That's Racist!

That's Racist!

Fried Chicken is one of those meals that.. well.. yeah, it's typically attached to some stereotype about black people. Oh man, how much they must love that chicken, right? It looks like Australia is going and one upping the stakes a little as they just came out with this ad for KFC down under....



First thought to cross my mind?



Hmmm. Maybe the two teams are well known rivals and the dude is in an awkward situation because he's at their game and his team is losing? I can't even tell what the fuck he is saying at first because the Australian accent, much like the Australian nation, is fucking trash. And can I just say this now - Vegemite is an affront to god. Marmite on the other hand.. rules.

So... what's the reaction to this? Well, let's turn to Youtube for a reaction;


I wonder if it was a black man holding up KFC to a white crowd if the liberal PC police would be making a fuss about it. I'm not entirely sure. Maybe if KFC had real fries, more white people would eat there often. I can't stand their fries. Let alone their chicken. Who even considers that chicken? Maybe I am racist because I really can't stand fried chicken. When I grew up I only ate Pioneer chicken and even then, I would generally only eat the skin. Chicken is one of those foods that I find entirely too boring in flavor.

It has nothing to do with racism, I just don't like fried chicken. You really have to sell me on Chicken in general though. Much like in Australia you have to sell them on the idea that they're being racist. Look at this classic take on the black face..



I'm not going to try to defend them. I mean, let's just face the facts. Australia doesn't have a long history of institutionalized racism like the US. So things like this doesn't really bother them. Besides, you can't really say much about them when you look at the Koreans and their take on fried chicken....



I mean, let's not blame them... Is it even possible to make a non-racist KFC commercial? It would go something along the lines of this:

(blank screen)

Computer generated voice: We sell chicken that is fried.

(25 seconds of silence)

Fried chicken sells itself, really. I suppose you can add in "We have fried chicken. It is delicious. If you like fried chicken then come here. If you don't like fried chicken, go somewhere else. There, that's all you really need.

If you think that's racist, You haven't seen sit. I mean. The Japanese take the whole "Black people look like Monkey's" thing to a new level with this ad;



It's a Japanese ad for EMOILE and it's an extremely racist commercial that depicts Obama as a monkey. Then again, I don't think anything can top this gem in terms of racism...



What the fuck was that even advertising for?

In short. All these ads can have one thing said about them...

The War On Peanuts

The War On Peanuts

This is just another fraction and war front on the war on Christmas. Either that or the Republicans are just insane, but they stated that Obama has declared a war on the Peanuts.

In the opinion of Arlington Mayor Russell Wiseman, President Barack Obama's speech on Tuesday night on the war in Afghanistan was deliberately timed to block the Christian message of the "Peanuts" television Christmas special.

Wiseman made the statements on his Facebook page, where he declared Obama to be a Muslim. Only people on Wiseman's "friend's list" had access to the post. He has more than 1,600 friends on Facebook.

"Ok, so, this is total crap, we sit the kids down to watch 'The Charlie Brown Christmas Special' and our muslim president is there, what a load.....try to convince me that wasn't done on purpose. Ask the man if he believes that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and he will give you a 10 minute disertation (sic) about it....w...hen the answer should simply be 'yes'...."

"A Charlie Brown Christmas," which first aired in 1965, has become an endearing program for many because of its emphasis on the "real meaning of Christmas," including Linus' memorable reading from the Gospel of Luke of Jesus' birth.

In Wiseman's extensive thread that attacked the president, his supporters and Muslims, he stated "...you obama people need to move to a muslim country...oh wait, that's America....pitiful."

At another point he said, "you know, our forefathers had it written in the original Constitution that ONLY property owners could vote, if that has stayed in there, things would be different........"

When contacted Thursday, Wiseman declined to comment about his Facebook posts.

"It's ridiculous for someone to send my Facebook post," Wiseman said. "You guys are trying to make a mountain out of a molehill."

As the popularity of social networking sites such as Twitter, MySpace and Facebook has increased, some organizations, such as some NFL teams, have banned the use of posting comments online because of inflammatory and embarrassing remarks that invariably make it into the public domain.

To avoid online controversies, Ellyn Angelotti, a faculty member at the Poynter Institute, said that everyone, not just public officials, must to be careful of what they post on the Internet.

