questions about one sexuality and relationship to food. I mean, Food porn does have a new meaning after this. I don't think I ever saw a pair of tits and thought to myself "My, I could use a nice hamburger right about now". Maybe something is just wrong with me or I'm not normal, but the whole idea that tits are buns doesn't ad up.



Ok. Maybe I lied. I mean, we constantly call tits Melons, right? But that's different. I don't think I ever got a melon at a fast food joint. I can't even remember when the last time I ate a melon was. What this does do is make me feel like there should be a balance here. We get to see some boobs, be it in burger form, why not do something for said boobs?

Don't get me wrong, I like boobs. I get sad when cancer takes one or two away from us as a society. So perhaps this Holiday season instead of buying trinkets for people, why not donate something to the National Breast Cancer Foundation ?