Showing posts with label Oscars. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Oscars. Show all posts

Sunday, March 7, 2010

The Oscars - Getting A Clooney

The Oscars - Getting A Clooney

Well it's upon us at last. The accumulation of a years worth of crappy films as well as the good ones come together to make driving in Hollywood a royal pain in the ass for the next few days. While I've already given you my picks a bit back, I'm willing to change my mind on the Best Actor category. What can I say, it's a tough choice.



You see, I picked George Clooney to walk away with the award. How could he not? He was apart of two and a half great films this past year. Oddly enough I had a strange streak of watching all of them back to back to back when they were in theaters. Yes, that's right. Three George Clooney films in a span of three weeks. I don't think I've ever seen three new releases star the same person back to back to back before. But then you factor in that they were George Clooney films, so it's not like that's a bad thing.

So where do we start? How about in the half good film. The Men Who Stare At Goats... yeah, it wasn't a terrible film. It was over all enjoyable though it was just missing that extra push to make it extra special. I mean, how could you mess up the premise of it? Strange government experiments for soldiers? Openly mocking private security firms in Iraq? I mean, it had it all! It even had Jeff Bridges as a military version of the dude.



Which is the main reason why I have to flip the coin on who wins Best Actor. Jeff Bridges and George Clooney were both in Men Who Stare at Goats.. but they both had their next film be amazingly good. Jeff Bridges did a great job in Crazy Heart and he's Kevin Flynn.. AND the Dude. Let's face it, Jeff Bridges is just about the most awesome actor possible and his characters have been a source of entertainment in my life for a long time now. So maybe I will go with Jeff Bridges for the Oscar gold..

Let's move on to The Fantastic Mr. Fox. Here's a few things you should know about the film;

It's a Wes Anderson film.
It's Wes Anderson film done entirely in stop motion.
It features the vocal talents of George Clooney, Meryl Streep, Jason Schwartzman, Bill Murray, Angelica Huston, and Owen Wilson.
It looks amazing
It has George Clooney in it.



For all you naysayers thinking that Wes Anderson would screw it up or put his own twist on it.. Um, it's not proper Roald Dahl unless there's something vaguely unsettling about it. A dude wearing a fox's tail for a tie.. Totally unsettling enough.

Though I have to question the youth of today. It was a little strange that they mentioned that it was based on a book by saying "By the author of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" rather than just saying Roald Dahl. I would have thought that Dahl would be well enough known to carry his own weight.



As for Wes Anderson, yeah, the Darjeeling Unlimited was a bit of a disappointment, but for the magic that is Tenenbaums and Life Aquatic, I think Wes can do 3 or 4 shit movies before he gets into Tim Burton territory.

The film carried a really cute look for itself and they nailed the old style stop motion look. It was very jagged and jumpy motion. While it's not as smooth as Caroline, kids loved it. When I went to see it the theater was jammed packed. Bill Murray's voice fit animals so well. From Garfield to this, I always laugh at Bill Murray being a demolitions expert. In short, Fantastic Mr. Fox was just utterly Fantastic..



And finally we get to the one that tops my life of films of the year. With a year that had great films that I loved like 500 Days of Summer, Up, Away We Go, Coraline and the already mentioned Crazy Heart and Fantastic Mr. Fox what could be the best film for me in 2009? Up In The Air

There was many reasons why this film struck a nerve with me. Perhaps it was because of the isolation factor. I'm also not really all that close with my own sisters. One already had a failed marriage and the other is... well, she's like her in the sense that I wouldn't be surprised if she did ask to do some sort of cut out picture of themselves to get pictures taken in various locations. Yup.. she's strange like that.



This aspect alone made me think about the film differently. Ryan Bingham is tasked by his sister to take cardboard cutouts of his sister and her future husband and take pictures with them all over the United States. Ryan thinks it's stupid because they aren't really there. I tend to agree with him but I have to say that Ryan wasn't really there either. He is a cardboard cutout himself. His whole life centers around fake "loyalty" to and from an airline, fake domesticity and hospitality by hotels, and being a fake employer firing real people. He doesn't even own real keys, he just has a fistful of identical plastic rectangles.

But hey, that's what happens when you throw yourself in your career. You're never really fully there and I could relate considering my line of work. Long hours. I mean, really long. You would think that being in a union would help with this sort of thing... but it doesn't. These long hours that I do work have been a torn to the side of my relationships. So like Ryan Bingham in the film, I felt that isolation. I was happy. Who wouldn't be. Working in "the industry" is a sort of life long goal for most in Los Angeles but it didn't come without some hang ups.



