Showing posts with label Comics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Comics. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

It's No Wonder, Woman!

It's No Wonder, Woman!

Oh my goddess! It's hard to believe DC thought they could get away with re-imagining Wonder Woman by a man?!? Besides, what's the revolutionary 2010 new look of Wonder Woman? Pants. We'll throw the Third wavers a bone by giving her pants, but them bomb ass titties stay!



The new writer J. Michael Straczynski, explains the addition of pants to the costume as such.
“Considering how superheroes operate, you want freedom to move and move quickly,” Gunn said. “Capes and cloaks can be easily removed if they get caught on something. Gowns and dresses, not so much. The more form-fitting, the better. So tight pants or skinny jeans, sure. I think Wonder Woman could work a pant.”
I trust the man to write women well. I trust him more than I trust Joss Whedon, and I trust Joss Whedon quite a bit. You know, creator of such deep characters as "Hot country engineer chick", "classy romantically complicated prostitute babe", and "Sardonic, bitchy femme fatale who hides secret vulnerability" Which is literally five or six separate characters.

HI EVERYONE, I'M JOSS WHEDON! I want my female characters to be empowering so I literally give them superpowers and occasionally make them robots. Why does nobody watch my showssss?!??! As a man I feel very qualified to decide what is and isn't feminist.



But back tot he costume here. I'm not entirely sure that's really all that's going on here. I mean, what about the iconic costume and all that history now thrown away? Well, Let's see what my favorite feminist website has to say about this situation
It's the end of an era. At 69 years old, Wonder Woman has decided to put on some pants. But actually, the new duds are not an act of self-determination by the woman (formerly) in red, white and blue.

According to the New York Times, the new head writer of the series, J. Michael Straczynski, wanted to "toughen her up and give her a modern sensibility."

This is modernity? Where are her red boots? What about modernization requires her trademark "W" emblem to fade into the background? How is covering her once rippling, now wimpy, muscles a nod to evolved images of womanhood?

I know what you're thinking: Shouldn't feminists be happy that Wonder Woman now looks more like a young woman freshly off a college campus, at once ready to go fight some bad guys in an alley or in a pay discrimination lawsuit? Haven't we been fighting for women role models with more clothing as well as more substance? She couldn't really fight evil in a bustier-is this not a feminist win?

No, not by a long shot. In fact, it feels like the sad loss of America's first truly feminist comic book heroine.

This isn't the first time DC Comics has tried to "modernize" the Wonder Woman character, which debuted in 1930 as the creation of psychologist William Marston. Marston, with the encouragement of his wife Elizabeth, designed her as a "new kind of superhero, one who would triumph not with fists or firepower, but with love." Wonder Woman, her creator said, was "psychological propaganda for the new type of woman who should, I believe, rule the world."

Feminist outrage at the devolution of their heroine was quick. A group of activists, led by Gloria Steinem, leaned on DC Comics to scrap the "new" Wonder Woman in favor of the more powerful original-and they won, convincing the company to restore Wonder Woman's powers and history during the next version of the series. They understood that along with equal pay and childcare and the right to hold credit in their own name, young women need to be able to see themselves in strong pop culture role models in order to fashion themselves into the real life versions.

If the folks at DC Comics weren't aware, 2010 America is far from a mythical Amazonian paradise. Take for example new statistics from the Geena Davis Institute on Gender and Media pertaining to female role models for young girls. In G rated movies, just one in three speaking roles is female and in PG and R rated films, about 73 percent of the characters are male. While there are notable exceptions, like Dora the Explorer and the girl superheroes in The Invincibles, young women are still hard pressed to find pop culture role models that look and sound like themselves. If, as it seems, Wonder Woman is truly losing some of her characteristic fierceness, that's one fewer strong female role model for girls to aspire to be.

