Pot On The Books

Pot On The Books

Well, it looks like we're getting a chance to legalize pot come November. Fuck gay rights, as long as I can toke up in front of a cop, it's all good, right? Yup, who knows, maybe we'll actually legalize it this time;

California voters will decide this November whether to legalize and regulate adult recreational use of marijuana as the Secretary of State today certified that a Bay Area-based effort to put the issue on the ballot has collected enough signatures to do so.

If passed, California would have the most comprehensive laws on legal marijuana in the entire world, marijuana reform advocates say. Opponents are confident they will easily defeat the measure.

The vote will be the second time in nearly 40 years that people in the Golden State will decide the issue of legalization, though the legal framework and cultural attitudes surrounding marijuana have changed significantly the past four decades. If Californians pass the measure, it would be the first in the nation to do so as similar efforts in other states all have failed.

Backers needed to collect at least 433,971 valid signatures of registered voters and the Secretary of State said they met that threshold.

If voters approve the ballot measure, it will become legal for Californians 21 and older to grow and possess up to an ounce of marijuana under state law. Local jurisdictions could tax and regulate it, or decide not to participate. Marijuana would continue to be banned outright by federal law.

Current state law allows a person, with a doctor's approval, to possess an amount of marijuana that is reasonably related to the patient's current medical needs. People also can obtain cards identifying themselves as a patient, which helps in interactions with law enforcement.

"There is no state that currently allows adults to grow marijuana for personal (recreational) use, but what is totally different and will be a game-changer internationally is this would allow authorized sales to adults as determined by a local authority," said Stephen Gutwillig, California State Director of the Drug Policy Alliance Network, an organization advocating for changes in drug laws.

The major backers of the initiative - the founder of an Oakland-based marijuana trade school, a retired Orange County judge and various drug law reform organizations - are planning to oversee a $10 million campaign to push the measure.

My first reaction is why do you people care so much about weed? Geez, try being a little incremental and decriminalize it first, don't you think? No way can you go "All in" and expect to get it passed. Yes, I think it would be fucking funny to see what the Federal Government's response to all this would be, but seriously now.. Do you need it legalized? If you couldn't get gay marriage passed, you wont get weed legalized. And if you do, then we sure as hell don't know what our priorities are.

The article may be a little old but it's news since the Secretary of State officially certified the signatures today. So hey, gonna legalize it. We're gonna get our law enforcement funding pulled by the Obama administration and we're gonna slide further into bankruptcy. Can I get a "Hell Yeah" up in this bitch? Who cares about education funding when we can all just kick it with some weeeed, yo. No need for proper school budgets unless they have botany or herbal studies.



It's just not possible at all in this or any other reality. Especially with the mindset of thinking about the children. Even if we're in a sort of California über alles sort of state. Though, anything but a crushing defeat will only propel the legalization movement further, at least to the minds of those who are trying to push this stuff into law.

I realize that weed prohibition has enslaved more American blacks than slavery. And I have heard that if you don't support weed legalization then you implicitly support millions of nonviolent users being sent to prison for it. But you do realize that they just signed a bill in the senate to ban smoking literally everywhere outside, no parks/benches/picnic tables, etc. And you're shooting for a legalization of weed?



I NEED TO LIGHT MARIJUANA LEAVES ON FIRE AND THEN INHALE THE SMOKE MANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN. I. CARE. SO. MUCH. ABOUT. INHALING THAT SMOKE

It's clear that Obama's administration is dead set against legalization, so this will do nothing. And it won't even reduce crime so long as its still illegal in Mexico. Though really, why are you importing your weed when we have perfectly good room to grow our own locally. Don't you realize you're being bad to the environment by wasting so much gas to transport that Mexican shit over? Come on, man. Think green for a change!



You may think that California is pretty liberal, but California seems to be one of the least progressive states in the nation. California is a metaphorical boulevard of broken dreams. Think of it this way, California gave us Ronald Reagan. All you stoners, do yourself a huge favor and NOT get ripped on voting day. I'd hate to see this share the same fate as a Simpsons episode and you ending up forgetting to vote.

Let's face it. Even Jerry Brown is opposing this. Given, he was a terrible governor decades ago and he's going to be a terrible governor now, too. And when it comes to those undecideds on this issue, they are most likely going to be women in their 30's and 40's with children. Those who don't have children will see that their lazy ass boyfriends are pot heads. So sorry, this shit isn't passing.