It killed so many relationships in the past that I was already giving up the notion of possibly ever entertaining the idea of having a serious relationship. That's where I not only related to the character but to the actor. You see, it goes beyond Ryan Bingham and reflects on George Clooney himself. He's embraced that mentality and for the very same reasons I was struggling with for a long while. The choice of work over domestic bliss. As you can read in this MSNBC article about George Clooney's view on women and children.
Famously marriage-phobic actor George Clooney has no regrets when it comes to his lack of a long-term relationships and kids. For him, it’s simply a choice of work over domestic bliss.

“I don’t expect to ever get married again or have children,” the “Ocean’s” star told Britain’s People. “I am never at home and every woman gets sick of it. … If I was them, I would never put up with me for long — and they don’t.”

That’s right, it’s the women who tend to leave the Hollywood hunk, not the other way around. Still, George places the blame firmly on his lifestyle.

“I do begin to wonder, ‘Am I going to be relegated to these three-year relationships for the rest of my life?’ My trouble is that I keep on taking jobs, and jobs take me further away from home,” George confessed. “What I really have is work. I like being on a film set, freezing my ass off, or whatever.”

An uncle, also named George, deserves some credit when it comes to the actor’s “no regrets” philosophy.

“I learned a lot about death from him,” George said. “People keep on asking me, ‘Don’t you want to have kids?’ I have not wanted to have kids. Then they say, ‘Aren’t you afraid of dying alone?’ But we all die alone. I remember Uncle George sitting in bed, 68 years old. He looked at me and said, ‘What a waste.’ … I came to the conclusion that I was not going to wake up one day in my 60s and say, ‘What a waste.’ I was going to grab as much out of this life as I could.”

So you see, it's the women who tend to leave him. Now I'm not calling myself a George Clooney, by any means, but I can really relate to what he is saying. When I was doing movie productions I would be gone for months at a time. This does not make for a good relationship. At least not a good normal one.



It got to the point that I was settling for just a mate. No... not like that. I mean it in the British sense. A good friend. Someone to go out and have adventures with. That didn't involve being romantically connected to. It's clear that booty calls just end up leading to hurt feelings and that's never good. Oddly enough, I ended up with a girlfriend who I care about a great deal.. and who actually is able to cope with my work load.

That was a big shocker to me. I mean, I didn't expect that to happen at all. And while I haven't been completely destroyed by work lately, I still find that I'm doing more production work than I think I should and somehow I'm not worried about losing this one because I'm trying to make as much money as possible for the future.



That also touches on one of the themes that is in both Up in the Air as well as Crazy Heart. In both of them the main character gets pushed towards change.. or at least the desire to change because of a love interest. The girl gives them some realization that they need to change.. or at least the desire to change from the life they are currently living, no matter how comfortable it is to them.

I also enjoyed the lack of a Hollywood ending in both films. Ryan begins to reevaluate his life, tries to make an immediate drastic change that blows up in his face, and then takes a more appropriate babystep; just get on a plane and goes. His future is *gasp* "Up in the air" and it's a refreshingly ambiguous way to end a film



Crazy Heart, while the film has a lot of cliches, I mean a ton of them, it still takes the lack of Hollywood ending. Hell, it wasn't even going to make it to theaters but Fox searchlight picked it up when critics were going crazy over it. It took an aspect from The Wrestler and mixed it up with country music and instead of steel chairs, it's guitars instead and well, made a movie that has a great look and and even better story.

Both those films had one hell of a lead actor running the show. George Clooney made me feel like my past fears were justified and Jeff Bridges... well shoot. Jeff Bridges deserves this Oscar more than anything. Not only that but Disney could use his Oscar win as an ad tag line when Tron Legacy comes out in December. But still, why can't they both win for best actor? Such a toss up.

To close this Oscar coverage out.. here's The Dude abiding.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

And The Oscar Nomination Goes To....

And The Oscar Nomination Goes To....

So there I was awake at the butt crack of dawn getting ready for work and the Oscar nominations pop up. Yup yup. Not only that but Anne Hathaway is announcing them. I have to admit I have a bit of a crush on her. I mean, who wouldn't? So anyway, waking up to that sight wasn't half bad, if I do say so myself.