Jim Lee, the artist responsible for Wonder Woman's new design, claims he wanted her to look strong "without screaming, ‘I'm a superhero.' " Even today, in this "modern era," it's still hard not to wonder, what's so wrong with screaming that?
So... um.. the article says she doesn't look hot enough in the re-visioning. That's what it says, man. I just don't know. The feminist in me feels very confused at this sudden change. Though really, it's not sudden at all.



JMS has a long history of writing powerful, well rounded female characters. The man helped create She-Ra, rebelling against the toy company's insistence that she be nicer and laughing at a man who told the writers that as a female heroine, She-Ra shouldn't ever hit anybody because little girls wouldn't like that.

To be honest, her new look makes her look pretty much how JMS always remakes characters. Seriously, she now looks like every character in Rising Stars. Take a look at how he made over Thor when he jumped on that. Frankly, if you know JMS is writing your favorite character, expect there to be a costume change. I could almost hear him say the following;
I wanna make her look strong but not superhero strong. So I covered up everything but her tit muscles with skintight clothing and put a dog collar around her neck.


The real problem with Wonder Woman isn't her look. It's her personality. She has never been a warm, appealing character. She comes from an island populated only by immortal Amazons who hate men. And men aren't allowed to set foot on the island. This island of super-women scantily clad women send her to "the man's world" where she brings the baggage of this sexist world view.

See, here's problem number 1. Most comic readers are male. So you start off telling them their gender sucks. Great sales pitch to keep buying her books, right? Let's deal with some reality for a second. I know the PC crowd and leftists in general love the concept of "protected classes" and the idea that, say, woman could do things better than men if they had the chance. But aside from the chauvinistic mentality of this argument it ignores a simple axiom. Women are human beings. Human beings are flawed creatures.



The idea that someone's gender makes them wiser or better is the kind of elitist nonsense that every tyrant has used to justify their atrocities. Ask yourself this question: Has everyone you've come across in life who is a member of your gender, race or religion been wonderful to you? Can you honestly say that every member of your race, religion or gender has an impeccably perfect history of treatment of others?

The idea that a race, gender, sexual orientation, whatever sets a group apart from others is complete nonsense. We're all human. And any story that sells the idea that one gender is bad and another good is nothing more than classist porn.

Secondly, while Diana Prince (Wonder Woman's real name) does change her attitude somewhat when she comes ashore, the "whole men are evil" mentality continues. It's misandry, plain and simple and that's unappealing. She does undergo some growth as a character from her early days, but writers continue to revert to this lame argument, which is going to limit your audience to the self-loathing types. More on that in a second.


Oh look, costume changes...

Third, she lacks personality. That will happen when you're made out of clay. Any protagonist needs to be appealing in some way for the reader to identify with them or care about them. Every writer of that character failed to give us enough reason to invest ourselves in that storyline. Being good looking isn't enough, especially in a world where 99% of the women are babes. Being able to do heroic deeds isn't enough since that's standard operating procedure for super-heroes and most comic writers don't even seem to know what heroism means.

Fourth, her back story isn't very well thought out. It's a hodgepodge of slap dash Greek Mythology badly research and poorly executed by most who've handled her. The man (gasp!) who created her, Dr. William Moulton Marston, was a bit of a perv who was into bondage. This is why she got tied up a lot back in the 40's when he worked on the comic The story was supposed to be about feminism, but this is coming from some bondage loving guy who lived with two women. One of his views was that there is "a male notion of freedom that is inherently anarchic and violent, and an opposing female notion based on 'Love Allure' that leads to an ideal state of submission to loving authority. Yes, that was creepy.



So, the characters origins come from a somewhat warped dude. And then, through the years DC has tried to make her some kind of ersatz feminist icon, spouting the usual cliched bromides, basically saying "you can look but don't touch!" Hostile, icy women may appeal to some, but are generally not going to win people over unless we're given a good understanding of them as people. And writers over the years have failed to do that.