"A lot of people think Facebook is private so only a limited number of people can see their post," Angelotti said. "But the reality is that it can be made public.

"You've got to be careful. The same social rules that apply in real life should be applied to the virtual life."

Good Grief! Buy the tape you freeloader!

I do like how the author of this article acts as though the problem is that the mayor got caught saying something silly and not that an elected official is completely fucking insane.



It's as if Charlie Brown and Muslims are Lucy and he just can't kick that damn football.. No wait, He's Charlie Brown, the football is Muslims.. Lucy represents liberals and Malcontents who, through trickery and deception, conspire to prevent real Americans from punishing the terrorist menace.

Let's see what the Facebook public thinks about this:

Poll: What do you think about Arlington Mayor Russell Wiseman’s comments about President Obama on Facebook?

His comments are inappropriate and embarrassing. 48% 4975
Mayor Wiseman speaks for a lot of Americans who are frustrated with the President. 43% 4493
I don’t agree with him, but he can say what he wants on his Facebook page. 7% 796
total votes: 10264

Ah yes, that's America... I'm sorry. But you have to remember that the Peanuts itself is part of the war on Christmas and Christianity. Linus, the only character who regularly quotes scripture, represents Christianity. His security blanket is a metaphor for the emotional crutch that is faith and the Great Pumpkin he believes in is the Flying Spaghetti Monster joke forty years earlier.



It's not like the Republicans even care about what Obama said. Most of the time it's really just like they're hearing one of the parents in the Peanuts universe as they talk in that strange "waaaaah waaamp womp waaah" language. What was up with that? Our childhood was filled with fucked up parental role models. You could never understand the adults in Peanuts and the muppets never showed Nanny above the knee.

No wonder we're so fucked up. Maybe it's a good thing that Obama preempted the broadcasting of this. Maybe the next generation wouldn't have such a fucked up image of our grown ups. I guess it's just a time honored tradition to watch the Peanuts Christmas Special. So we can't take that away from our children. It's bad enough we're leaving them with a huge national debt for the wars that we are raging. Though I have to say, Race for your life, Charlie Brown is the best of the bunch and doesn't get the respect it deserves.

Spongebob China Man

Sponge Bob China Man

With people driving to Walmarts in droves for the Holiday shopping, perhaps you should take a look at where your gifts are coming from in the form of this colorful cartoon about a Chinese Sponge Bob.



So maybe you'll buy American next time. Ha. Just messing. We can't produce anything worth a damn.

Turtles Forever!

Turtles Forever!

I have a confession to make, growing up I was a huge, and I mean HUGE Ninja Turtles fan. Watched all the episodes, got all the toys, even dressed as Raph (Raphael) for Halloween two years in a row. There was one time I even sneaked in pizza from Costco to a screening of the first Ninja Turtles flick. It was totally cool too!

So consider it a surprise when I wasn't too thrilled for all the new retellings of the Ninja Turtles through the last decade or so. To me, the 80's turtles cartoon was what kept me excited. So colorful and so comical. It was great. To my surprise, they made and will be releasing a sort of Ninja Turtle throw back for the 25th anniversary of the Ninja Turtles being created using all the turtles that have come to exist since then called Turtles Forever that comes out tomorrow.

New trailer for "TMNT" crossover film, "Turtles Forever."

The trailer for the new "TMNT" crossover movie, "Turtles Forever" has finally arrived and it looks fantastic!

Not only do the original animated Turtles appear, but their black and white comic book counterparts do as well.

In addition to the multiple versions of Turtles, "Turtles Forever," also features quite a few characters from the original animated series including Bebop and Rocksteady and even cameos by co-creators Eastman and Laird.

With the recent acquisition of the Ninja Turtles by Nickelodeon it's looking like "Turtles Forever" will be the last installment of "TMNT" the animated series and if the trailer is any indication, the folks over at 4Kids intend on going out with a bang.

"Turtles Forever" airs on Nov. 21st on the CW network, 9-10:30 Central.

The DVD of the film will be released later this year.

Here's the trailer for it:



It's a little strange to describe. It looks as if all the turtles from all the series make some sort of appearance. They even have the black and white ninja turtles from the original comic book. Now that in itself is pretty damn crazy to toss in considering how gritty and violent it was.

