Thursday, October 23, 2008

It Was The Best Of Times, It Was The Worse Of Times

It Was The Best Of Times, It Was The Worse Of Times

Google has done a terrible thing.

Though Google's corporate motto is "Don't be evil" they've released a terrible, sinful evil unto the world this past week. As part of the celebration of the search engine's tenth anniversary Google is making available their earliest index from January 2001, and it has the potential to turn our modern Internet world upside down.

It was a simpler, more optimistic Internet back then, when a search for VRML resulted in "VRML: The next big thing!" not "VRML: What went wrong?" On Internet 2001, searching for "Facebook" results in information about actual facebooks. "MySpace" refers to web hosting companies. "YouTube" returns zero results, the way it should be.

Wow. It's amazing how far logos have come.

When I type in Blogosphere it comes back with no returns. As you can see it was a simple time, it was a better time. 9/11 was nothing more than a reminder to watch Dr. Laura's TV show and Obama comes up with very few results. McCain even comes back as being seen as a maverick and there's not a single mention of Sarah Palin. Miracles of miracles.

Internet 2001 wasn't perfect. But when I discovered that Internet 2001 only returns 6 results for "Ebaum's World" and Internet 2008 returns nearly 4 million, I wanted to bash my head in. In remembering this old Internet I've fallen into an equally old habit. I've started drinking again. Four years of sobriety down the drain. Thanks Google.

God help you if you've ever posted anything embarrassing on the Internet before 2001. Today those results are buried underneath hundreds of millions of links to other nonsense, but not on Internet 2001. They are right on top of the shitheap. Your old Geocities page doesn't exist anymore, but chances are that the Internet Archive is holding a copy for your friends to find. Your Pokemon hentai fanart gallery is about to become very popular again. I know my poor attempts of a website still linger out there waiting to be released when I'm good and famous as a reminder of those early years of Geocities and going into AOLchat rooms acting like a complete fool.

Internet 2001 is a topsy turvy world where a search for porn seems a bit surreal. Sure you don't get the contrast you would if you popped in some 70's porn and got an afro in your face, but there's a bit of innocence to 2001 porn. Back then, 1 girl and 1 cup was the standard. It's clear that we have been desensitized to the point where we can't get off unless something strange and abnormal happens. I weep for the future generations and what they need in order to get their rocks off.

And considering this is what wikipedia was back then, I just have to question how we ever wrote any book reports as a kid. And how could we go about and not make note that it was 7 years ago that Chinese Democracy came out. Oh wait.. that never happened. Then again there's a lot of things that didn't. Duke Nukem forever still gets an eerily similar result in the search. All of which have it pointing as vaporware.

With all this retrospect into the past it's hard not to linger on those yesteryears. Moments past, roads traveled and then looked back on. Situations and choices made. All that jazz that could crush a person if they aren't careful. There's many times in my life where I'm sure I would be a different person if I chose a different path. Often I went down the one less traveled, other times I went down the one everyone seemed to go on.

We shouldn't question ourselves or our choices. The passion that drove us to those choices should be something we respect and admire. It defines you as an individual. As that unique snow flake that you constantly were told you are as a child. To feel contempt or regret for ones motivations should be the thing that people should feel guilt over.

I then run into this article, which just strengthens my thoughts.

Woman celebrates 105th birthday, pure and simple

AS A child growing up in New Zealand, Clara Meadmore had a hunch she would never have sex. Today, as she celebrates her 105th birthday in a nursing home in Cornwall, that belief has been proved right as she makes headlines as the world's oldest virgin.

Daily exercise, moderate drinking and not smoking have all been championed for people living long lives, but Miss Meadmore is adamant her secret is abstaining from sex. "I imagine there is a lot of hassle involved, and I have always been busy doing other things," she said. "I've never had a boyfriend. I've never been bothered about relationships."

Having emigrated to New Zealand with her family when she was 12, Miss Meadmore abstained from sex because it was frowned on unless people were married. She has never owned a television, and says she has filled her time with reading, gardening, cooking and listening to the radio.
I'm left wondering.. Why? Why would you deny yourself life. Why would you not attempt to try everything in life. Yeah, sure you lived a long life. But ask yourself if you've lived a full life. Not to mention that this goes against the whole point of Darwinism. It's not a lack of sex that has kept her living to a ripe old age, it's her genes. Those very same genes that have not been past on to anyone that contain the building blocks for a long life span. Way to be greedy there, old lady.

In looking at my life and the mistakes I've made and the choices I've made, I'm glad. I'm excited that I learned from them and I'm beyond thrilled that I survived this long. I'm constantly learning, always expanding. Much like google, at one point the search results were few and as you can tell from google 2001, vastly different than google in 2008.

Enjoy the here and now. Learn to make the best out of those mistakes you make and learn something from them. It's all part of a life experience that teaches you to be the person you are today. Start living because you already started dying. Best enjoy every minute of every day you have offered to you.

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