Sunday, August 16, 2009

Ashes To Ashes Done Classy

Ashes To Ashes Done Classy

When we die we like to think that we'll go out in some sort of classy or fashionable way. You don't want your body to get used by some college medical students or your organs being used like a football. Nor do you like to think of the reality of the situation that your body will be nothing more than worm food. It will unless you decide to burn the whole thing up to a pile of ashes, that is.

I'm still not sure what I want done to my body. Part of me wants to become worm food. Be all that I can be in the whole circle of life. But the other part of me just wants to have a viking funeral. Put my body in a small boat, drench it with fuel and push it out to sea while it's going up in flames. Let my burnt ashes float away forever lost. I somewhat doubt I'll be ever well known. And even if I am, what's so wrong with just letting my friends, fans or loved ones just remember me in their thoughts?

Well, now you can remind those loved ones how exactly you looked. You see, even if you decide to go the route of getting turned into ashes, you can have all the fun of an open casket. These custom urns, made using facial reconstruction and 3D printing are now available!

Talk about creepy. It would be like opening the eyes of the person in the casket to make it seem like they're looking at you and are still alive. Only you're not still alive. Just think of the implications. You no longer need a nice looking vase or urn to put up on the mantle. You can have a 3D face of the person who died reminding you of their absence for decades after they die!

To me it sounds a bit morbid. I suppose if they made those sing like the hanging Billy Bob Fish, they'd really have something going for them.

♫here's a little song i wrote...♫

I suppose the best part of the these is site advertises that they can use an image of the deceased or a favorite celebrity. I know who I'm getting, Britney, Bitch! I mean, why wouldn't you want to put your ashes into the head of one of your favorite celebrities. It's not like you'll be around when the celebrity hits bottom and is doing reality shows on VH1 to pay the rent, right?

I suppose it is a better method of storing the ashes of the loved ones. I mean, it has to be better than putting it in the fridge with a label of "DO NOT EAT", right?

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