Much like a broken clock is right twice a day, 4:20 happens both in the AM and PM. So why the hell not, let's go with pictures this time..
You know what he's doing in the oval office right now..
I love old pulp comics. God damn that's awesome. But not as awesome as these next posters for a show that got really bad..
Though I guess it's the pin-up art that is what I like about them the most.
And of course, this dude has to be on some weed..
But you know, we can't forget the other big thing that 4/20 means.. It's Hitler's Birthday!
But seriously, we when speak of evil on 4/20, we should look past Hitler and just look at what else happened today, on this glorious day of ambiguous pot origins and look to where we always look for evil - Florida. Because I do need some weed to get through the CNN live stream of Zimmerman's lawyer making statements about the case. Because really, that shit needs some highly medicated aid to get through. It's just great that they're trying to spin this as some sort of police incompetence in not gathering all this Exonerating Evidence somehow.
[Updated at 10:58 a.m. ET] The prosecuting attorney is now questioning Zimmerman. He asked whether Zimmerman had ever said he was sorry when he spoke to police. Zimmerman responded that he had told one of the investigators that "I felt sorry for the family."
The prosecutor told Zimmerman that if that's true, it must have been recorded. He asked Zimmerman if he was sure, and Zimmerman said he was "fairly certain."
[Updated at 10:55 a.m. ET] "I wanted to say I am sorry for the loss of your son," Zimmerman said on the stand, apparently addressing Martin's parents, who are in the room. (Watch video of apology)
Zimmerman also said he thought Martin was older than he was, and that he "didn't know if (Martin) was armed or not."
[Updated at 10:54 a.m. ET] Zimmerman is about the address the court. His attorney has called him to the stand.
Again... he said "I'm sorry for the loss of your son, I didn't know how old he was, thought he was younger than me and I didn't know if he was armed or not". That's literally the full thing he said. In one god damn sentence. God damn I need another bowl.
How does that even come close to justify shooting someone. I dunno.. didn't know the dude was armed or not, my bad! Welp, sorry I killed your son.. thought he might be a lil younger than me.. you know how it goes.
How could you say that in public to the mother of the child you lynched while she is in the same room? How exactly does your brain make you do that - or for that matter allow you to do it? I'm sorry for the loss of your son. How you lost your son, we will not discuss..
Say what you will about Hitler, at least he made the trains run on time..
So the biggest stink out of Coachella wasn't that Radiohead played and rocked out, as I have heard the bootleg tape of at least three times already. But apparently the biggest shit was that Tupac came back from the dead...
Well, in holographic form. Which I guess is as close to a reality as you'll ever get to Tupac coming back from the dead.
Though with everyone henning and hawing, has anyone thought to mention yet that it's actually a volumetric projection not a hologram. You actually have to have the physical object to make a hologram and at the moment, they haven't reanimated Tupac's corpse yet - But that's also because it'll take till 2095 before Tupac will rise from the grave. For now he's just chillin in Serbia.
But let's pretend that he's actually dead and this is the closes you'll get, how the fuck did they think "You mang, let's make a holographic version of Tupac!"?
I love that. I mean.. it's only fitting that I actually post my favorite Tupac video to post on my blog whenever someone dies.
I think at this point I owe a lot of royalties on that shit now. If anything, those two videos sort of show that rappers these days are all a bunch of fucking pussy ass bitches when compared to those who were actually hard core in the day. And even them.. what the fuck is Ice Cube and Ice T doing these days... yeah, that's what I thought.
It does raise an interesting question - What happens after you die with your likeness? I'm sure as shit going to make sure that my last will and testament reads: No Holograms. I mean, can you really picture that sort of shit? "Imagine our low prices. It's easy if you try!" -Undead John Lennon, licensed spokesgram for Wal-Mart.
Where will Tupac show up next? You to can book Tupac to sing at your wedding and barmitzah!
I'm just waiting for the Supreme court ruling. March 2014 - In a 5-4 decision, the Supreme Court today sided with the Westboro Baptist Church in ruling that the dead had no Constitutional expectation of privacy and their holographic images could legally be projected outside their own funerals loudly decrying "their own God-damned faggot loving ways that caused their deserved deaths".
Then again, while death is certain, it's never a free pass to making sure your likeness will not be selling terrible shit anyway as it has been done with in the past
So really, it shouldn't be a surprise when Tupac is headlining tours with that digital anime chick over at staples center..
Just look at that hologram anime dancer. It's going to be real "cool" when anatomically impossible 3D simulacrae become the new beauty standard for women..
Any how. Here's a random picture of him in Ghost Busters. HAHAHAHAHHA. get it..
Okay, I'm bored with this topic now as I'm sure you are as well. Maybe I'm just projecting...
So now that frothy ass juice and cum has dropped out of the race, not to take away anything away from Ron Paul and Newt, but it seems that it's very clearly going to be a battle between Obama and Romney come November.