Apparently somewhere between the 80's and now the technology to draw curved lines and pupils was lost. I do wonder what Turtle Vision is. It's chilling down there with all the turtle-specific emblems in the bottom right of the image. Maybe Turtle Vision is like 3D but instead of being 3D it just makes everything look like the sewer?

Check out this clip from the upcoming episode with April in it:


Holy shit, April! That's some serious rack. I don't remember April's tits being this big. Maybe it's just my mind messing with me. But seriously? Was April always that busty? It's pretty crazy in that clip



Hmm, perhaps she was well stacked. It's no wonder that I have a thing for red/light brown haired girls. Damn you cartoons for shaping my fetishes! Though the yellow jumpsuit could be left out.



Hmm, I suppose they were. They were so big, in fact, that they made her drive not so good



It looks like they were pretty ridiculous in the videogames as well. A little fun facts for you, I bet you never realized that the Ninja Turtles fought against the Power Rangers Now that was a scary thing. But thinking about it now, maybe I liked the turtles because they made being green an every day thing..



It helps actually being green, of course.

And as much as I'm looking forward to this, and as many good memories I have as a kid growing up with these mutant turtles in a half shell, I still can feel proud that I'm not this person:

Venture Brothers Coming Soon

Venture Brothers

GO TEAM VENTURE! is going to be a catch phrase you'll be hearing pretty soon. The fourth season is set to come back as two sets of eight episodes, with the first eight scheduled for November 2009 and the remaining episodes likely airing Summer 2010.

While it's a wait between two month periods of venture brothers, it's still something to look forward to. It's been a good year since last we saw from the Venture compound. So perhaps a little sneak peak at the trailer for Season 4 will tickle your fancy:

The big superhero guy with the white tights and rainbows has got to be Captain Sunshine. He was mentioned in every season so far and it looks like he wants revenge on the Monarch. Careful viewers will remember that in "Return to Spider Skull Island" the incarcerated Monarch instructed 21 and 24 to "send the charred remains of Wonder Boy to his beloved Captain Sunshine!" Looks like those charred remains finally are catching up to the Monarch.

Season 4 looks awesome, the Venture Bros. always seems to go in unexpected directions and I end up loving it, so I for one can't wait.

GO TEAM VENTURE!

Goodbye Childhood Nickelodeon

Goodbye Childhood Nickelodeon

Looks like my childhood is now dead. Completely dead. You see Nickelodeon began as The Pinwheel Network in 1977, named after its flagship children's show, Pinwheel.


That show, while I was too young to even watch it, being that I was negative three years old, had an addicting theme song I would later find myself humming. So that I say Fuck you! Then after not being an educational programing channel, it went National in 1979 as Nickelodeon, and it feature this logo in a pinball.



Then in 1984, when I was old enough to not piss myself and actually give a shit about it, the logo changed to the now famous orange splat that we've come to know and love.



Now that the network has moved into a tween territory for some time, it's not really a surprise but Nick changed the logo. You see, in June 2009, the year of the network's 30th anniversary, Nickelodeon's DVD packaging and promotional material began featuring this new logo:


They sure did just slightly edit a well known font.



A part of me just died. Yup, my childhood is officially dead. Which is funny since I never understood why it was called Nickelodeon in the first place. I mean, I don't even know what that word meant. Something about me really dislikes re-branding of networks. It always feels like a vain attempt to stay hip and cool. For example, CNN headline news shortened itself to HLN. Why do you really need to shorthand Head Line News? I suppose in this case it's just a matter that there's no more gack.

I respect Coca-Cola for doing the one thing right and sticking with a single, recognizable logo design that has only slightly been refined over the years. It's still the same basic logo because it was so recognizable. Much like the Nickelodeon logo being pretty damn recognizable as well. It was indelibly imprinted in the minds of a lot of people when they were kids. Nostalgia aside, the "orange scribble/splat with the name" is embedded in pop culture pretty well. I can't think of a good reason to change it.

I suppose the times where a changing. Cartoon Network just changed its logo as well. You can just see it as The C.N. I mean, what the fuck does that even mean besides Cartoon Network. I know I haven't watched Nickelodeon in a long time. I suppose I shouldn't care anymore anyway. I don't see a reason why everything needs to be marketed to 12 year-old girls. Even if they have so much money to piss away, I don't see how it could be all that much of a market.