Moving on now, the Oscar nominations are really something to talk about.. sure, they're not as big as the actual Oscar telecast or anything, but it's a lot more interesting than hearing about the Grammy's and let's face it, the golden globes are just the mini version of it. So what are they? If you haven't found them in the many other media outlets that are going to be beating this into the ground, here you go along with my predictions and thoughts.


Best Picture
Avatar
The Blind Side
District 9
An Education
The Hurt Locker
Inglourious Basterds
Precious
A Serious Man
Up
Up in the Air

Wow, there's some really interesting surprises mixed in there. That's a pretty decent list, nothing overtly out of place other than The Blind Side. Which I'm not sure how the fuck it got in there. Yeah, give Sandra a best actress nod, if you want. But the Blind Side isn't anything that isn't done weekly on Friday Night Lights weekly, only done a lot better.

Also it's pretty cool to see District 9 get some love. Peter Jackson must be thrilled since he got some luke warm reaction to Lovely Bones and he really supported Neil Blompkamp in making that film when everyone gave up on it. Not to mention that it's a first-time director getting a Best Picture nomination at the Oscars. That's really awesome. As awesome as seeing Sci-fi come back to the Oscars.

But this one is going to The Hurt Locker. You just have to remember the political landscape of the Oscar voters and let's face it, it's a really interesting and compelling film.



Actress, Supporting
Penelope Cruz, Nine
Vera Farmiga, Up in the Air
Maggie Gyllenhaal, Crazy Heart
Anna Kendrick, Up in the Air
Mo’Nique, Precious

This one is pretty simple. Precious is one of those movies that has Oscar written all over it. Urban struggle

Actor, Supporting
Matt Damon, Invictus
Woody Harrelson, The Messenger
Christopher Plummer, The Last Station
Stanley Tucci, The Lovely Bones
Christoph Waltz, Inglourious Basterds

I really didn't find this one compelling. It'll got to Christoph just for the sake that he's the best option there.



Actress
Sandra Bullock, The Blind Side
Helen Mirren, The Last Station
Carey Mulligan, An Education
Gabby Sidibe, Precious
Meryl Streep, Julie and Julia

This one is tough. I thought Meryl Streep was amazing as Julia Child. But it could go to Gabby Sidibe cause really, Precious was pretty intense and the general idea that the Blind Side had Sandra Bullock acting... well, like an actress, could give it to her.

Actor
Jeff Bridges, Crazy Heart
George Clooney, Up in the Air
Colin Firth, An Education
Morgan Freeman, Invictus
Jeremy Renner, The Hurt Locker

Jeff Bridges could win it next year for Tron 2.0, George Clooney was amazing in Up in the Air and it'll be a real tragedy. He deserves it like no other. Though I have to say I'm really happy for Colin Firth getting a nomination for such a great role. Not to sound a little light in the loafers, but I always do see him as Mr. Darcy, so it's nice to see such a challenging different performance from him instead of the typical role as the modern perfect gentleman.



Directing
James Cameron, Avatar
Kathryn Bigelow, The Hurt Locker
Quentin Tarantino, Inglourious Basterds
Lee Daniels, Precious
Jason Reitman, Up in the Air

It could also go to Quentin Taratino because he deserves it. Maybe not for IB, but he does. Kathryn getting my vote is just to rub it in Cameron's face as it's his ex-wife.

Original Screenplay
The Hurt Locker
Inglourious Basterds
The Messenger
A Serious Man
Up

I'm giving it to A Serious Man cause I liked it.



Adapted Screenplay
District 9
An Education
In the Loop
Precious
Up in the Air

Again, Precious is going to get it because it's what Oscar does.

Foreign Film
Ajami (Israel)
Secreto Ojos (Argentina)
The Milk of Sorrow (Peru)
Un Prophete (France)
The White Ribbon (Germany)

Like you care why I choose this one. You probably haven't even heard of any of these films.


And I'm reminded of my girlfriend when I see this image.

Animated Film
Coraline
Fantastic Mr. Fox
Princess and the Frog
Secret of Kells
Up

While I know it won't win, it's so nice to see the Academy ignore the "Nope, Animation has it's own category" rule for once. Now if only they'd actually allow a comedy category sometime in the near future. I really want Up to win Best Score just because the movie's most emotional scenes wouldn't have been half as effective without it.

