GO AWAY, SECOND MONDAY!
I mean, no one likes you! What a rip off! Here we all were blowing stuff up, eating good hot dogs and talkin bout how great America is and now we're back to work. We already had a Monday this week and it sucked as it got in the way between a weekend and the 4th by two whole days. Now you're telling me that I need to drudge along this work place for two more just to make it to the weekend?
No fair. I call foul. Ain't nobody got time for a second Monday. It should totes be against the law that one week could have two of them. I thought we were making America great again. Not like this, Not like this at all!
So what's the solution here? I mean, we already had one Sunday this week. That crushing feeling like the weekend is already over and you'll have to go back to the grind the next day. I don't even want to think about how soul crushing it'll be when Sunday part 2 happens in a few days. At the very least that one comes with the enjoyment that we'll have a Saturday to enjoy all up in there. Not like yesterday's Sunday, which totally didn't have any sort of build up and was just some coke binge of a weekend all in one day.
This is why everyone hates these mid week holidays. It just throws the whole goddamn system off. If it was only one day in either direction, it would have been so perfect. Then folks can make that elusive 4 day weekend either way they went with it. Now only the shady of shady folks will just try to go for the greedy level of a 9 day weekend. Something that is so rarely pulled off that you would have to be a little nuts to try.
I get it, you can't control when the fourth of July lands. It's the actual date and you can't just move the birthday of your country's independence... or can you? I know this is just some second Monday morning quarter backing, but why the fuck didn't we just do that?
We should have just celebrated it a few days early. Or shit, I know this is just going to sound crazy to you, but much like how most white women do with their birthday, why the fuck did we not celebrate it for the whole entire month of July? Come on, I know those crazy Europeans have a summer break from life. I mean, not much of a life when you're drinking wine all day and insulting American tourist, but you know, like they do. We should just close up America for the entire month of July - Not in the way of not allowing folks in or out, but I mean, you know, just say we'll be back in 15 minutes sort of smoke break in the back alley. I feel like as a whole with the news from the last couple of weeks, we could really use that moment or two to collect ourselves and just go "Why are we like this?"
Then, you know, continue to eat our hot dogs and burgs, blow shit up and just get back to it all refreshed come August.. Ain't nobody got time for this sort of mad rush weekend in a day in the middle of the week sort of situation that we just had to go through.
So yeah, think about it. Maybe we'll try it next year. Until then, just try to get through this goddamn second Monday with your sanity and realize that we have at least a second Friday tomorrow. Which I mean, isn't the best since Friday is just build up anticipation towards the weekend, Something special that comes after a long five days of a week... now.... sort of cheapened by the fact that we just had it yesterday.
I'm just all sorts of confused right now.