Until Wonder Woman gets handled by someone who understands the problems with this character and knows how to really fix them, this reboot is going to be yet another in a long line of failures. As for the costume, it's shrug inducing. The whole point of a super-hero costume is to make them stand apart from everyone else in some way. Classic super-heroes are suppose to be bright spots in a dark world. Making them more muted and ordinary looking just makes them yet another face in the crowd.



Then again, Wonder Woman and every comic character have changed costumes like a trillion times and the news media always has a weird thing with reporting comic books as if it was always the 1950's and nothing has happened in the 60 years since.

Again, Wonder Woman was created as an outlet for some really weak sauce bondage fetish and spanking fantasies. She's never been a feminist anything. So this entire "debate" over feminist views of her is pretty hilarious. Don't believe me? I wonder what the hidden message of the following images is.





How about actually sticking to the guns here. You know, the Amazons were rumored to cut off their left breasts in order to fire a bow more efficient but nooooo, we gotta give them pants instead.

At least this is far better than the recent costume change that Wonder Woman went through during the DC crossover event of Blackest Night. In it, she attained the power ring of the Star Sapphires, which are equivalent to the Green Lantern Corps in that they are space cops, only Star Sapphires specialize in love. But if you want to talk about trashy looking costumes that do nothing to empower anyone, just take a look at this..



Now what the hell was up with that? That was just a new low. I like Geoff Johns and all, but the costume was awful on all regards and did nothing to disprove that women in comics are treated pretty badly. Don't even get me started on the Women in Refrigerators comic syndrome.

Not to mention they even made a toy of her in that outfit, just so that the little kiddies could always reenact their favorite scenes of female empowering. I have to wonder how cold it gets in space and if this costume is really fit to see space travel.



At least there's some hope. I have to admit that I really did enjoy the new animated movie that went direct to DVD/BluRay. It was pretty badass and avoided the typical misgivings that Wonder Woman writers usually do that turn me off so much. The character design was the classic look, but it worked well and was simplified.



I haven't even touched on the whole Linda Carter stuff. Mainly because I always liked the TV show as it really stayed away from the Amazon princess bullshit and was at least campy as fuck. I mean, if you don't believe me, you could take a look at these two clips right here and see for yourself. Besides that, Linda Carter was amazingly beautiful.

I really just wonder why they don't have actual fashion designers working on this stuff? Aside from not being any less sexist, her boobs have inflated from B's to D's, her boots are high heeled, etc and the costume looks like it's time warped from 1989, and not in a hipster sort of way either. It's an anachronism, and a dumb one, right out of the gate.



So what did Fashion expert Tim Gunn have to say about this costume change?

“I believe in the semiotics of fashion and this new look says, ‘I’m confident, I’m powerful, I’m sexy, and don’t mess with me.’ Furthermore, she looks like a citizen of the real world rather than a creature from another land.”

Tim also pointed out that this is no longer a costume. I think the jacket is more decoration than anything else, it doesn’t look like it can really zip up in front. The shoulder pads aren’t bad, the more I look at them. They give her a military touch. The belt, I rather like, but I wish it didn’t have that star on the back because when I showed this issue to a few girls, several of them asked “is that a tramp stamp?” That’s an easy fix, though. I’m honestly not sure how I feel about the choker

The shirt looks good, but I don’t like the excess lines and I’d prefer if the WW was a bit larger. I realize part of this is that Diana isn’t supposed to stand out as much, but let’s face it, a woman wearing this is going to stand out so at that point why not just embrace it and have a larger symbol or chest guard? Also, Diana is an inspirational figure and this look strongly says “cynicism.”


You know what though, people talk about the outfits that female characters in comic books wear being revealing and demeaning to women. Presenting an ideal that is impossible for girls to live up to. But what often gets ignored is the hyper-masculine portrayal of males. 90% of male heroes in comic books wear outfits so tight you can see every rippling bulging muscle.

How is Superman's thin veneer of spandex any less revealing than Wonder Woman's weird corsety-swimsuit thing? Also, as far as revealing outfits go, Hercules has everyone else trumped. The dude wears a skirt and some thigh-high sandals.