So there you have it. That's the Oscars in a nut shell.. one day later than it was announced. Yay me for my time delay in getting you valued information! Now you know my picks and you can prove that I know shit about how the folks in the academy vote for anything when the results come out in March.

Enjoy your hump day..

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Jennifer's Body: Pro-Feminist Man-Eater Movie of the Year!

Jennifer's Body: Pro-Feminist Man-Eater Movie of the Year!

Oh great, yet another pop culture blog, more specifically one about a film that's by Fox. Am I going to lose my street creditability as being edgy by sounding like a total shill? I mean, I pimped out a lot of fox shows two days ago but don't worry, this one is all bashing and trashing, but most of all it's talking about the pro-feminist movement in the media! I'm sure the ladies will love this one.

Clearly as a comedy writer I'm not one to pick up on the subtle nature of films such as this, but Jennifer's Body is a feminist reversal of patriarchal horror films if I ever saw one. You see, the film clearly shows that the male gaze, which normally denies women human acknowledgment, relegating them to the status of objects, is countered when in this film, the male gaze is nothing more than an evolved predatory tactic to lure one of Jennifer's future prey into a trap by using nothing more than her sexualization. It's all college level Women's Studies 101, if I've ever seen it.


The film centers around some hot chick who eats boys and she's some olde fashioned demon or some shit. While it may be about giving women the power for a change, it's really nothing more than "Megan Fox uses sexuality to kill people." Jennifer's Body was a great movie.. when it was made over a decade ago when natasha henstridge was in it and they called it SPECIES. In Species the alien gal is evil 'cause she secretly wants aryan spacebabies. Megan Fox's character is just stereotypically slutty.

Did no one see Teeth? Teeth is a good movie about a girl biting dude's dicks off with her vagina. Teeth would have been a better movie if it wasn't about a girl biting dude's dicks off with her vag. It did feel like some of it was simply shock value to put asses into seats. It's like Jennifer's Body is the spawn between Species and Teeth fucking.



Instead of being a satire of patriarchal horror films, it's just plainly a patriarchal horror film with no redeeming qualities that Diablo Cody will be celebrated for by hipsters. So I suppose that's a win-win, right? No Oscar steals next year, baby! Then again, with the director of Aoen Flux behind the camera, I better not be doubting that underdog type finish for this film.

Megan Fox is what teenage kids made when they broke into the Disney nubile starlet factory over the weekend and started fucking with the settings. I mean, sure, Megan Fox is pretty hot. Yeah, she stands out from the ugly bitches that are usually in films. I just wish dudes got to pick the female leads in movies for once. Imagine what the world would be like if that were to happen? You would think that they'd take male interest in mind when casting female leads but they're so strict about acting ability, something that Megan Fox clearly has a lot of. I say who cares about acting ability if they have a nice rack and a tan. Am I right men?



You may remember that this movie had leaked pictures of Megan in a wet skin suit to shoot the more "racy" scenes. It is clearly an attempt to show how feminist they are by "accidentally" "leaking" some photos of the main star swimming "nude." Yup, pure feminism at its finest. If a women wants to swim nude and have photos leaked for hype, who are you to say she can't?

Has Megan Fox ever been good in any roe she's been cast in or does she just get cast because she's hot and they need the male teen audience to make lots of money on the piece of crap film they're shilling? I've only seen her in Transformers and she was terrible in it. I didn't bother seeing the second one because I valued my two hours (but not my three hours writing this blog) but it's not like she was the only bad thing about that film. Just about any not robot character was pretty bad and only had redeeming qualities in that Afro-robot with their jive talk and illiteracy and big cast iron blackbot lips. Oh what, he wasn't suppose to be black? MichaelBay, you fooled me again!


The sad part is that this film is exactly like Species but without nudity in it and set in High school. Why are you under age high schoolers even messing with this trash? Go to blockbuster (before they close[oh, topical!]) and just rent Species 1 or 2. You'll at least get to see tits in those films.

Is it sad that I honestly don't remember the last movie that was pro-feminist ideas? Silence of the Lambs comes to mind.. but not much else. Keep in mind that I'm half awake, half drunk (the nature of great writing) but I don't recall too many female empowerment films.



Revolutionary Road was pretty good, I guess. It was about how shitty being a woman in the 60's was. Is that feminist enough? She did die at the end making sure that she did what she wanted to her body, when she wanted. Though it resulted in her death via douche... Yeah, I guess it's not really a feminist movie.

