Iron Price Into Cash!
I'm sure you're all aware of the current economic instability in the American dollar! Why would you waste your time on that? And I'm sure you've seen all the commercials of turning your gold into cash... But why would you want to pay the Gold Price? I mean, what are you, some fucking pussy?!
Wait, you probably don't know what I'm talking about. In Gorge R.R. Martin's Ice and Fire series, which you've probably watched on HBO, the Iron Island folks live on a currency that is the Iron Price. Which when you think about it, it's a neat little idea.
The Iron Price is the basic concept paying homage to the drowned God. In which paying the iron price means seizing something from those who you defeated rather than paying or exchanging goods/services for it. Thus, it is a primary aspect of the old ways. The opposite is the Gold Price, in which you're paying for possessions, which is considered shameful for a man to pay.
It's a neat first draft type of idea by R.R. Martin, that really doesn't seem like it was fleshed out very well to make it realistic. It's probably the most ridiculous and unsustainable custom in Westeros when you think about it. It would make sense if an Iron Price item simply had more prestige or worth, but for all the Iron Born to be shitting on one another over who paid what iron price is just plain silly.
It does make you think about all the questions it does present. Like, say you murder someone and take the gold off their corpse and then buy something nice with their corpse taken gold. Was that item bought with the iron price or the gold price? Perhaps you should just air on the side of caution and just kill the person selling the thing you want to buy, that way you get to keep the gold as well.
Sure, it presents a problem when, say you're buying a boat from a relation or something and you're not in the mood to make your aunt a widow - especially not for a boat, of all things. Or maybe the Iron Price just pertains to valuables and luxuries. I'm sure you can probably buy boats in the Iron Island without getting shit talked about what you did... cause, you know, it's the Iron Islands.
In which case that it is just for fancy shit you're wearing to show off, like, if you're going to dress in fine clothes and jewels, it had better be because those are kill trophies and what not. Which makes the Greyjoy words seem a bit over the top, but "We do not filigree" doesn't seem to have the same ring to it. Though with that said, We Do Not Sew would be far more amusing. We do not sew!
We Only Use Sewing Machines Fuck That Hand Stitching Shit.
(We kill people for the sewing machines)
Now that's a house motto I can get behind.
And after a bit of looking back at the books, for all of you wondering about the Iron Price, it appears to apply to just about everything, at least according to Victarion's chapter in A Dance with Dragons. As he feels ashamed because he had to pay the Gold Price for food and water before leaving Volantis.
I imagine that the way the Iron Price works in the long run is that only those who are devout in the Old Ways really care about it. Otherwise the Iron Islands would just be full of dead bodies. There has to be a way to get around killing someone every time they want some bread or something. I would assume that coercing or threatening people and/or simply ordering them is allowed as well.
But hey, don't think I'm bashing on G.R.R.M.'s murder based economy or anything, okay. I'm just some, you know, pampered currency haver.