Sunday, February 21, 2010

Curling Gender Roles

Curling Gender Roles

While I don't give a flying fuck about the Olympics and I really don't care about national pride, I did flip through the channels of my television the other night and I some how landed on Curling. The first thing that one would try to comprehend is what exactly is the rules, or the point of this event, but I was fixated on the larger issues -namely why they have to separate this by gender.

Why is there a men's and women's events for this? Is it because of the Patriarchy being terrified of being bested by a woman? It's not like strength or agility has any real baring with curling. I also realized I haven't really said much in terms of misogynistic lately.. Okay, that Valentine's stuff doesn't count cause, it's Valentine's and well, that's massively unfavorably for women to begin with. Besides, this message is actually about equality and leveled playing field.

Could it possibly be that boobs make the big puck thing go 14% faster? And that's for the pair. It's roughly 7% per tit. Gynecomastia does help, but not as much as original girl tits. Tranny tits do a little better. The highest boost recorded was a Swede with 38E's who managed a full 17% faster than the amount of kinetic energy she put into her push. No one really knows why this works but the Soviets suspected magnets.

Maybe it's because women would lose every single goddamn time like in any other pursuit of human excellence and "feminist" would find it embarrassing and hard to explain when they can't claim hormonal disadvantage like in the more physical sports. Hmm, fuck. This paragraph seems to contradict the last one, but maybe you should take what I say as sarcasm.

Perhaps it just comes down to a separation of events so that it means more gold medals the US can win unfairly. But it's actually an interesting question when related to other sports and games. shooting, Chess, Archery, Motor racing, Horse riding.. well, motor racing isn't separated by genders there's just no good female drivers because women can't drive patriarchy

I could have gone the easy route in poking fun of this and saying that they're separated because it's actually an unfair advantage for women. I mean, yeah, it's 50-80 pound stone being tossed, but the real challenge in curly seems to be the sweeping to slow the stone down before the target.. and let's face it, women have a far bigger advantage when it comes to rapid sweeping...

Then again women even fail at the stuff they're expected and encouraged by society to be good at when men enter the field. My example: Culinary arts. How many Iron Chef's are women? And even the one they do have seems to lose every time I see her get called up for a challenge

From what I could gather, the only difference between the two genders in Curly is that men get much more curl on the stone due to greater arm strength. I guess that rules out my other theory that it's to prevent dudes from looking up the skirts of those Danish curling ladies. But still, I'm sure if only the non-physical sports weren't separate by gender we'd surely see that women can be just as good.

Here's a fun fact: Shooting events in the summer Olympics were mixed until fairly recently. There appears to be a trend where mixed competition lasted until a woman won a medal. Then either women were barred from competing in that particular event, or they were given their own event that was "easier" and had different scoring so that men's butts wouldn't be hurt as much.

damn, stylin

What I'm trying to say is that most men are sensitive babies who can't stand the shame of losing to a more skilled competitor (who happens to be a woman) so they try to make it as hard as possible to compare the two accurately while framing ladies sports as gentler or easier.

So see, to my female readership, I may have started with a little bit of snarky comments towards women, but in the end I show that men and women can compete with each other on equal playing fields, and as a feminist myself, I'm all about making sure that the playing field is as equal as possible. That's why I make fun so much. Because I would openly mock anyone the same way. Equality.

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