And by battle I mean a clean sweep. Because, really. This isn't a fight. It's like seeing a fan favorite wrestler fight some no name dude. You know the deck is stacked against him and Obama can't possibly lose this bitch.
But even with the victory pretty much in the bag with mr. awful at economics President, Obama did something that confused me. He released a terrible ad the other day, pointing out that Romney's accusation that he is, in fact, not a foaming-at-the-mouth fascist.. and this shit is slanderous none sense!
All I took away from that ad is this:
"Nobel Peace Prize winner Barack H. Obama might not be a complete fucking asshole," said mitt romney
"that's not true. i am a complete asshole" responded Nobel Peace Prize winner Barack H. Obama
But hey, it's cool that Obama has cut out the pretense and is now campaigning directly to the republican base. I mean, you can't really be too surprised by it. You know, those folks who otherwise you know as Americans.. you know, those who will be first against the wall.
Anyhow, the media is doing its darnedest to make Mitt look like, you know.. a Human We swear, he's human!
MITT ROMNEY IS HUMAN WE SWEAR
In a new campaign video, Mitt Romney's wife Ann regales the American people with heartwarming tales of what a fun-loving scamp the Presidential hopeful can be when he's roughhousing with their kids. In fact, she sighs, sometimes having Mittens around the house was a lot like having an extra kid. Inflating her mom credentials would make sense as a strategy if Ann Romney were running for America's Mommy-In-Chief, but since her husband is running for one of the most powerful positions in the world, perhaps rebranding him as a Steinbeckian ManBoy isn't the most politically salient idea.
I have to say, "Mitt Romney is like a son to his wife" sure doesn't sound creepy as shit at all.. I mean, I swear, it sounds totally normal...
Or maybe we should respect Romney for putting Kink in the public sphere in a rational and open way. If that's what he and his wife are into, it's not good to, you know, Kinkshame them or anything.
And the pranks — oh, the pranks! Mitt would wrestle and roughhouse and sling balls hither and tither. And there Ann would be, standing in an apron on the front stoop, crossing her arms and reminding herself that soon, five of her six children would grow up and leave the house, leaving her with her permanent child. Her forever-child. The one she married.
Damn girl. Why you gotta be so mean?
I know this may sound a bit off topic, but most of the fluff pieces I've read on Ann Romney really focus on her being maternal. Like the story about her making Mitt's favorite meatloaf or how he is her child and so on and such on and so forth. Opposed to how Michelle Obama was portrayed as a business woman and what not. Just thought I would point that out.
Anyhow, the big picture to focus on that is that Mitt likes Meatloaf. Yes, clearly he's a normal person like you and me. Why yes, I would do anything for America, but I won't do that.. No sir. Not meatloaf.
Man, I have to admit, that's the recipe he likes? Surprise Surprise. It's literally the most boring meatloaf recipe you probably will ever see. Not even the creativity to do like the 70/30 beef/pork mix or go really wild and throw down with some lamb. Let us not mention the sauce.
Weak sauce, indeed. Her pinterest also apparently lists recipes for red white and blue cupcakes and red white and blue punch. My god, their taste are pretty damn dull at the Romney table. But it's pretty clear that they're trying to frame her as an All-American Mom. And all of the buzzing you hear is a million different dog whistles going off and subtly nodding to a policy position Mitt is trying to sell himself on.
Because really, do people in the waste lands of America really put crumbled up potato chips on their tuna casserole? Do they actually make Tuna casserole itself? That seems like something either a 5 year old left home alone for a week and on the verge of starvation or someone who's completely given up on life would put together.
But anyhow, now that the Republican slobber knocker is done, Mitt Romney can begin to show that he cares about women...
(CNN) - Mitt Romney, eager to close the persistent gender gap opening up between himself and President Nobel Peace Prize Winner Barack H. Obama, has begun using an eyebrow-raising statistic on the campaign trail. "Did you know that of all the jobs lost during the Obama years, 92.3% are women? During the Obama years. Women have suffered." Romney told a crowd Tuesday in Pennsylvania.
He made the claim again Wednesday in an interview on Fox News, saying "Over 92% of the jobs lost under his president were lost by women. His polices have been really a war on women."
Women of the United States, I care about you. My mother was a woman. - Willard Romney
My god, I've never seen a more transparent politician. I've seen better actors on Sci-fi original movies.
But the thing that makes me the angriest about all this is how one of the things these two idiots, both Obama and Romney, will argue about will be who cares about women more. But then neither actually, you know, does anything about it... Or even mean what they say.
We're literally living in a country where paying women equally as men is a controversial issue that isn't worth touching.
So when I was renewing my drivers license once my birthday came up, I realized I could get a personalized license plate. Then it got me thinking what other places had personalized license plates. The first place that popped up was Texas.
The following is just a bit of fun with all of it..