Put on some pants! You're encouraging your boys to wear skirts and drink heavily!

We have to remember that it's the nature of the medium to do this. Superheroes are hyped up, over-sexualized characters in a visual melodrama. You aren't suppose to aspire to be the character. You're suppose to admire the traits that character is meant to represent.

We walk this line of never being able to please anyone, really. Women must constantly be depicted in the most sexually neutral way possible because to ascribe them any sort of existence as a sexual being is sexist somehow to someone somewhere. If that's the case, I guess Islam really is the most feminist after all.

To be perfectly honest, the portrayal of how they treat female superheroes isn't really the biggest issue at all. My biggest problem is just how flippant the comic industry treats death in the big picture. There's nobody that stays dead in the comic book for any amount of time before being magically resurrected because fans demand it or sales are slumping.



There's always some sort of excuse or loophole that allows the person to cheat death. Some scheme pulled out of their asses to validate the reasons that they're now alive again. The most recent Green Lantern mega event was a perfect example of that and it's a huge turn off because comic writers seem to deal out deaths as plot points like it's candy on Halloween.

Instead of actually treating death as a finality, most children might grow up getting the idea that death is pretty fungible and it loses any and all meaning that it originally had. That and the idea that comic books are somehow not comic books. That you need to adult them up by calling them Graphic Novels also pisses me off. But that's a story for another day.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Super Villains Just Need To Be Bad Sometimes

Super Villains Just Need To Be Bad Sometimes

Comic books are something I write a lot about. Mainly because I read a lot of them. Yes, I am a nerd. But that's ok. I'm sure any girl willing to accept me is more than likely going to be into comic books as I naturally have a stupid superman/Clark Kent curl when my hair gets long enough. Though I don't think I have a Lex Luther.

On the subject of super villains, you ever notice that super villains are a little off these days. Well, at the very least they really try hard to make these characters scary or over the top evil. What ever happened to the good ol' fashion bad people just doing bad things on a small scale? Take for example Joker in the following panel.



God what assholes. He just took that kids report card. Now how will his father ever trust he got good grades? Batman should really do something about this. Though more than likely he's busy being a millionaire playboy.

Then you have Lex Luther. He's not always doing high priced crimes or attempting to expose Superman as the illegal immigrant that he really is. Sometimes he just wants to steal cakes.



You see this? This is glorious. I could read shit like this all day. And if you're like me, then maybe you should pick up the 4th World books by Kirby. This is pretty much what Darkseid does the whole time. At one point he builds an evil amusement park on Earth. Sadly it didn't make it into Final Crisis. In this park he tortures some of the main characters behind the scenes. Sure, this is all typical super villain stuff, but there's one scene where he makes a little kid cry by being an asshole. The kid's grandpa yells at Darkseid, but he basically responds with "I'm Darkseid. Deal with it."



And if you're not into the basic "Badboy being Bad" deal, perhaps you should read it for all the unbelievably fucked up deathtraps Darkseid sets up. I think it was Serifan and Vykin, and they stuck Vykin in a hole in the roller coaster so that his head popped out, then they hooked Serifan up to a leg press. Every time the roller coaster was coming, Serifan had to time the leg press exactly, because the leg press was wired to sink Vykin below the oncoming coaster, allowing him to not die. Serifan had to perform this task repeatedly for hours if not days, Lost-style, nonstop, or his buddy would die.





In short, Darkseid is the most evil villain ever and Kirby is the fucking man for walking the line of being mean to kids as well as creating death traps for the heroes.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Battle For The Cowl - Aftermath

Battle For The Cowl - Aftermath

Batman is dead. Batman will live forever.

That is to say that Bruce Wayne is dead.. or stuck in the past depending on what you read into Final Crisis. What happens now? I mean, Batman can't die. Gotham will go to total shit, right?