And what if it does? Well, just think of the number of Checkpoints on every highway coming out of California. Nevada, Oregon and Arizona will have cops with those dogs sniffing out for the tiniest trace of that demon weed in their vehicles or on persons. It'll be comical, if it's not a nuisance to drive on vacation.

But hey, it does mean that with legalization, the population of California will go up and that would lead to more taxes being levied on them. I mean, everyone loves drugs, right? This can lead to nothing but money raining down on public schools and all the systems that need some funding badly...okay, who am I kidding? All that money will just go to stupid props we pass like crazy trains and more police officers on whatever street corner.



So what's my stance? I really don't give a shit. I don't smoke it. Maybe my Dad would like it. I mean, he does have a pretty mean bong sitting around in his computer area and all. But I frankly don't give a shit about legalization. It's not like it's all that difficult to get now and if you smoke it in the privacy of your own home, what's the problem?

Now I will be pretty peeved if we can get pot legalized but can't get gay rights.

Would You Like To Take A Survey?

Would You Like To Take A Survey?

Cause if you do, the Republican National Convention would like to push this poll on you.



question #4 is getting the most attention but there's some other gems in there too



In #7, is "$1.6 trillion dollars" pronounced aloud as "one point six trillion dollars dollars"? Discuss
but they should have wrote out all the zeroes too. That would have really stuck it to those crazy liberals!

Polls like that one are the best. You get wacky shit on there like "Do you feel that the continuing slide of America into a state of lawless, moral-less atheism should be of more concern to lawmakers today? Y/N"

Just makes you livid. Damn those bureaucrats in warshington. They better not be standing between me and my doctor! It's no wonder why so many people don't like to deal or even think of politics. Better to live blissfully ignorant than realize how much bad shape this nation is.

So here you go. Let's fix up this survey and let's try to take it once more with better questions to answer:





P.S. You're suppose to click on the pictures. Just want you mid-west folks to be aware of that.

The Real America Votes

The Real America Votes



On this election day I'm reminded of what Sarah Palin said

"I believe that the best of America is in these small towns that we get to visit, and in these wonderful little pockets of what I call the real America, being here with all of you hardworking, very patriotic, um, very, um, pro-America areas of this great nation."

I hope that all of you in the fake America like Los Angeles, New York and any "Big City" that doesn't have a main street with a hardware store and a coffee shop show just how anti-American we are by voting for change.



America is not a Chevy truck commercial. This isn't any ones country. This is "Are" Country and I can't sit by and think that Sarah Palin would be, as cliched as it sounds, be a (lack of) heart beat away from becoming our nations first first lady in a way never heard before.


pro-America, not to be mistaken for pro-wrestling

Last I recall, our nation was founded by immigrants and the trimming of other societies that came here for freedom to live free lives. The last time I was in a small town I got a lot of looks because I wasn't blonde or white. I guess the best thing about this whole situation is that the most electoral votes come from these non pro-America places. Way to shoot yourself in the foot, Palin.

So far election turn out is on the high. People having to wait 3 hours to vote. Maybe I'm just in a place that's filled with apathetic turn outs, but there wasn't any wait for me to get an I VOTED stick. Hmmm, where should I go and load up on the free stuff?


So after casting your vote you have nothing to do other than complain some about the results. The choice now is how to watch the info come in? CNN is going to take us into the future because Wolf Blitzer will be talking to a Hologram

As election night officially kicks off in just a few hours, the network’s Wolf Blitzer will be conducting interviews with faraway strategists not via the traditional two-pane window, but by hologram. Believe it or not, professionals in Chicago and Phoenix will be beamed live to CNN’s New York studios in order to give viewers a look at Wolf and a ghostly counterpart.

Did CNN not see the Lawnmower man? Were they asleep during Tron? The shit just got real. You don't want to mess around with virtual reality. It's like WOW, only filled with less apathetic and lethargic people. Without substance, who knows what they will do? I hear there was voter intimidation at some local insane asylums from ghost in transparent sheets.

The main issue I have with this is that while I'm a gadget type of guy, I couldn't care less about 3D hologram graphs. I couldn't care less about Hologram interviews. I'm perfectly fine with just seeing one right wing conservative yap on to a left wing liberal about the current swing in the poll outcome. If you're talking about small town America being the ones that are pro-America, why are you trying to scare them with this new technology? To them it's like showing a lighter to a caveman.


The Situation Room

You shouldn't try to sell your coverage by the neat toys you got. Just give me the lay down and tell it to me straight, what states went to whom and who is winning. Stop trying to make it some web 2.0 sort of information. The fact that you're on my tv screen and you're giving me the general info on the election I'll watch. I'll tell you what I wont watch. Coverage that constantly freezes up because the equipment is so cutting edge and we all know how well new program software runs. There really is no need for a green screen. Seriously. Just give me the results.