I guess it's a lot better than them shortening it to something crappy like NickReal so they could show crappy reality shows like Cartoon Network started doing. Nor did they go the SciFi method and just put fuckin' Y's in their name and call it NyCKyLyDyyN.

I suppose a network targeted at uneducated and often illiterate people has held on to a mouthful like "Nickelodeon" for this long. I'd have thought for sure it would have been truncated to NK or something stupid like that by now. But again, they must be learning something from Cartoon Network in that changing a great logo isn't beneficial in the slightest.

But then again, I shouldn't say that it killed my childhood. I'm tired of people claiming that something so abstract as a corporation choice "raped their childhood". Your childhood is in the past. You no longer HAVE a childhood to rape if you are not under 12. You just have memories and nostalgia and it is your choice as to whether they get altered. Your childhood does not get worse because the adult you witnesses something so tediously banal happening.

I remember watching Pete and Pete and if I remember enjoying it now I guess that no matter what logo they used, it wouldn't have changed the quality of the show. So I guess I'll just let it go. Let a logo die the death it was suppose to die.

Good bye old Nick Logo. Goodbye you beautiful bastard

Truth Is Stranger With Fiction...

Truth Is Stranger With Fiction...

I didn't feel like writing today. So enjoy a sample of fictitious characters come to life. You'll have nightmares on some of these cartoons/ fiction characters come to life...

The Future is scary..



It's time for Aaaaanimaiacs!



For me to poo on!



I sort of feel sorry for the bull. That has to be 5 minutes sold humiliation



Still doesn't make not wearing pants ok.



Ladies, watch your rings



Oh william street. you'll be well Representative in this blog



STRRRRONG BAD!



Pika pi?



Stealin' baskins since the break of dawn



Oh conkers!



They built a theme park for this guy?



Disturbing, I know.. but oh so cute.



How could I follow meatwad by anything less than Mastershake?



To be honest, he's waaaay older than an average teenage turtle.



I'll teach you to throw up another store at the mall!



Oh childhood cartoon memories.



I know this one is going to be tough.. Squidbillies



Fail... whale.



Ducks were very popular cartoon characters



What did I say?



Back to your poke-ball, you!



Was it dog cat or cat dog?



Stop, Chocula time!



Don't let it hug you



I miss my sega days



Yeah.. that's one awesome way to end this. Enjoy your nightmares.

I Just Wanna Be Loved By You. boop boop a doop

I Just Wanna Be Loved By You. Boop Boop Ba-oop!

Something came to my mind the other day and I'm really curious as to how feminist feel towards Betty Boop. Yes, that's right. I'm wondering what feminist feel about a cartoon character who simply sings about wanting to be loved by someone.



Why? I want some insight on feminist thought on Betty Boop, it is warranted because she is part of Americas history and is something I see a lot of females identifying with. Betty Boop was a flapper in her heyday. I understand this was a positive female role model back in the ‘girls place is in the kitchen’ times but now she is certainly a held as sex object. She may have been marginally positive some of the times


but certainly not always.


A common misconception about Betty Boop was that she was always her own woman, but in truth Betty Boop was a bitch first, quite literally. She was the girlfriend of Bimbo the Dog, Fleischer Studio’s answer to Mickey Mouse, where she first appeared in Dizzy Dishes and is almost unrecognizable.

Betty Boop increased in popularity and soon stole the show. But because she was ugly she was slowly given a makeover loosing the dog nose and ears until she was fully human, but Bimbo did not and so in a few episodes she was dating a dog.


Betty Boop is based off Helen Kane and she unsuccessfully sued for using her likeness. Betty Boop was intended to be a blond except she was in black and white cartoons, there was only one real colour cartoon of Betty Boop and in that she was red blond.


At the end of 1934 a standard of morality called the Hays Code was fully enforced on Betty Boop and most episodes post these events are pretty much worthless. Bimbo was banned due to bestiality; new characters Pudgy and Grampy were added and Betty wore longer dresses and got a nice hunky boyfriend called Freddy. This crippled the appeal of Betty and the show died a long death, until she was revived as an icon in the 50s.

So I have to wonder what exactly the view of Betty Boop was to all those who grab on to her image, like you do Tinkerbell and Hello Kitty.

Best Fleischer animation


it doesn’t say but she was a democrat. Now some more videos


Fleischer was Jewish, so I guess this is kosher?

Maybe.. Maybe not. I wont judge.


Though, Disney isn't free of this sort of talk. We all know Walt was an anti-semite. But who cares cause he brought us the wonders of a talking mouse. I bring you Trader Mickey.

Ahhh, racism..

Go Animated Joe!

Go Animated Joe!

In what is the most interesting turn of events, crazy comic writer Warren Ellis wrote a new animated G.I. Joe cartoon. Which seems as an odd thing. I recently made a trek into watching my old childhood favorite cartoons since they started showing up on DVD. They were all pretty terrible. So the news of G.I. Joe Resolute is pretty interesting

G.I. Joe: Resolute is an animated series based on the G.I. Joe franchise, written by Warren Ellis and produced by Sam Register.[1] The series will be released online as ten 5-minute episodes and one 10-minute final episode. These episodes will then form an hour-long movie. The movie is scheduled for broadcast on Teletoon in Canada on April 24 as part of post 9 pm programming block, Teletoon Detour and on Cartoon Network on April 24, 2009. It will be directed by Joaquim Dos Santos.

If you've ever read anything by Warren Ellis, the man is pretty graphic. He also likes to toss in all the future tech WMD stuff. Particle beams and all that crazy shit. It's all either based on existing military projects or speculative science, he loves that crap.



We should get it out there early. The whole thing's an outlet to promote and sell a line of toys. You're better off understanding that up front. Once upon a time there was a "G.I. Joe" soldier character, and later on the line evolved to describe an entire squad of varied military almost-stereotype characters.

The idea of G.I. Joe and Cobra being actual characters in a story owes most to the work of Larry Hama, who wrote most of the G.I. Joe comic books, starting when Marvel Comics had the license and continuing through it being traded between smaller-press comics publishers. It's had a continuity that's been rebooted at least twice, once to coincide with a new toy line and one to ape "anime style" cartoons thought to be popular. This current one actually seems a lot closer to the comic books.



Unlike the cartoons, the old comic books had a lot of death in them. They didn't use laser beams as bullets and they actually hit their target every now and then. In a sense, this cartoon is a true version of G.I. Joe. Especially closer to a realistic view of the modern style of combat.

So Adult Swim will be showing the entire 90 minutes of this with ads on Saturday night/Sunday Morning but you can see G.I. Joe Resolute on Adult Swim's website broken into 5 minute segments right now.

I posted the first few episodes here so you can get a taste of it.

Episode 1


Episode 2


Episode 3


You can find the rest over at Adult Swim's Website

Yes, it's everything you've ever wanted in a GI Joe cartoon. Screw the live action movie, this is the GI Joe everyone wanted to see. I know what you're thinking. What could be more American than turning a popular 80's show into anime? The animation seems to be done by the same company that worked on The Boondocks. The whole thing sounded retarded and even with Ellis, I was skeptical but once watching it, I'm pretty damn excited.

I'm going to go against the grain here. I don't give a shit about Snake Eyes. Yeah, he's a ninja. Do you really see a lot of ninja's in the armed forces? Fuck that douche. Even worse is that Ray Park is playing him in the movie and everyone seems to be drooling over this very short actor who had a whole zero lines in Star Wars because his voice sucks and was killed off quickly. Way to fuckin' go, you douche. And while his intro to this cartoon on Cobra island is pretty kick ass, it's still the same ol' shit of ninja vs. generic troopers. Hey, how about we step away from the stereotype Anime shit.



You have to love the fact that for once Cobra Commander actually committed a real terrorist act without fucking it up. Maybe that was the entire appeal of this. G.I. Joe introduced a generation of 80's kids to the idea of a "Terrorist force bent on conquering the world". Shit, they buttered us up to actually being open to accept this stupid War on terror shit.

We weren't so scared of the word back then. No wonder they tossed it around a kids show so easlier. I guess that's why this cartoon cranks it up a notch. If you were going to tell the story about a global bad guy group and call them terrorists, you'd really have to top 9/11. Least we never forget what happened then.



The whole process of destroy shit and bumping this up to 11 on the crazy notch seems pretty interesting. If you're a fan of Warren Ellis, you should read this, too.

