Monday, March 14, 2011

I Left My Heart In San Francisco. The Foreskin, I Kept With Me.

I Left My Heart In San Francisco. The Foreskin, I Kept With Me.

Tony Curtis once sang that he left his heart in San Francisco. It was a touching song but I have to wonder if it was now when he performed it would he be talking about a different body part being left.. or not left behind in the city of smugness?

Let's face it.. you can leave your heart in San Francisco, but you'll potentially not be able to leave your foreskin there soon...
Self-described "civil rights advocates" say that a ballot proposition to ban circumcision is on track for gathering signatures, meaning that San Franciscans may vote on the measure this November.

The proposed law is being spearheaded by local resident Lloyd Schofield, according to the San Francisco Examiner.

It's part of a national push to end the procedure, which some say is steeped in tradition but poses risks and has little medical benefit. The American Academy of Pediatrics and the American Medical Association do not recommend routine circumcision.

Getting on the ballot is the easy part -- only about 7,000 signatures are required. Once it's there, advocates will have to convince voters that snipping off body parts is a bad idea.

Although some studies indicate that circumcision reduces the risk of STD transmission, others have indicated that the procedure is not worth the associated risks and diminished sexual function.

Several Jewish organizations have weighed in against the ban as well, pointing out that circumcision rituals play an important historical role for many Jews. Schofeld counters that under his proposed law, adults would be free to opt-in to circumcision, but infants would not be allowed to have the procedure until they reach 18.

If it passes, those caught cutting foreskins would face a fine of $1,000 and a year in prison. Only people over the age of 18 would be allowed to have their foreskins removed.

I just have to say, having a strange turtle necked disturbing dog dick is not some sort of universal right. In fact, I have no problem that when I was young, they took mine away. Yeah, a little bit TMI, but guess what, it's topical.

At least I haven't gotten into how my circumcised penis is vajazzled. Now that would be both creatively remarkable as well as fashionable for the time. To be honest, this all feels like Obama is simply forcing kids to have ugly ass snuffalupugus looking dicks.

I really don't care that circumcisions are mainly performed by 1st year OB/Gyn residents who have almost no training or experience in the field. I don't mind that urologists won't do it and more senior residents consider it beneath them. The fact of the matter is that we don't need someone sticking up for all the white babies in San Francisco in their quest to have a dirty dick.

Because that's what it comes down to. Most Americans can't even take care of themselves, let alone their kid's foreskins. How do you expect them to teach them proper methods of cleaning their uncircumcised dicks?

But hey, this proposed law is being spearheaded... hee. I have to admit, my dick would be completely run of the mill if not for the circumcision scars. They really give it a character and I feel that without it, it would just be another face covered in skin..

Hey ladies, I'm less sexually sensitive so you know what that means? I can go 4 minutes instead of 3! Booooyah!

On the heels of this proposal we probably should do away with other controversial and painful medical procedures with permanent long term effects. You know, such as vaccinations given out to infants. Fuck those cultural trends! I say let them decide for themselves on if they want to be vaccinated against childhood diseases when they hit the right legal age of 18.

But hey, at least this whole thing is actually bringing the Muslims and the Jews to put all their differences aside and pull together in order to mutilate children's genitalia with religious immunity!
SAN FRANCISCO: Jewish and Muslim groups are mobilising over an attempt to outlaw male circumcision in San Francisco by putting the issue to a popular vote.

A self-described ''intact-ivist'', Lloyd Schofield, has been collecting signatures for a voter initiative that would criminalise infant circumcision in the Californian city.

After two months of collecting names, he claims to be more than halfway towards obtaining the 7168 signatures he needs by late April to put the matter on a ballot to be held in November.
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Mr Schofield and a growing community of anti-circumcision activists say infants should not be forced to participate in what is essentially culturally accepted genital mutilation.

They claim the procedure can cause health risks and diminished sexual function and compare it to the clitoridectomies performed on girls in parts of Africa.

''This is a human rights issue,'' he said. ''What you're doing is you're taking an infant and removing the most sensitive part of their body.''

Jewish organisations have pledged to fight the measure should it be placed on the ballot. The director of the Anti-Defamation League, Daniel Sandman, called Mr Schofield's effort discriminatory and misguided. ''This is hurtful and offensive to people in the community who consider this a coveted ritual,'' he said.

Abby Porth of the Jewish Community Relations Council charged Mr Schofield with wasting city resources for an inappropriate political stunt that was unlikely to become law.

''This is one of the most fundamental practices to our tradition of over 3000 years,'' she said. ''It's symbolic of our covenant with God.''

Ms Porth said the Jewish community would form a coalition against the initiative with medical professionals and Muslims, who also practise circumcision.

''It's very similar to those of the Jewish faith,'' said Omar Nawaz of Zaytuna College, a Muslim college in the San Francisco Bay area.

''It's a religious tradition and it's important for us.''

If the ban is approved, those caught cutting the foreskins of infants and other minors would face up to a year in jail and a fine of $US1000.
I mean, let's not forget that circumcised men are less likely to get HPV , Sorry about the higher risk of STD's, foreskin folks!

Though I do have to question why god, who it is said to have created us in his own image, would leave something he wanted off of us, on us. I can just image him saying something like:

"Oh shit, Man, I forgot to finish your dicks. Could you cut that last bit off for me? Thanks."

But you have to admit, it is a valid argument. Though let's just take god out of the equation. I think the problem here is that people see the act of cutting as something terrible wrong. Put this situation in its place..
"this would look better in its natural form, as a shapeless slab of cold marble"
-- anti-circumcision idiot, while looking at david, michelangelo's masterpiece

In short, I don't have to ever think about cleaning my hidden dank stinky dick skin because I'm cut. I don't remember feeling any pain when it got done because I was still too early to remember shit. So really, let those who want to slash off a little penis, slash off a little penis.

Let those who do it for religious, sick fun or whatever other reason keep on doing it.

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