CAPTAIN MARVEL - AN INCEL REVIEW
Let me get this straight, Nick Fury had this pager to summon a Carol Sue Danvers (MARY SUE MUCH!??!) and he didn't use it when NYC was under attack by an alien invasion or when an A.I. Robot tried to take over the world and settled by just destroying some shitty country that Russia was probably going to try to reunite with? See, clearly they're just pandering to women here and giving them empowerment to break that glass ceiling with magical blast from her hands because, you know, she's so witty and sassy with the come backs against the powerful magic negro Nick Fury.
I mean, sure, Nick Fury probably didn't want to blow his load on he NYC thing because it was his attempt to get together his Avengers... convienent that they're even making the name of the team a creation by Carol. Man, Marvel, do you not want my money anymore? Don't you see what happened with Star Wars when they got all girl power? Did you not like my cash!?!!
Ha. Just fucking with you, but seriously, I'm tired of Marvel pushing their agenda. I'm one step away from boycotting this movie because I'm sick of all the political radicals in Hollywood shoving their agenda down my throat with bullshit moral messages in my face such as it is okay to join the air force. Fuck you, industrial war factories and government industrial complex of death!
Even if it's a reference to the clearly not homosexual line stepping that is Top Gun. Honestly, the only real complaint I had about Captain Marvel is that they used No Doubt's Just a girl for a key fight scene and while other 90's music key moments felt forced, that one was the one that made me sad because it just didn't match the tempo at all, and the lyrics were louder than folks yapping.
Clearly they should have used Hole's Violet. Would have had the same impact for maximum female empowerment and maybe we could have also checked off the Kurt Cobain connection so we didn't have to also have that Nirvana track on there. Look, I'm not hating on the Mary Sue, I'm just hating on the fact that they went completely vanilla in terms of the musical selections of the 90's and maybe I'm a little more on this kick because my prime teenage years were throughout the 90's and there was far more superior choices they could have gone with in the musical selection.
Anyhow, it's nice to see that the Marvel Universe has a place for women to look up to a central hero that has her own film. I know Black Widow and Scarlett Witch are around, but Brie comes into her own on this and seeing little children dress up as Captain Marvel and look up to the character is fucking awesome. Finally, we're one step closer to moving away from the male gaze patriarchy....
Oh. Well fuck.