Thursday, February 11, 2010

Judging Judy

Judging Judy

Did you know that Judge Judy makes twenty times more than all the supreme court justices put together? Yup, that's right.

Combined annual salary of Supreme Court Justices: $1.8 million
Judge Judy Sheindlen's annual salary: $45 million

I would like to apologize to all my female readers, I don't mean to use such complicated math here, but it's pretty clear that $45 million is more than 1.8 million, but you should look past that issue and see that we clearly have something wrong with our capitalistic system and free market when the person who looks over court cases of complete morons gets paid more than people who are eventually going to be faced with trying to over turned

We may all be awaiting her judgment on the case of Grumpy neighbor v. 14 year old minority child.

I have to say Fuck the supreme court. With no more barriers to direct corporate donations to presidential campaigns, presidents are gonna earn mo money for their campaign from corporate sponsors on a daily basis than all those people combined. Sure they don't make as much but the benefits are great. All expense paid duck hunting trips with Dick Cheney and Exxon executives.

But before you think I'll cry out Death to America, let's look at this from an outside perspective. Judge Judy deserves it more than the current Supreme Court. We should actually put Judge Judy on the supreme court. Judge Judy is actually correct in her judgments and is entertaining. I suspect if she was on the supreme court and got on people like she did on her show, our country would be a lot better.

Clearly her services are much more valuable than the supreme court. Judge Judy is a huge liberal and was disgusted that prop 8 passed. Can't say the same for the current supreme court. Fuck them. Besides that, Judge Judy would not take any of Scalias shit. She wouldn't let anyone interrupt her because she is always louder than anyone who steps into the court room. Some one raise her voice to her and she would go EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME I AM TALKING, I AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM TALKING, I AAAAAAAAAAAAAAM TALKINGGGGGGGG. That'll shut up anyone trying to derail this shit.

What other reasons are there that she would rock?
-supports gay marriage
-supports stem cell research
-she's pro-choice
-supports the patriot act
-opposes legalizing marijuana
-voted for Obama

Okay, Okay.. so she's not VERY liberal, but she's liberal, she's like an Obama liberal but that's why you have judge Greg Mathis and Joe Brown to push the socialist agenda we want. Just no more white male supreme court judges, please..

One day that I had off and I went to visit my now retired father, he was watching Judge Judy and felt that watching the shoe was much more important than talking or spending any time with me. So it's clear that if she was on the supreme court, a lot more people would be open to actually giving a fuck about the issues in our world today.

Judge Judy would own corporations like she owned the cell phone scammer and call them idiots and berate them for like an hour or more. You think she'll be lenient on the issues? Pfft, she usually judges people on other factors. Like those times where there's really no evidence but she's already made up her mind and mocks them for 7 minutes before making a judgment for the plaintiff. Again, you can predict it like afternoon rain in Florida. "Excuse me! Don't interrupt me! EXCUSE ME. EXCUSE ME. EXCUSE ME!!!!: Judgment for the plaintiff.

Though I guess it may not always work. You really haven't seen Judge Judy till you've seen an episode in which she has made up her mind in favor o one party because the other came in dressed like trash or wouldn't spit out their gum. If you wanted to prevent that, the supreme court justice should make $10 billion a year so they can't be motivated by business interest.
"Yeah, try and by me off, fucktard, I'm already loaded!" - Clarence Thomas.
If Judge Judy, Judge Greg Mathis and Judge Joe Brown were the supreme court then America would be a utopia. In fact, I would gladly have Scalia and Thomas paid $45 million a year to get off the supreme court and settle tenant disputes on cable.

If the supreme court judges made a giant amount of money their decisions would become biased in favor of their business interest, I suppose. They would issue rulings on certain cases that have such broad scope that it would be very hard to say when a conflict of interest was happening. Maybe it's better that you pay the public servants a living wage and nothing more. You probably shouldn't use the patronage system. We should restrict the fuck out of lobbying and campaign finance. Record everything, make it available to everyone.

There's some good in government. Me saying that right now is a rare instance. Judge Judy is the only judge left we can trust.

Thinks about it. Judge Judy is binding arbitration that the parties enter into, so much like the Supreme Court, you cannot appeal Judge Judy's rulings to any highr court. Judge Judy IS the Supreme Court.

Now this is just a perfect way to end this:

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