Monday, July 27, 2009

U2 Loves Money

U2 Loves Money

I saw a new ad for the Blackberry the other day and I was pretty much shocked.. Ok, maybe not shocked. I mean, I should be used to this sort of shit, right? Well. It's U2 going after the mighty dollar once again. The ad goes on with U2 singing in the dark about how each generation gets a new chance to blah blah blah and all that. What bothers me about all this is that it's an ad for a god damn cell phone.

You see that shit? Blackberry Loves U2. It's only a shame that U2 doesn't love Blackberry. How could you be in love with something when your heart already belongs to something else. You may be thinking the environment or changing the world, right? Nope. Money. U2 LOVES MONEY.

Yeah yeah, they bring so much awareness to conditions and situations in Africa and other such tragedies.. but how many times can you beg people to donate money while you're out there sleeping in beds and beds of money. Hey U2, you have a lot of cash. I bet if you just donated half of the album earnings to a foundation, it would be 10x's more than all the money you were able to squeeze out of others donating.

They also have this case of caring about the environment. Well, at least they say they do. Did you see that stage they had in the ad. That huge one that looked like a giant claw? Well, that's the new stage set up for this tour. Take note that the environmentalist, humanitarian and pop deity Bono is on tour right now using that monstrosity. And I say monstrosity because if there was a carbon footprint attached to it, the thing would be the size of Texas. Which I'm sure they will stop and tour in sometime during the tour.

Let me just emphasize the fact that it takes 120 trucks to transport this thing. 120 semis in a convoy would stretch over a mile of road. Ok, maybe I should dumb that down some for most Americans that can't really visualize things via miles so I'll use a more standardized unit, like foot fields. It's exactly .88 football fields worth of truck cargo. If you parked 120 of those trailers on a football field, packed solid with the sides touching and neglecting the tractors, they would fill it from the back of one end zone to the opposite 3-yard.

I don't get why anyone would even go to a U2 concert these days. They fucking suck. Yeah, sure. They did some more-or-less innovative stuff with rock music 25 years ago, but who the fuck gives a shit about them now other than your parents? All they do now a days is play bland boring middle age white guy rock and it's beyond hypocritcal to even talk about the 3rd world of the environmental changed when you're lugging around a stage that takes 120 trucks to haul.

So the next time you see Bono out there giving you a lecture on saving the world, just remember how they're doing a bang up job of making sure they negate all their effort.

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