I Love Lucy might be the most Pro-Feminist show ever to grace our television sets. Before I Love Lucy, Women characters were not asked to explain their actions but her husband Ricky Ricardo changed all that. It didn't need scary man-eating chicks with a desired vajajay to prove it.All she had was some 'splainin' to do.



I'm just wondering if the feminist horror movie genre can ever get back to the awesomeness that is Alien. Though I suppose it really wasn't as feminist as one would think. I mean, it was pretty pro-feminism through the movie but then it got to the point where she was alone in the escape pod with the alien and she had to strip down to her underwear and hide her pussy (Seriously, she had a cat. What did you think I meant?) to fight an alien. Why? Why did you need to degrade her to just some swimsuit model to show empowerment? Then again, maybe that scene isn't male gaze-y. It's just suppose to make her appear vulnerable so it's extra scary when you realize the alien is on the escape ship with her.

It may sound odd, but Mad Men is straight up all about female empowerment... 100% of the time. Hell, it has the most female writing staff on any television show. And while Don Draper may be jumping around from hussy to home wrecker, the fact remains that the female characters get the most character development.



Though the show does lead to moral questions. For example, the actress who plays Joan stuffs her butt and boobs for the role, which is very strange altogether because Christina Hendricks is already pretty curvy. But with this piece of information, what does that make me when I stare at her boobs?

To be honest, the most pro-feminist show on television right now has to be Tim and Eric, Awesome Show, Great Job! I'm not even joking. Take a look at it and you'll see that I'm so correct in this matter. A lot of stuff is pretty clever. The Cisco stuff especially. But I'm telling you, Pro-feminist like you never believe!



The sad part is that no matter how bad this movie is, it will be No.1 at the box office this weekend because of how much it's advertised and because Megan Fox's boobs are in it.. Diablo Cody's continued success as a writer insures her position as someone who will be heralded as "A Voice of our time"

Diablo Cody has a distinctive voice, yes that is true. While it may be easy for people to dismiss her because of words like "Freatarded" and exclamations like "Cheese and Fries!" But hey, that's just the way she rolls. And, yes, there are girls who speak that way. Why? I don't know. I just know I'll never date them.



Oh that Diablo Cody effect. United States of Tara was alright, at least the episodes she didn't write. "Honest to blog" is one of the worst phrases ever to grace the big screen. And by grace I mean Take a huge steaming shit in a paper bag and light it on fire. And if it wasn't for a majority of the awful "hip lingo" in Juno, I would have loved it even more. Ellen Page can come off as a bit too much when given that range. I don't blame her for Diablo Cody's shitty script work.



Perhaps this is a feminist movie. If that's the case I should change the spelling of Women in this post to the proper wymyn as they like it. Then again, the word wymyn is kind of sexy looking. Perhaps Zionist feminist have it all wrong in their attempt to kill the male gaze. If it wasn't for that, this film's eye candy wouldn't bring asses to the seats and make it the biggest film of the weekend.

In the end, this film has nothing to do with feminist and really is just a terrible movie under the guise of girl power that Hollywood was able to market from Megan Fox's body and Diablo Cody's witty use of words that no one ever has or will use in the history of mankind.. Especially not on a fucking hamburger phone.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Wrestling With The Oscars

Wrestling With The Oscars

Another Oscar blog? I know, bpring! I didn't even see most of it and here I am writing two pieces on the subject. It's only fitting that I do a wrap up to my previous blog. Looks like I was wrong about some of my picks. Oh well. Don't blame me, I didn't even give them to you in time to piss away your $20 in the office pool.

Rourke losing for the wrestler seems to be the only upset for the night from what people expected the outcome to be. I have to say, I'm very surprised about it. Mickey Rourke gave the best performance of the year by far, definitely deserved the win over Penn. I'm an ultraleft liberal too, I spent dozens of hours campaigning against Prop 8, wrote many blogs against it as well, but Rourke gave the better performance; just because you're a liberal doesn't mean you automatically have to flock with fanatical reverence to whichever performance or film has a liberal political theme, guys.


Talk about an Oscar make-over! Move over Monster!

But I'm not going to hate too much on Sean Penn. MILK was a good film and I don't follow the holy gospel of Team America World Police that states that actors should just shut the fuck up and make word sounds and action movements for the picture show. His "You commie homo lovin' sons of guns" was pretty comical and he has the right idea. I guess I just think going through the transformation of putting on all that muscle to look like a wrestler fit the Oscar quota of transforming yourself in order to get a statue. All Sean Penn did was act flaming.



