Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Cause I'm The Tax Man!

Cause I'm The Tax Man!

The downside to having your birthday before the 15th is that everyone is so wrapped up into figuring out the complex process of doing their taxes to even care. Let alone have any money to get you anything that doesn't come from the 99 cent store. Ok, let's be honest, I'm sure my birthday could be on FREE MONEY FOR EVERYONE DAY and I'll more than likely still not get a gift. That's how I roll, yo.

It doesn't help that the price of just about everything is going up. If you haven't noticed, your California sales tax went up from 8.25% to 9.25%
The $12.8 billion tax increase signed by Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger comes in the throes of the worst recession in a generation. It will cost more than $300 for every man, woman and child in California - $1,200 taken from the discretionary spending of an average family of four - either in direct tax increases or in tax-driven price increases as businesses pass along their costs to consumers.

Set aside all the ideological arguments about taxes: simply as a practical matter, Gov. Schwarzenegger has just made the state's budget woes - and its economy - significantly worse.

On June 28, 1991, the California Assembly began debate on what was then the biggest tax increase in California's history: a $7 billion tax hike pushed by Gov. Pete Wilson that included increases in sales, income and vehicle taxes.

If there's a bright side to this, at least now coming up with a tip is going to be a little easier. And you queers who keep tipping only 10%, come on. I know times are tough but now all you have to do is double your tax and you have some basics to giving your waiter a livable tip.

Clearly tensions are running wild. It's not good to have uncle sam pick your pockets all year long in your paycheck, let alone have it come time for the bill to see if you've paid over what you should or if you still owe. It's a crap shoot and well, it generally sucks

But there's a revolution brewin', but it ain't tea that's on the stove. No sir, places all over the good ol' US of A are gonna show that a day in which you get money back from the Gubmint ain't good enough. No no, this is a day in which places all over the country are going to get out into gathering spots of mass consumerism and really stick it to Obama administration and hopes to achieve it's goal of...


stop paying taxes, I guess.

These folks are pretty silly to begin with. Who the fuck calls themselves Tea baggers? With a name like that you're just asking for no one to take you seriously. Taxes may suck, but after living my entire adult life in the Bush administration, this is the first time I am NOT ashamed of my country.

I can only imagine what these folks think like "I can't believe obama is going to raise my taxes from $323 to $341 - that's a whole $18 I could spend on a tax day t-shirt

RON PAUL 2012! "

Do these people realize that the taxes that we are paying this year were still Bush's plan. So I'm not sure where this hate for Obama is coming from. Oh yeah, morons. My bad. This is honestly one of the dumbest things I've ever seen. Let's protest Obama's tax cuts and raises that haven't even been implemented yet! How dare Obama not fix everything in three months. Change, my ass.

Even if you were going to harp on what Obama hasn't done and should focus on the shit Obama has personally done (not getting rid of warrantless wiretapping, allowing Republicans to barter about releasing Bush torture memos, not going far enough with stimulus and bank nationalization, etc) I'd be fine with these protests/things. It would be freedom of speech in some productive manner. This though, is pretty fuckin' stupid petty shit.

Pick up a history book, my dear. We've done far worse.

Here's a reminder folks that this is a protest over raising the top income tax bracket from 36% to 39%, a level that was in place just 8 short years ago, and a level far below what it was at for the vast majority of the 20th century, by a portion of the population who will almost entirely be outside of the affected tax bracket, and that this is unironically being touted as a similar justification for revolution as the conditions that sparked off the American revolution. In short, you protesters are fucking morons.

That's not even getting to the fact that this isn't even slightly original. Can't they come up with something original sounding? I get that they're pissed at the government, but it's a completely different issue from what was going on during the Boston Tea Party. Call it the Pork Party or at least be somewhat original, instead of trying to play on some odd nostalgia, attempting to turn modern-day neo-con mouthpieces into "patriots".

I suspect that many people tomorrow that will be protesting won't even know the historical background of the Boston Tea Party. Maybe I'll attend one of these with a cup of hot water. Free tea, yo. Better yet I'm going to disguise myself as an illegal alien and dump used general motors cars into the San Francisco Bay. At least that way it'll actually be accurate to the Boston tea party. That's what our founding fathers would've done. At least in the world of Glenn Beck.

I can see why the teabaggers want these days brought back; those striped stockings are SO slimming

I'm going to have some tea tomorrow. Probably Earl Grey. Don't think I'll be able to convince anyone to have a tea party with me though. But the mentality of thse fuckwads on taxes is the same on tea. Which is that no one in America gives a shit about tea. Which goes hand in hand with what they feel like towards their fellow American.
"I don't want to help everyone else if it costs me anything at all."
True patriotism right there.

I suppose since us democrats protested Bush nonstop for eight years, it's the republicans turn to have a day of fun cardboard sign making and poorly constructed chants. In the end, you should pay your god damn taxes though. Even if some of it is going to shitty bank bail out, there's still a lot of it going to road construction, social security and other medicare programs.

Sure, I wont steal the government. Perhaps some taxes should go to schools because a comma would change that completely.

This year I actually had someone else do my taxes. Something about a pile of freelance paychecks as well as my 20th century one really made it a confusing. Thankfully I got a call today that told me I'm getting a sizable refund. That's Hollywood accounting for you.

Perhaps with uncle Sam taking from your wallets, some interesting bit of news would be useful. Don't worry about your taxes because Robots Just Went Sentient.

Look at the cute little robot in the part!

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