Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Going Rogue - Or How Not to Run a Brewery

Going Rogue - Or How Not to Run a Brewery

As if there wasn't reasons enough to not buy Rogue brewery's shitty product aside from stupid gimmick beers like the one they made using yeast strains found on the brewer's beard. Or how about the time they brewed beer with pages of Moby Dick and called it a White Whale. Do we even need to get into the Voodoo Bacon Maple donut mess?

Well, there's one more reason to hate them. Their hiring practices are down right insanely stupid. Just look at this Craigslist ad as they look for a new hire.. or should I call them slave.

Mirrored with that clickable image just in case they... well, it's a given fact that they're going to pull that ad as soon as the nightmarish backlash comes rolling in. And it will. But right in line with the stories people have mentioned about how shitty it is to work there, this job ad is rather insulting, arrogant and rather unprofessional. It's no wonder that the turnover rate for this company is so absurdly high for what is essentially a poorly run business offering an underpaid position with such high demands.

Just look at that. They want you to be on call 24/7 for not only their brewery, but for the company owned brew pubs that are littered both in Portland as well as in San Francisco. So that means, as the ad simply states - that if any of them have any IT problem, it's your job to deal with it... all for less than 50K.

They're essentially asking for people who have no self worth. They'll pay you very little to work a lot and you must conform to their brand of edgy non-conformity. Yes, that's what they said, and by edgy-nonconformity they mean poor management, no forethought to planning ahead and a slew of abuse of both your time and your personal life, failing to acknowledge your contributions and all while maintaining a megalomaniac ego that produces mediocre beer to down right shitty beer.

And again, all for under 50K. What a shitty business model. I'm amazed more people aren't laughing at that except those who are too desperate for a job straight out of college. Anyone with that skillset in their description could make almost double that in Portland at a place that has a far more sane on-call rotation. If anyone needed yet another reason to never drink Rogue's beer again, this would be an easy one.

And can we talk about how offensive their targeting is. "The Rogue Nation is always on the lookout for HARDCORE UNEMPLOYABLES."  I really hope they mean that as that's the only demographic that is going to apply for a job like this.  Just imagine the how burned out they must make their employees. Not only that, but this job posting has been posted 4 times in the last given time span that I can recall. Clearly the turn around is insane on something like this.

I don't even know how to touch on the whole banning of words for a company. Especially banning of THOSE words. I seriously don't get it. When they say they have no HR, perhaps that's part of the problem. You shouldn't brag about having no plans or goals or things like HR. This is shit you need for a company - for any business! Why is that so complicated?!

The life of an IT guy is seriously one of the worse possible already. When you're doing your job right, then the CEO questions why they are "wasting their money" on having someone around to maintain the technical aspect of it if there's never a problem. It's only when you fire that person that you realize the reason why there was never any technical problems. It's the same curse as editors and other technical positions in the television industry.

This is my favorite part:
Rogues are willing to shun titles and personal financial success in the pursuit of the greater good.
What exactly is the "greater good"? Well in this case it is the profits of the company. So they are saying that "Rogues" are people who like to work hard and sacrifice any personal success, achievements, or prosperity so that others may profit generously. They make it sound like "everyone needs to make sacrifices for the team" as if they were a struggling new company or a non-profit, instead of the fact that they are a very successful business with a long track record of consistent success and gradual expansion that spans decades.
I guess I'll never be a "rogue", and I can live with that.

It's amazing that they choose these words to be their selling point on a job opening. I don't know how anyone could have possibly thought that this was the best way to get a good potential employee who will drive your business to bigger and better things... oh wait, yeah. I forgot, It's Rogue. Business sense is probably one of those banned words. 

No comments: