Friday, January 28, 2011

J.D. Salinger is Dead

J.D. Salinger is Dead

Today is the anniversary of J.D. Salinger's death. It's not like we're going to miss him much. I mean, it's not like he was much of a public figure or anything.

Wrote Catcher in the Rye and then sunk away to living a life in seclusion. Not much really to say about it after that. But man, has it been a year already? But man, is that not one of those popular books. I can't wait for another couple of decades before we start censoring shit out of that book.

The part where he hires a hooker but chickens out and just wants to talk to her.. Man, that sure was... stupid. Hookers aren't good at talking. If they were they wouldn't keep putting things in there to shut them up...

I have to admit that I found the book to be boring and fairly stupid. Though you'd always find it on people's list as their favorite book because it's one of three books they remember reading over the course of their life. The other two being Fountainhead and Goodnight Moon.

Ha, just kidding. Like anyone actually reads Fountainhead that isn't a hardcore republican.

More than likely the Great Gatsby and To Kill a Mockingbird are the favorite books for people who have not read books. Plug in Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance if they're trying extra hard to be deep and meaningful.

I do admit that To Kill a Mockingbird is a pretty good book for kids to read. Atticus is a cool dad and all old and full of wisdom and shit. You want my critique of the book? It's 2 ill a mockingbird.

Maybe the appeal of Catcher is that people generally identify with a self centered protagonist who's projecting to the reader his first sampling of existential angst.

It's probably a much different book when one realizes that the reason I didn't like it in high school was that I was the exact kind of shitty whiny bitch Holden Caulfield is. Then again, that's every teenager ever. Though I was a bit self aware of what exactly I was... a complete and total shitty brat.

Maybe I'm not giving it enough credit. Perhaps I wouldn't think it's much shit if I try reading it again now that I'm older and it's not something close to home. Though maybe Catcher in the Rye is a book we only read because our parents liked it. You just watch, our children will study the works of Twilight and Harry Potter as if it was some sort of mystical new venture into mythology.

Or maybe you were simply never assigned Catcher in the Rye in school. Maybe you were assigned The Scarlet Letter. Let me get you in on a secret... that was complete shit as well. Want an example of how that's not a great read as a teen? Rent Easy A. It's the 10 Things I hate About You of classic works redone to film without all the Heath Ledger overdosing shit.

Either way, if you liked that book perhaps you should just kill John Lennon and then kill yourself.

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