Gotta admit though, Rourke would have just thanked his small pet dogs who recently died. I mean check out his speech from the IFC awards. That's what sealed it. I bet the Academy saw that and said "Fuck this, let's change the votes around." Where as Spicoli went the full nine yards and said this:
"I think it is a good time for those who voted for the ban against gay marriage to sit and reflect and anticipate their great shame and the shame in their grandchildren's eyes if they continue that way,"


I'm pretty sure he's not making any political statements in that interview.. Ok, maybe to legalize it...

On the flip side, do you know how hard it is to act like a wrestler? Hell, they put on a show weekly. If you've never seen professional wrestling done right, you'd be missing out on some tough moves that they have to put on daily while acting the part of whatever role they are in the ring. Much like bad actors, there's bad wrestlers. Those end up doing these sorts of things in the ring....

If you've ever seen a one trick pony happy in the field.. well then you haven't seen those clips.

So perhaps the academy should see not only how hard Rourke beefed up for this role, but how long he actually put into this character to get the wrestling moves down right.

Not only did the wrestler get hit with a steel chair when it comes to best actor, it also got the snub when it came to best song... Mainly because it wasn't nominated. It's part of two more snubs I failed to report in the pre-Oscar blog. Two songs got screwed out because of new rules that the song has to be IN the film and not the credits.
There were only three nominees, and none were Bruce Springsteen's "The Wrestler," the Golden Globe winner, or "Gran Torino," a Globe nominee co-written by Clint Eastwood. How is this possible, fans wondered, when there are two perfectly good slots going unused?

The answer stems from the complex system the Academy's music branch has developed the past few years.

The branch's several hundred members no longer list their top five choices, as they did for years (and as they do for best original score). Instead, they rate the songs on a scale of 6 to 10, with half-scores (say, 7.5) allowed, too. In order to land a nom, a song has to average an 8.25. (If more than five songs hit that mark, the five highest make it.)
....

Where this especially becomes a problem is when a song rolls over the end-credits. Two of the nominees this year (A.R. Rahman's "Jai Ho" and Peter Gabriel's "Down to Earth") close their films, but there are important visuals to go with them. "The Wrestler" on the other hand, plays over a static black screen. The effect is to let the powerful final scene linger. But if you're judging the song based on how it plays in the movie, chances are you're not going to rate is as highly as a song that comes with snappy or affecting visuals.

As for the Clint Eastwood song... well, that one wasn't very good. I don't have many problems with Clint. I mean, the only lame thing Clint has ever done in his time on Earth is sing that song at the end of Gran Torino. Ok, so maybe he's also a self-described libertarian and registered Republican who outwardly supported Nixon, Reagan, Schwarzeneggar and McCain...



But still, the song he sang after Gran Torino was pretty god damn bad. But to snub the Boss -now that's just cold. The song was perfect. So what if it comes at the end when it goes to black. You have Slumdog with the dance number at the end. So the only difference is that The Wrestler lets it all set in and doesn't bombard you with a happy go lucky Bollywood ending credits? Please, tell me this song doesn't just pull at your emotions.

Yeah, I'm sure you're just in the corner crying right now.. How dare they exclude these two songs from the Oscars.


Look who got the prize!

As for Slumdog Millionaire. Don't get me wrong, I liked it. But now that it's so loved by all I guess I should take the counter position on the matter and hate it for the sake of being "different."

If you look at as a fairytale, its pretty good. Distant princess, poor orphan, defeating evil with magic. Unfortunately, it also falls into sexist stereotypes by making the love interest a sexual object who has no ability to control her own life and only finds happiness because a man finds it for her, poverty is treated as a magical condition instead of a place where you die of malnutrition, and in the end the hollowness of his victory in the face of overwhelming death and poverty is obscured by a fucking dance number.

So pretty much like any Bollywood movie.

I actually heard someone say this is an uplifting movie because, as they put it, "It shows that people in any situation can better their lives with a little perseverance."
How in the HELL could you get that message out of this film?


Where the hell are the droves of Feminist to protest this clear example of the MALE GAZE!

