Osama Sighed As He Drew His Katana...

Osama Sighed As He Drew His Katana...

You take a dash of Jack Bauer and add in a cup of Book of Eli. Whisk and toss in Some Kung Fu: The Legend Continues and you have a taste of what this next story is about. You see, there's no other way to describe the following news piece other than that. For you see, anArmed US 'Bin Laden hunter' is held in Pakistan

An American man who claimed to have been on a mission to hunt down Osama Bin Laden has been arrested in northern Pakistan, police say.

They said that 52-year-old Gary Brooks Faulkner, from California, was detained in the mountains of Chitral district - just north of Peshawar.

He had a pistol, dagger and a sword and was carrying Christian literature.

Police say the man was stopped near the border with Afghanistan's Nuristan province, a known Taliban stronghold.

They say that Mr Faulkner told investigators after his arrest late on Sunday that he was on a solo mission to kill Osama Bin Laden.

"We initially laughed when he told us that he wanted to kill Osama Bin Laden," police spokesman Mumtaz Ahmad Khan told the AP news agency.

But he said that police suspicions grew when officers seized the pistol, the sword and night-vision equipment.

Mr Faulkner is now being questioned by intelligence officials in Peshawar, the main city in north-western Pakistan.

He has told police he visited Pakistan seven times, and this was his third trip to Chitral.

Police say that Mr Faulkner was also carrying a book containing Christian verses and teachings.

When asked if he felt that he had a chance of tracing Bin Laden, Faulkner replied, "God is with me, and I am confident I will be successful in killing him", Mr Khan told AP.

The US embassy in Pakistan confirmed that a US citizen had been arrested and the embassy was seeking access to him.

Correspondents say that the Chitral area is widely seen as having escaped much of the violence that has blighted the rest of north-west Pakistan.

In April a Greek man who worked in one of the few museums in the area was released by the Taliban after being held by them for eight months.

Bin Laden has evaded a huge US effort to capture him since the 9/11 attacks in the US.

Chitral - because of its close proximity to Nuristan - is considered to be one of his possible hiding places.

Look, if hunting someone with a pistol and a Katana is wrong, then I don't want to be right. Bless this white Christian warrior, perhaps if there were more folks like him in the world we wouldn't be living in the shadow of Muslim oppression



This dude is way off target though. Osama is in a secret bunker lounging with his feet up on a foot rest under 1600 Pennsylvania Ave, Washington D.C., USA. Or maybe he's in some nondescript building on the naval observatory grounds. Or, you know.. Osama Bin Laden has been dead for years.

I liked this part of the article

"At first we thought he was mentally deranged".... "Then we found out he was American"

Americans are human cartoons. This should be the final proof that Americans watch too much violent TV and senseless action films. Okay, maybe I'm wrong there. American TV compared to some other countries like Russia isn't so much 'Violent' as much as it is fascist will-to-power nonsense.

But maybe this guy has a good goal. Just think about it, the only guy looking for Bin Laden foiled. They really should have sent him on his way, maybe given him some body armor for his trouble and wished him the best of luck. You know he's going to need it. He's doing more with his life than any of us. He has a quest! By mocking this christian soldier it only proves how hollow my own life is.



The sword is the best thing about this. What kind of fucking idiot believe he can take down Osama with anything less than Hanzo steel? Fucking idiot Americans. How do I know it wasn't a Hanzo steel? He would never have been taken into custody if it had been...

They should release him and let him continue the hunt with the addition of a cameraman and make it into a summer reality TV show. They should also pitch it to Al-Jazeera with a laugh track. It'll do great in all markets. Think of the DVD sales! All this guy needs is a bullwhip and a sidekick and he'd be his own Hollywood blockbuster.

I do hope they'll release him. It will be nice to see some worthless American scum get their head chopped off on Youtube. It's been so long....

Please, PLEASE say it was this guy;


I know, I know. This is all a little mean. Let's all make fun of the mentally ill, why not. But think of it this way - A mentally ill man has resources to pursue his fantasies, is stopped from removing his genes from the pool. It's pretty clear what we have here - Afghani nanny state.

Considering the best intelligence agencies in the world operating with seemingly limitless funding and all the top notch technology there is can't find him, why the hell not just let this guy go make a fool out of himself? I think they were scared he might actually succeed where America has failed. We all know that America needs its dialysis machine boogey man to continue this war, it's not like we found gold in them there hills.. Oh wait.



But this act of courage by the mentally unstable isn't all that strange. American filibusters have been adventuring in the third world since the birth of the nation. I guess I'm just surprised there's any left now to do this. You know, given the general wealth, ability to travel, and access to firearms the modern American has should be infrequent. They just join the Army/XE/Blackwater instead now and get to use better and cooler weapons.

Perhaps we should be reminded that Afghanistan literally offered Osama Bin Laden to us and we refused because we wanted him turned over unconditionally (the condition was we stop bombing their civilians once he was captured)

Oh, don't believe me? Need some evidence? Shut the fuck up.