Thus Battle for the Cowl started up. It was a series of comics that was to keep the reader guessing as to who would pick up the Batman mantle and be the caped crusader. The only problem with this is that it had no suspension. Everyone who had the shred of common sense knew that it was going to be Dick Grayson to be the next Batman. So while I was excited about it a couple of months ago



This is howI feel about Battle for the Cowl now that it's over - Nothing fucking happened! I realize it's comics where the status quo always gets put back into place. But not even that happened here. Not a god damn thing happened.

Remember Countdown? We didn't know it at the time, but Countdown came about because Grant Morrison turned in his big Final Crisis idea and Didio & co. looked at it and decided to, rather than let a story build on its own, they could publish a few dozen comics and cash in on the idea before it even went live. They could use the pre-release hype to drive sales of another work.



They handed off the story to a team that varied from capable to awful and we got an awful series out of someone attempting to create the "origin" of someone else's story. "Why is Mary Marvel evil? Here's the story! Never mind that the actual author is going to get around to it, here it is! We're publishing comics!"

Countdown blew, hands-down. It was comics by committee, more so than all corporate comics are comics by committee, and it showed. The quality wavered from terrible to awful, plot points were poorly thought out and dropped mid-arc, and at the end of the series, nothing changed. If you chopped Countdown out of the 52-Final Crisis equation, you'd have a story that still worked perfectly fine on its own. Countdown was the very definition of water-treading. Worse of all it took the weekly comic idea and beat it into the ground.

This is Battle for the Cowl. If you go from the last issue of Grant Morrison's Batman run to the first issue of Batman & Robin, I'm willing to bet that you'll have the whole story. "After Bruce Wayne died, his first and last son team up to carry on his legacy as Batman and Robin!" Remember "Batman and Robin will NEVER die!" from a few months back?



Battle for the Cowl, however, tells the in-between story and pretends to set up new arcs. And the quality shows. Things are set up and knocked down, so at the end of the series, Dick Grayson has a reason to become Batman... except, why wouldn't he become Batman? Oh, right, Batman told him not to in some issue of another comic that has fuck-all to do with Morrison's run. Glad we solved that problem! It's like when Mary Marvel went evil because of Black Adam's powers, only wait! It was due to Darkseid and Desaad! OOPS! ^_^

BftC is hollow. It's a story that was made because DC didn't want to not publish a comic called Batman for any period of time, and the quality of the work reflects that. Tony Daniel has been drawing comics for 10-15 years and still can't choreograph a fight scene or actually nail an iconic shot. He's garbage.



Fuck this comic book, and fuck DC for going for the cash grab instead of letting a story evolve on its own. Tucker Stone said it better than I did:
This time though, I guess I have to admit that it's kind of true. Marvel did the right thing by Captain America. It let a writer and a team of artists work together to create a strong, smart story, and when it came time for the requisite capitalization spin-off--those moronic "Fallen Son" comics--they didn't force them into the main narrative. DC's mistakes with Batman were legion, and they went far and beyond the basic "get the comic books out on time" complaints. Whereas Marvel played things tight, DC vomited out comic books with no eye for longevity, with no concern for whether or not the non-Morrison writers had any idea what was going on, and they're still pumping out new spin-off titles at a rate of 2-3 a week. Whereas the Captain America issues screamed with consistency, the quality barometer for the Batman titles was set at a level where the only thing that mattered was that a salable product was created. There's really no other way to put it: they screwed this one up.
Though even with that said, I'm sure I'm going to like the rest of the Batman arcs. Mainly because, today of all days, Batman and Robin 32 comes out. As well as news of the new Batgirl cames out soon. With Detective comics being as awesome as it is using Batwoman, I'm just going to gloss over this BftC bullshit and look to the future of Batman comics.



Now this is pretty interesting. Every row corresponding with it's Ongoing name is filled with characters who will be making appearances in that title.

