Yo Momma!

Yo Momma!

This is your friendly reminder for you to call your mom today. Why? Cause it's Mommy's day, you sniveling baby! Oh, what am I saying, you should respect your momma!



Why? Well need I remind you that mothers are doubly exploited. Once at the capitalist workplace and again in the feudal household. So what's the original of praising your mom?

The first attempts to establish a "Mother's Day" in the U.S. were mostly marked by women's peace groups.[1] A common early activity was the meeting of groups of mothers whose sons had fought or died on opposite sides of the American Civil War. There were several limited observances in the 1870s and the 1880s but none achieved resonance beyond the local level.[2]

In 1868 Ann Jarvis created a committee to establish a "Mother's Friendship Day" whose purpose was "to reunite families that had been divided during the Civil War", and she wanted to expand it into an annual memorial for mothers, but she died in 1905 before the celebration became popular.[2][3] Her daughter Anna Jarvis would continue her mother's efforts.

In New York City, Julia Ward Howe led a "Mother's Day" anti-war observance on June 2, 1872,[1][2][4] which was accompanied by a Mother's Day Proclamation. The observance continued in Boston for about 10 years under Howe's personal sponsorship, then died out.[5]

Several years later a Mother's Day observance on May 13, 1877 was held in Albion, Michigan over a dispute related to the temperance movement.[6] According to local legend, Albion pioneer Juliet Calhoun Blakeley stepped up to complete the sermon of the Rev. Myron Daughterty who was distraught because an anti-temperance group had forced his son and two other temperance advocates to spend the night in a saloon and become publicly drunk. From the pulpit Blakeley called on other mothers to join her. Blakeley's two sons, both traveling salesmen, were so moved that they vowed to return each year to pay tribute to her and embarked on a campaign to urge their business contacts to do likewise. At their urging, in the early 1880s, the Methodist Episcopal Church in Albion set aside the second Sunday in May to recognize the special contributions of mothers.

Frank E. Hering, President of the Fraternal Order of Eagles, made the first known public plea for "a national day to honor our mothers" in 1904.[7][8]

So while you can say FUCK MOMS, someone already beat you to it. For you see, if someone didn't fuck moms then you wouldn't have been born.

Did I just blow your fucking mind? Boooyah!



You have to admit that raising a child full time is one of the most meaningful endeavors in life, it's a shame that our society views it not as a job but as an obligation of women to work as slaves.

Then again, raising a child full time is one of the most grueling endeavors in life that no one should be allowed to or forced to go into without a full social support.



Perhaps for all these reasons you should call your mom today and chat for a few minutes before you hang up and not talk to her for another month or two. I mean, chances are they're some crazy hoarder of stupid trinkets that could be found on QVC. Speaking of which, did you even get her anything?

Oh well. Fuck it.