Sunday, October 17, 2010

Men That Are Mad - Consume!

Men That Are Mad Compel You To Consume

You must consume.. because you are a consumer! Duh. That's what the whole show is about - these guys finding a way to market whatever they have to you.

So tonight was the season finale of another pretty entertaining season of Mad Men. If you weren't up to speed... Well, the episode had very little to do with the actual plot point of the rest of the season build up and we got no resolution on the whole "Will the company be saved?", so it's sort of pointless to bother catching you up.

Those of you who watched the preview last week probably still had no idea what this season finale was going to be about. Then again, that's the case every week. Mad Men's previews have got to be some of the worse. Can you actually tell what the next episode would be about based on the one or two random lines and jump edit cuts? You get no context for the phrases. You might as well make shit up.

But this episode was completely out of left field. It resolved California stuff.. in a sense. We found out that Jane's boobs are getting bigger.. Oh yeah, and I guess as a result she's also preggo's. But again - THEY'RE BIGGER!

Which comes as a surprise to many. Alan Sepinwall usually talks to Matthew Weiner after each season finale to post-mortem it. This time, Weiner was only available for about 15 minutes.


Before anybody had seen the finale.

I thought I heard a faint scream coming from the direction of New Jersey. Quote of the decade:
There's been a lot of speculation ever since the episode where Joan goes to the abortion clinic over whether or not she actually did it. Obviously, you don't want to spoil it if it comes up in the finale, but did you intend for it to be as ambiguous as many people have taken that storyline?

No. I really didn't. But you have to watch the show. I don't have control over what people see. That is a perfect example of people bringing what they want to bring to the show. And Joan is so strong that we know that whatever decision she made, she made that decision and it's good for her. But you do have to watch. I'm not going to say there is no ambiguity to the event; I just didn't know that people would interpret it the way they did.

What made this even funnier was that, at least initially, Sepinwall was fairly firmly convinced that Joan had the abortion.

I guess it put to rest the whole concept of the abortion. Which should put a lot of people's bitching to rest that are both Pro-life/Pro-Choice. I do have one thing I have to say though, I'm still Pro-fashion and I'm tired of people trying to... um. mimic the show.

We all see that the characters carry the outfits of the time well, but that's no reason why you should attempt tossing your body into the ring. Even if they did release a sort of Style Guide to dressing like what your average Mad Men character would dress like back in that era. There's actually been a lot of style/Fashion guides as to how to dress like they do at the Ad Agency.

You people need to just stop it. As a proud owner of a couple of different fedoras I can honestly say that YOU SHOULD NOT GO NEAR ONE! Never put it on your head. By no means can you possibly ever hope to bring back the fedora look. Not even Indiana Jones had a chance in hell in making the fedoras any cooler or remotely possible of being brought back to fashion. While I love the ones I have I know full well that they should never be put on my head and taken into the outside world.

What I'm saying is you should stop trying to be Don Draper. Why? Because it's a simple matter of you not even having the basics that make up Don Draper. You're not even a fraction of cool as he is. Besides, it's not like you want to be Don Draper anyway. He stole a guy's name and is a complete asshole to people - not to mention an alcoholic. He's probably the last person you'd want to aspire to be like.

I mean, I realize the urge. Don Draper just oozes that cool - everything a dude wants to be. What with his ability to get hussies with a couple of words. He walks around in cool, well fitted suits. But guess what, you probably can't handle your alcohol that is aged 16-20 years. But face it. You'll never be them. You'll never be Roger Sterling at some night club and you're never going to be even that pretentious bearded guy who loved that old chick who died earlier this season.

You know why you can't be like that? Because you're not Jon Hamm. John Hamm has that charisma that you will never have, not even in your most alcohol fueled haze. It just isn't going to happen.. So STOP!

Most of all, the main reason why you will not ever be like Don, and shouldn't try is because.. IT'S NOT 1962. You're world, is not his world and it hasn't been for a good 50 years. Don doesn't face going on Xbox live or pre-ordering Fables III.

You look really foolish wearing the clothing. Especially when your normal 9-5 is at some walmart or some call center. There's a reason why there's white and blue collars to separate the classes. Those who wear the white ones look odd wearing something the blue ones would wear. Those who were the blue collars look completely unnatural with what the white ones. And those of you who wear fucking video game, threadless or regular t-shirts have no business wearing a suit. Ever.

I guess the hope now is that the show is done for the season, we wont have to deal with these extremely strange clothing choices for another year because those of you trying to pull off the look... just stop. It's not working for you to go through your dad's closet.

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