Warren Ellis said:

The people at Hasbro were actually remarkably supportive. And I did apologise after shouting at them those times. And they did give me one of those conversations that you never really expect to have when growing up:

HASBRO: No, Warren, you cannot wipe Beijing from the face of the earth.

ME: Shit. (pause) What about Moscow?

HASBRO: Wiping Moscow from the face of the earth would be fine

Yeah, I would have liked to have been a fly in that room. They're even making a way to import silly characters like shipwreck into the crowd. Sure, they kill Bazooka in the first episode without having him blow up a single thing and they make it so that Road Block doesn't rhyme whatever he's saying anymore. But those are losses that can be accepted. Collateral damage, so to speak. I really don't know how they would have done Ice Cream Soldier into this anyway. That's even a task too big for Ellis.

The Day After Earth Day

The Day After Earth Day

Well, it's done with. Earth day is a thing of yesterday. You can actually go back to your wasteful ways now. I mean, it's not like Earth day was partially created by a murderer. The fella's name is Ira Einhorn and he's laying claim to helping found the whole concept behind Earth day.

I say we stop telling people to save this fucking planet, we're doomed, people are generally worthless and don't deserve to survive beyond what we're heading to. We're only making it so that the time humans survive on this planet gets shorter and shorter. So maybe it is a good thing that we have a holiday to teach the kids how to take care of the planet. But what will the listen to?



Oh yeah, TV. Kids love that shit. They sit in front of the boob tube and watch cartoons all day. Back in my day we had Captain Planet. But Captain Planet was horrible TV. You had terribly characters calling for the planet's power to save them when they were in trouble. Way to pass the buck there. Constantly fighting with a pollution rat trying to get pollution down to zero. How is that sharing this planet with everyone?

Then again now in retrospect the entire cast of characters were gross stereotypes and it attempted to be 'diverse' by just stereotyping everyone and everything in its path, regardless of color. I love how the South American had a goofy "mystic" power that was completely useless and was basically the retarded sidekick of the American.


Dr. Blight is my favorite eco-villain. She always seemed so enthusiastic about things and wasn't as gross as that rat guy.

*She develops a laser to turn the spirit of earth into a homeless person*
*She cuts down the Tree of Life, turning a reservation into a superfund site in the process*
*She goes back in time and sells nukes to Hitler*



Surprisingly, eco-villainy was just her back-up career. She used to test nerve gas on humans, but quit after accidental exposure horrifically scarred the left side of her face.

Perhaps the best Captain Planet episode was the one where the American brought peace to Northern Ireland. I think half of Belfast is blown up in the episode or something.

Yeah, good luck with that peace shit, homie.

I guess no one has considered that Captain Planet is almost singlehandedly responsible for the resistance towards widespread nuclear power.

Besides, it's not like people were actually afraid of nuclear power if it wasn't for such hate done by Captain Planet. Sure, the China syndrome may have freaked some people out but the fact that I have to explain the China syndrome right now means it wasn't THAT big of a shit. What the China syndrome calls for is that it'll eat through the fuckin' earth and create a hole all the way to china.



Has anyone thought of the negative attention caused by Earth day. All those stupid conservatives that declare that they will leave all their lights on all day and idel their car for hours and crank their heat and their A/C up all to be counter culture.

Normally, those of us with sanity sit Earth Day out, while schools frighten kids with apocalyptic tales of the earth being destroyed, because we enjoy a high standard of living. Nothing escapes blame -- the cars we drive, the kind of light bulbs we use, or even the kind of bags we shop with.


Don't make this Indian cry.

While it's nice to not be wasteful when shopping, I doubt the reusable shopping bags have that much of an impact. In fact, I doubt we are looking at ourselves a bit to proudly in thinking that we have the power to destroy this planet. We have done a lot to save the people of earth. That's about it. Long after we are dead the planet will be here. Be it a bit warmer because the sun is closer. But it'll be here in its pure form.

Earth day is not about saving the planet. It's about keeping rent control in place. If we screw around with the environment then it'll create a difficult system that we'll live in. The recycling and all the reusing of materials is great for the sole purpose of keeping things better. So when trying to educate your children about Earth day, focus on aspiring greatness in keeping that status quo, those cooler temps and the ice caps to a level that we can live on. To continue the legacy of having animals not go extinct.


This one, I suppose you can make cry.