Save the green screen for Hollywood

With the polls closing across the country, it's only a matter of time before we see what the next four years holds for our nation. If you haven't gone out and voted yet, by all means do so.

Don't Bother Asking Me No Poll

By The Undecided Voter

I think this is the Arab guy.

Them polling people called up last week and asked me which person I wanted as President and I told them the same thing I'm fixin' to tell you: I ain't got no idea who I'm votin' for. Only just now put on the TV and saw there was some sort of election thing happenin'. Some convention parties or somethin' goin' on and balloons and stuff.

I don't even know who it is. This guy Obama and this McCain feller. I think I heard of the McCain one, but I don't know. Is he the one with the blimp? Harold at the Blockbuster Video said he was good. The blimp guy, I mean. I don't know if that's McCain.

And then is the other feller a Mexican or an Arab or somethin'? I was gettin' my hair cut and I saw his picture on the TV but they was runnin' the blow dryer and I didn't hear what they said. And there's lady talks like the Nanny and the old squinty guy with the white hair, who are they? Are they the other party or what? Eh, I don't know.

Blimp guy??? Maybe??? Wants gold coins?????

I registered independent. I used to be a Democrat but then I read a while back the Democrats wanted us to lose a war or somethin' and that is just damn shameful. But that was awhile back so I ain't gonna blame whichever one is the Democrat for it this time. Nope. I got me an open mind on this one.

The main things important to me is the economy, change, Iraq, and national security. I also want lower taxes and universal healthcare. I don't really trust that Arab guy on the national security, cuz what if he is one of them? I saw an email my cousin got said the Obama guy I think won't do no pledge unless his hand is on a Korean. I don't even know about that but it sounds weird.

On the other hand, I don't think the old guy knows about no change or economies. I heard he lives in seven different house and got his self a rich wife he married from Alaska.

Education is important to me too. I don't want nobody tellin' me I gotta teach creationism and especially not when I'm home schoolin' my kids. The Bible ain't got no place in my room where I set up a dry erase board and teach my baby girls about dividing stuff.

I know this one. This is the old President ain't nobody likes no more.

If only I could get me some vouchers so I could afford to get that Ten Commandments statue moved out of my front yard. Previous owners left it. Thought they was cute or somethin'. I covet who I damn well please!

And ya'll see them cranes fallin' down? Which one of these so-called presidents gonna take care of cranes fallin' down? Musta been 100 cranes fell down over the summer. I ain't seen no white paper on that. Give me a URL I'll plug that into my computer and look at that sometime.

Iraq is important to me, like I said. What's important is we start bringin' our boys home in victory as soon as possible. It was a war we shouldn't have gone into in the first place, but now we're there we messed it all up and we gotta fix it and honor our sacrifices by winning. So shit yeah I support the troops. I support 'em by bringin' 'em home in victory.

My opinion on gay marriages is pretty complicated. It's fine if ya'll marry whoever or whatever ya'll want, so long as I don't have to hear about it when I'm tryin' to eat dinner. They had a guy on a TV married his own sister in some foreign country and that is exactly what I don't want to see gays doin' here in America. Keep it to yourself and let the states decide. Marriage is between a man and a woman who ain't his sister or a dog. Or two women. And don't put no dudes kissing each other on the mouth on the TV.

Why is he always pointin' at people? A little elite if you ask me. Like a commando.

The very single most important thing of all to me is change. This is a change election, so I think we gotta get the bums out. I'm sick of the guy in there. Eight years is enough. Now I know one guy ain't from his party, but I heard the other guy is a maverick. So I don't know. One guy is new and we ain't had an Arab president before, but then on the other hand that other guy (Mitt Huckabee??) was a POW in Vietnam and he'll be the oldest president which is also a first when you think about it.

It's a hard decision. Does the Arab got the experience to make the change I need? Does the guy who got tortured only he don't call it torture under the new torture rules have the maverick heart to reform Washington? Where did Hillary Clinton go? I was watchin' one day and they said she won South Dakota and then she's just gone. Anyways, I don't know yet. I ain't made up my mind.

Aw, you know what? To hell with this. I'm votin' LaRouche again.

-The Undecided Voter

This was a special update by the average Undecided voter. Please don't worry, after they were done typing away I beat them up with a bat. Now that's how you rock the Vote.