Saturday, April 2, 2011

Po-Po-Po-Poker Face

Po-Po-Po-Poker Face

Now in the world of weird news, it seems like Lady Gaga has come across something that even she finds strange. Breast milk ice cream.
Lady GaGa sues ice cream parlour over 'Baby Gaga' breast-milk product
Flamboyant pop star Lady Gaga is said to be suing the owner of a London ice cream parlour over its breast-milk product, Baby Gaga.


GaGa - real name Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta - is one of America's most successful artists and won a slew of Grammy Awards, last month. But the gay-rights advocate is now taking legal action against Matt O'Connor over a product her lawyers call ‘nausea-inducing’ and ‘intended to take advantage of [her] reputation and goodwill’.

The product, which contains human breast milk, launched two weeks ago to global publicity.

According to the Daily Mail, the shop - The Icecreamists – are accused of 'riding on the coattails' of Lady Gaga by using a waitress dressed like her to serve the product.

They are told to 'change the name of the ice cream to something which is not aurally, visually or conceptually similar to Lady Gaga' or court action will be taken.
Owner Matt O'Connor called the action "utterly ridiculous".

He told the Evening Standard: 'This is a David versus Goliath battle I’m convinced we will eventually win. The world’s biggest superstar has taken umbrage with the world’s smallest ice-cream parlour.'
"For Lady Gaga to accuse us of stealing her image is laughable when you consider how much she has borrowed from popular culture to create her look and music.

"She also seems to have forgotten that since the dawn of time the word gaga has been one of the first discernible phrases to come from a baby’s mouth. This is why we chose the name.

"As for her assertion that our product is distasteful, perhaps she should reflect on her blood-spurting performance at the MTV Video Music Awards, or the fact she wears clothes fabricated from the flesh of dead animals. We have applied to register the trademark Baby Gaga and are confident we’ll secure this."

A spokesman for Lady Gaga refused to comment.

So let me get this straight - Coming out in the MTV awards ceremony looking like a giant used tampon is kosher, but having your name used in an Ice Cream parlor named "Baby Gaga" is off the table?

It seems so, Lady Gaga is suing them over the name of the ice cream. I guess Lady Gaga doesn't have enough money already and clearly needs to protect her own interests by suing a msall ice cream shop.

Why yes, this is exactly why we have a court system in place and it's a good use of that resource if I ever saw one.
"As for her assertion that our product is distasteful, perhaps she should reflect on her blood-spurting performance at the MTV Video Music Awards, or the fact she wears clothes fabricated from the flesh of dead animals. We have applied to register the trademark Baby Gaga and are confident we’ll secure this."

Why yes.. Gaga, why you getting all mad at boob milk being used to make ice cream when you're wearing a meat dress? I guess that's just the way things are. Crazy artist who is on the cutting edge of taste and culture draws the line at human breast milk.

"Hmmmm, boob milk ice cream? Nope! That's totally gross!"

But then again, I probably wouldn't eat any ice cream made from breast milk also. I mean, milk from a human? Ugh! No thank you. I'll get it from this huge animal as it chews its cud.

Though maybe I'm being to hasty on the matter. I should give it a shot. It could be good after all. Why yes, please give me a single scoop of baby gaga in a waffle cone, please.

Maybe this just shows that Gaga is a bourgeois capitalist pig and ardent defender of liberalism. I mean, what next? Though I could have fun with this news piece with the naming. Gaga milk bilk saGa: Pop Star Perturbed over name nicking, vows to suck Mammary Merchants Dry.

Boooyah!

I mean, come on GaGa, let's just let it be. The product on a whole sounds like it could be some sort of delicious novelty item and this publicity stunt, in its mutual benefits, is good for all parties involved. I'm surprised and a little disappointed that Gaga didn't endorse this product upon hearing about it and chug a few bottle of breast milk for the cameras. It would seem like it would be just her type of thing.

But now I'm stuck thinking about a lightly sweetened breast milk gelato, solid texture with speckles of vanilla bark mixed in. Oh man, I wonder if this fetish already exist on the internet.

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