Not to fear, I'm pretty sure that there's plenty of ways to get across that your white power affiliation through state - sponsored means. They don't do things small, deep in the heart of Los Grandes Yermos DeMierda
Hell's to the yeah, man. The Electronic Entertainment Expo RULEZ! Oh wait. no. I mean Goatse...
Welp, looks like I'm going to have to get a new personalized license plate or something.
Back in 2006, contrary to conventional wisdom, many financial professionals were well aware of the subprime bubble, and that the trajectory of home prices was unsustainable. However, because there was no way to know just when it would pop, few if any dared to bet against the herd (those who did, and did so early despite all odds, made greater than 100-1 returns). Fast forward to today, when the most comparable to subprime, cheap credit-induced bubble, is that of student loans (for extended literature on why the non-dischargeable student loan bubble will "create a generation of wage slavery" read this and much of the easily accessible literature on the topic elsewhere) which have now surpassed $1 trillion in notional. Yet oddly enough, just like in the case of the subprime bubble, so in the ongoing expansion of the credit bubble manifested in this case by student loans, we have an early warning that the party is almost over, coming from the most unexpected of sources: JPMorgan.
[.......]
And with all private players stepping out very actively, it only leaves the government, with its extensive system of 'checks and balances', to hand out loans to America's ever more destitute students, with the reckless abandon of a Wells Fargo NINJA-specialized loan officer in 2005. What will be hilarious in 2014, when taxpayers are fuming at the latest multi-trillion bailout, now that we know that $270 billion in student loans are at least 30 days delinquent which can only have one very sad ending, is that the government will have no evil banker scapegoats to blame loose lending standards on. And why would they: after all it is this administration's sworn Keynesian duty to make every student a debt slave in perpetuity, but only after they buy a lifetime supply of iPads. Then again by 2014 we will have far greater problems (and for most in the administration, it will be "someone else's problem").
For now, our advice - just do what Jamie Dimon is doing: duck and hide for cover.
Oh, and if there is a cheap student loan synthetic short out there, which has the same upside potential as the ABX did in late 2006, please advise.
Welp, what do you know. 270 billion dollars in loans that are at least 30 days past due? I know a few people who have tens of thousands of dollars in student loans, graduate students can now no longer defer repayment on their loans and they have uncapped interest rates all thanks to Obama.
So basically they're fucked. To be honest, their game plan seems like a solid one. In that they plan on instead of paying it back, they're just going to finish their education and then leave the country. Again, that sounds pretty solid of a plan.
The only other viable option for those who are in massive student loan debt is to never try to repay it and just take the wage garnishment until they retire, as garnishment is capped at 25% of take home income... Well, as defined as gross income minus fed poverty line. But I guess the response to that would be to dramatically raise the garnishment cap. Just imagine, Doctors and teachers and engineers eating cat food to survive.. oh wait, teachers wouldn't even have enough cash to afford that cat food.
A lot of the people stuck in this mess don't even really know how much they owe and have lost track of all this shit as the loans have been handed off between so many different organizations at this point and have wide ranges of interest rates. But yeah, maybe it'll get to the point like the health billing in America, where the actual value of what you owe gets so detached from reality that if you so much as imply you're willing to pay off some part of your loans, they'll stop bothering you. Which sounds like a good thing in a really perverted way.
I mean, it's already a situation where they made it so that it ignores bankruptcy forever. So try getting out of that student loan that way, I dare you. Now maybe I'm just a simple, old-fashioned country lumber baron's suite, but it still strikes me as odd that these groups refer to finance options as "products".
Student loans are pretty much robbery in my mind. It's the signifying way that capitalism keeps the poor under-educated and poor. The fact that you have to pay thousands upon thousands of dollars just to learn. More people should read massive amounts of books. And fuck text books, it's all about E-books. Pirate all books. Textbooks, fiction, nonfiction, everything. Just pirate it all.
Because God is capitalism, the fruit of knowledge is education and Satan is communism - that provides free education to all. And in this case, Satan is correct. Satan is always correct. ALL HAIL SATAN!
Because seriously, if you think most of these people will ever make enough to pay off their student loans, ha! Good fuckin' luck with that bullshit. They may as well just waive student loan debt. At least that would do more to stimulate the economy and job growth than anything since WW2.
Till that happens, perhaps you shouldn't get anymore student loans. In fact, make sure you don't have anyone cosign your loans with you. It's just a mistake no matter what way you look at it. Besides that, it makes it a little trickier to skip out of the country when your folks are going to lose their house if you do.
Once was a writer, tho, you see words to your left, so I guess I'm still that to some degree.
You can find my scribbles and mind ranting on this and various other places as a means to keep the creative, satirical and costco talk muscles worked out.
Was once apart of the tv industry, but I'm sure the NDA's are still in effect so let's move on from that. Now I spend my time slinging beer and keeping a building in one piece.
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