-The Club of Heroes showing up in Batman and Robin has me giddy.
-According to Marts, the new Batgirl is one of the 5 people in that row. I'm personally rooting for Calculator.
-Apparently Commissioner Gordon and his twin Commissioner Gordon will be in Batman.
-Azrael will be showing up in Azrael
-There will be a Raccoon in Gotham City Sirens.

Let's hope DC doesn't fuck things up again.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Best At What He Does. He Shouldn't Do Movies.

Best At What He Does. He Shouldn't Do Movies.

This weekend saw Wolverine snkt out an opening weekend worthy of the comic movie label with it making $87 million this weekend in the U.S Sadly the quality of the film is piss poor. A lot of people I know are trying to cover the stink of this film by saying that "IT'S JUST A FUN POPCORN FLICK!" To them I say NO. No it's not. It's retarded. Crank is a good dumb popcorn movie. It never tries to be more than an ADD induced thrill ride. Wolverine was just a terrible piece of shit.



But then again, a lot of people already knew this weeks ago when a work print was released. Fox, back then, claimed that a lot was being added and that it was an early work print. Once the effects were put in, it would save the film. No. No it wouldn't.

I never really cared for the X-men films. Even as a crazy comic guy, I thought they were at best, a viewing to themselves. I know I would never own them. They didn't capture the X-men that I grew up reading so I had low expectations before seeing a final print of it at work. Even with these lowered expectations the movie let me down.


At least they got rid of the stupid hair he's had. Like the yellow costume, It doesn't translate well to film

The movie's major problem was jumping around too much. Ok, now we're in the 1800s, now we're going through every major war, now we're with a black ops team for a week, now we're with some chick in the woods, now we're getting the adamantium, now we're with some kindly old couple reminiscent of the Hudsons overnight. Oops, they're dead, what a waste of 10 minutes thinking we were supposed to care about them. Now we're in Vegas teaming up with Wraith. Now we're in New Orleans, Wraith is dead, and we're teaming up with Gambit. Now we're in Pennsylvania, but Gambit's gone for some reason. Jesus, stand still for 10 minutes!

A month of reshoots and a solid editor could probably salvage this thing into a decent character-driven story of how James and Victor started off the same but took increasingly divergent paths as they tried finding their way in a world without mutant exemplars like Xavier and Magneto to guide them.


Well, that's one costume that doesnt' translate good anyway you try it...

Ah, I see we're in the "all criticism must be nerd rage because it's a comic book movie" phase. The "nerd rage" is icing on the shit cake of mistakes this movie made that have nothing to do with comic books.

There's two minor plot points that are really bothering me. 1) Why weren't the adimantium bullets given to Zero from the onset when they sent him to capture wolvie? 2) Wolverine telling gambit that he's "Going to kill everyone," then killing only Deadpool, then Gambit saying "You weren't lying when you said you were gonna kill everyone." Hard to do in a PG-13 rated film.



I Started playing the game and within the fist minute I chopped a dudes legs off and watched him crawl away. This game is brutal violent. Makes you dream of a R wolverine movie. Even with the comics this whole "Let's not kill anyone with the character who has knives for hands" gets old fast. X-force is the only comic that seems to let Wolverine stab shit left and right as you would expect someone with these claws for hands would.

Back to his memory erasing shit, what makes the whole, "I'll shoot him in his memories with magic bullets!" thing even more ridiculous? That, as per the, "ok now erase his memories" dialogue right after the adamantium bonding process, they must have already possessed a non-bullet related way of erasing memories in that facility. So, why the fuck not use that, if they've already bothered to set up the possibility. It removes the obvious ridiculousness of the magic bullets, the gaping plot hole of sending the mutant whose power it is to shoot guns real good after Wolverine without the bullets that could damage him, and the smaller but still annoying plot hole of Wolverine not having those bullet holes in his skull later in life.


Well, At least I liked Gambit in what little he was actually in the film..