Did he even really "persevere" anywhere besides trying to get the girl? His brother did and became a random henchman, maybe that's what they were referring to? Most people in the world aren’t lucky enough to get on game shows much less win them. Most slumdogs stay slumdogs for the duration of their lives. If you’re lucky enough to be destined for something.


British Colonialism.jpg

Don't get me started on Benjamin Button. It is literally the same plot as Forrest Gump with an aging subplot tacked on and both films are garbage. It was nothing more than oscarbating drivel. It was far too long, even for Oscar pandering standards. I've already seen all that I needed to see in the trailers. Thanks for killing three hours of my life.

I suppose the best thing to come out of this years Oscars was Ben Stiller making fun of a certain Actor turned Singer.

Now that was funny.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Oscar Shut Out

Oscar Shut Out

This weekend is the Oscars and I really couldn't care very much about them. It comes as a surprise since I'm such an industry whore. It has just been one of those years that nothing really popped out at me as something I loved enough to see it get awards. Add in that Hugh Jackman is the host and you completely lost me. I really don't care if "really tall" Wolverine is hosting it. He may be the sexiest man alive. Then again, I'm not gay so again, I don't care.


The Host of the show... Mr. Sexy himself!


If anything can be said about this years Oscars it's that it's the Coronation of Slumdog Millionaire. We all know it's going to win. It's such a non-brainer. But while it's clear that Slumdog will take home the prize, there's many folks screaming foul on the fact that other films didn't make the cut.

The Dark Knight is one of those films that is loved by one and all. While I loved the film, I did think that Bale's Batman voice has been god awful in every possible way. I'd say that Ledger's Joker was the best possible thing of that film. Without him, I'd have the same stance I do with Batman Begins. That is while it's cool to see once, I doubt I'll watch it all the way through again. Ledger did get the Oscar nomination for his role even though he's dead. So what's the problem here folks? The best part of the film got his due.


Little dude making all the noise

But then again, that's not enough for some fans who are now taking up the dumbest causes. The cause to make sure Ledger is the last Joker. They're demanding that Heath Ledger's role as the Joker be retired with him.
LONDON, England (CNN) -- A group of Heath Ledger fans have taken their reverence for the late "The Dark Knight" star to a whole new level.

Followers of the actor, who electrified audiences with his chilling reinvention of the Joker in the second Batman blockbuster, are calling for the character to be retired from the movies permanently.

Ledger supporters at new Web site, The Ultimate Joker, launched a petition last week calling for studios to remove the Joker from any future Batman movies. The petition currently has 2,431 supporters.

"We think Heath deserves this honor," the site's team leader, Fer Barbella, told CNN from Buenos Aires, Argentina. "He is the ultimate Joker.

That's an amazingly stupid cause to be fighting for. Don't get me wrong. Heath was an amazing Joker. Hell, I've been saying that long since before the Dark Knight came out and was still in production. I think they are just upset because TDK wasn't nominated in every Oscar category.



I wonder if we're also suppose to retire gay cowboys and Medieval knights jousting to modern rock? Besides, do they really think that they'll need to bring back the joker for the rest of the franchise? It seems like something that's a moot point and wouldn't be an issue. Now if they're talking about forever keeping joker out of any Batman film or show.. Fuck them in the ear.

Besides, cesar Romero is dead too. They should have retired the Joker years ago!

If anyone got snubbed in this Oscar race it was Clint Eastwood. Gran Torino may have been badly acted by everyone besides Clint but it was still a good film all around and had a clear cut message. Besides, shouldn't Clint get something for all the racist remarks he said? He didn't get a damn nomination.



Hell, Revolutionary Road may have been like awkwardly listening in on a couple fight for two hours and then find themselves at a very disturbing ending, but Leonardo DiCaprio was shut out of the best actor role. Kate Winslet, who I'm discovering is very much a beautiful actress even when she's not all wacky looking like she was in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless mind. She, on the other hand, is more than likely going to take the Best Actress for the Reader.

Even more so is that Oscar snub is that many of the Oscar attending stars are being asked to avoid the red carpet.

A US report claims that publicists for some of the ceremony's presenters have been asked to instruct their clients to enter the ceremony's venue through an 'off camera' entrance.

According to the LA Times, organisers hope that the element of surprise may help to resuscitate viewing figures for the February 22nd telecast, which dipped to an all-time low of 32 million last year. It represented a 20 per cent drop on 2007 ratings.

