Friday, October 26, 2018



In my continuing efforts to beat it into your heads that I love Costco and pray to it like it is a church, going to it often twice a week like some elderly women hitting up their local house of worship hoping to get in just as the time is ticking down, I want to talk about the fact that Costco is perfect for Halloween.

The biggest complete most people have with Costco is that even with a big household, the fact that the place has SOOOOOO much bulk items means you can never really use all the stuff you are buying. This is when the time of the year for excess is perfect. You can def. use that giant bag of trick or treat candy.

Look, the bag is fucking huge, and even though I don't generally have that many trick or treaters, we all know that everyone buys candy not for the kids, but for the hope that you have candy without the need of wearing a costume, having a kid and walking around the block. I mean, sure, if they show up, I'll go hard on putting the candy in their bag, but the reality is that you'll be ending up with a lot of candy once it is all said and done.

The only thing now is to choose the means of your destruction. You can get the fun size candy, which isn't all that great cause there's nothing fun about a tiny candy. Or you can go full costco and just buy boxes of the full sized items. Look, I wish trick or treating in my hood was still a thing, but it generally isn't. So rewarding those who choose to come out by giving them full sized bars is always nice.

Or hey, you can buy the small Costco toys if you don't want to mess with the amount of food allergies that kids these days seem to have, but that doesn't leave you with a mess of candy you can regret eating later.