This movie was really just incredibly awful. And so much of the dialogue just didn't even make sense. Why does Zero try and pin his killing of those two kindly old cliches on Wolverine? He has already been specifically ordered to kill him, so it's not like he needed to do that to justify it. And it's never brought up again. And why does fake-but-really-not-fake-girlfriend-mutant's power not work on Sabertooth? Fuck, I don't know, I guess because if it did the plot wouldn't be able to advance or something.

The whole mess was just incredibly lazy and incoherent. Does anyone know why pre-Deadpool Wade has the mutant power to spin his swords really fast and enter bullet time to deflect bullets? Also, this movie's take on the origin of Deadpool's name was hilariously stupid and forced. I've said it before and I'll say it again, you take the character who's whole handle is "Merc with a mouth" and you sew his mouth shut? How the fuck does that make any fuckin' sense?



What happened to the deadpool that I loved from the comics. You see, this is a perfect circle. Originally Deadpool was created by Rob Liefeld as a complete rip off character of a DC villian named Death Stroke. His real name is Slade Wilson. Take that and you'll notice that Deadpool's name is Wade Wilson. They both wear the whole mask and play with swords. Yes. He was a completely stolen character.

Only, he was made great when they stopped making him a serious character and just had him throwing out wise crack remarks. That's the Wade I thought Ryan Rynolds would be perfect at. I really hope this dvd comes out with a Deadpool thought bubble commentary.



Don't even get me started on the time frame of this film. X-men came out in 2000. This film is suppose to take place 15 years prior to the first X-men film as Xavier says

"Its been 15 years, hasn't it? You've been wandering around, not knowing who the hell you are?"

Of course, that still doesn't make any goddamn sense; the film supposedly takes place about 6-10 years after the Vietnam War, which would place it in the late 70's... Three Mile Island disaster happened in 1979. Ergo, the bulk of the movie takes place in 1979. The opening of the movie takes place in Canada's Northwest Territories, which, along with Canada, didn't exist until at least ten years after the opening of the movie.

You know what, I'm gonna stop right here. There's no point trying to think about how this fits in properly with the other films, the filmmakers obviously didn't.

Suffice to say, Fuck this film. Company loyalty be damned.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Herbie Popnecker: Comic Book Legend

Herbie Popnecker: Comic Book Legend

Long before Grant Morrison had a grip on the weird comic idea genre, there was a little comic put out by Richard Hughes and Ogden Whitney of ACG comics...

This is Herbie Popnecker, the fat little nothing.





He can talk to anything he likes.

He travels through time.


And has terrible powers if you threaten his lollypop consumption.


And fought the Devil, after he accidentally sold his soul.


Is stoic in the face of his terrible father.


And is best friends with JFK and Jackie O.


He also moonlights as a superhero, the Fat Fury.


And did I mention he's beaten Castro?


I can't recommend it highly enough. Need more proof on this bazaar comic book? The plot of that story is every bit as good as it sounds...

Herbie's dad takes him to see a boxing match in the hopes of motivating Herbie to act like a real man. The match is between American Sonny Liston and the Cuban Pablo Popsicle. Popsicle is going to use the match earnings to ransom the Cuban counter-revolutionary Juan Buanana from Castro.


Unfortunately, while training, Popsicle decides he wants one of Herbie's lollypops. Turns out it's an anti-gravity pop, and he floats away.


And so Herbie has to take his place in the match.






Unfortunately, because Herbie disappears after the match, they award the prize money to Liston. So Herbie decides to walk to Cuba and give Castro a piece of his mind. He sneaks into Castro's stronghold...


But Castro won't deal with him, after Herbie offers him 10 million lollopops!


So Herbie seduces the female prison guard with his saucy dancing skills...





(all images are from various issues of Herbie Comics, recently reprinted by Dark Horse in Archive edition) You can see a list of reoccurring themes in the comics


Oh yes, did I mention that Herbie is Watchmen creators favorite superhero?

Yeah, I guess that makes perfect sense for him to look to this strange comic book character.