The strategy to save more 'star power' for the ceremony has drawn complaints from several quarters, however. "If you show only half the people who are going to be at the Oscars beforehand on the red carpet, that's not a very good commercial for the show," photographer and WireImage co-founder Jeff Vespa told the newspaper. "How do you have the largest red carpet in the world and put less celebs on it?"

Which leads one to really ask why bother with a red carpet anyway? I really don't care about the fashion of it all. As if E! needed anything else to fill their station with. Hours and hours of pointless "who looked who" and "who was wearing WHAT?!"


As Borat would say "Veeerrrry Niccce!"

My advice, avoid Hollywood at all cost today. Highland is closed and the streets are going to be crazy all around that area. You'll really be the one who gets snubbed. Snubbed at getting anything done if you're stuck in traffic.

So I guess I should just do the whole "Who will win" bullshit and then check on the results later..

Here's my Oscar predictions: Everything about them will be boring and horrible and they will suck heartily. Pick that in your work pool. I don't care who wins best actor,Could not give a fuck less for best actress, and for best picture it's Slumming it cause it's a feel good film.



Paul Newman will be in the montage video with a bunch of dead dudes you don't know. Oh shit! It's that dude who was a gaffer on wizard of Oz who died! I loved that dude. He gaffed the shit out of some shit -Cowardly lion or whatever. He was gaffed as fuck. And now an era ends...

I guess I should write these down so you can have something to take into your pool you're betting money on with others with...

Best Motion Picture of the Year
-The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008): Ceán Chaffin, Kathleen Kennedy, Frank Marshall
-Frost/Nixon (2008): Brian Grazer, Ron Howard, Eric Fellner
-Milk (2008): Bruce Cohen, Dan Jinks
-The Reader (2008): Nominees to be determined
-Slumdog Millionaire (2008): Christian Colson

Best Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role
-Richard Jenkins for The Visitor (2007/I)
-Frank Langella for Frost/Nixon (2008)
-Sean Penn for Milk (2008)
-Brad Pitt for The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008)
-Mickey Rourke for The Wrestler (2008)

Best Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role
-Anne Hathaway for Rachel Getting Married (2008)
-Angelina Jolie for Changeling (2008)
-Melissa Leo for Frozen River (2008)
-Meryl Streep for Doubt (2008/I)
-Kate Winslet for The Reader (2008)

Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role
-Josh Brolin for Milk (2008)
-Robert Downey Jr. for Tropic Thunder (2008)
-Philip Seymour Hoffman for Doubt (2008/I)
-Heath Ledger for The Dark Knight (2008)
-Michael Shannon for Revolutionary Road (2008)

Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role
-Amy Adams for Doubt (2008/I)
-Penélope Cruz for Vicky Cristina Barcelona (2008)
-Viola Davis for Doubt (2008/I)
-Taraji P. Henson for The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008)
-Marisa Tomei for The Wrestler (2008)

Best Achievement in Directing
-Danny Boyle for Slumdog Millionaire (2008)
-Stephen Daldry for The Reader (2008)
-David Fincher for The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008)
-Ron Howard for Frost/Nixon (2008)
-Gus Van Sant for Milk (2008)

Best Writing, Screenplay Written Directly for the Screen
-Frozen River (2008): Courtney Hunt
-Happy-Go-Lucky (2008): Mike Leigh
-In Bruges (2008): Martin McDonagh
-Milk (2008): Dustin Lance Black
-WALL·E (2008): Andrew Stanton, Pete Docter, Jim Reardon

Best Writing, Screenplay Based on Material Previously Produced or Published
-The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008): Eric Roth, Robin Swicord
-Doubt (2008/I): John Patrick Shanley
-Frost/Nixon (2008): Peter Morgan
-The Reader (2008): David Hare
-Slumdog Millionaire (2008): Simon Beaufoy

Best Achievement in Cinematography
-Changeling (2008): Tom Stern <------ MAINLY BECAUSE I'M A LOS ANGELES WHORE! God, the look of the film blew me away
-The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008): Claudio Miranda
-The Dark Knight (2008): Wally Pfister
-The Reader (2008): Roger Deakins, Chris Menges
-Slumdog Millionaire (2008): Anthony Dod Mantle

And who really cares about the rest, am I right? So enjoy the Oscars. I'm sure it'll be shoved in your face for a long time. As for me. I may as well just get some sleep. I'm in much need of it after spending most of the morning with beef tripe.

HAPPY OSCAR DAY! Now go out and do something productive.