Monday, January 12, 2009

Happy D-Day

Happy D-Day

How did you celebrate D-day? I'm not talking about the day we took to the beaches and kicked some Nazi ass. I'm talking about the day you dumped that excess baggage and filed for a divorce. I have never had the distinct pleasure of being married and thus, never had the chance to file divorce papers to anyone ever. But if I do ever find myself in the position of getting a divorce I suppose January would be a good month to do it. Seems that everyone else is, why not I?

This report from The First Wives World shows that divorce is on a rise during this time of year and for good reason.

It has long been known that January is the month that most people divorce. With that in mind, lawyers in London actually picked a specific date for D-Day — as in, divorce day: The first Monday after children return to school. In England, that will be January 12th.

In the U.S., according to some experts, divorce filings will see a dramatic spike this week — the first full week of January.

Why wait until January vs earlier?

Logic is that no one wants to ruin a child's Christmas and if you divorce over the holidays, the holidays will then be always associated with a traumatic event.

Although some in the U.S. believe that the crumbling economy and falling housing prices will delay divorces, a lawyer in England thinks otherwise.

"Many are concerned that divorcing when house prices are plummeting means they’ll lose a great deal of money from what they view as an inevitable sale, says Shelley Hesford, a solicitor in Cheshire who spoke with the London Telegraph. So instead of waiting for prices to rise, which could take years, some couples will opt to cut their losses sooner vs. later. The estimate is that every 10 percent drop in housing prices leads to a 4 percent rise in divorce.

Tight money over the holidays may reinforce that thinking.

In addition to sticking it out over the holidays for the sake of the children, there are other factors contributing to early January being D-Day time:

• Lawyers and counselors take vacations over the holidays, courts are closed, and couples can’t file for divorce.
• Northern winters are bleak, especially after Christmas; forced togetherness indoors drives couples nuts.
• One more pair of gloves for Christmas was the final straw.
• Holiday partying led to a drunken holiday flirtation... with someone else.
• You made a New Years resolution not to have another holiday with him.
• The hangover was bad, but not as bad as facing that first breakfast of the new year with someone you no longer love.

Another candidate for record numbers of decisions to get divorced: we say January 20, after the three-day Martin Luther King Jr. weekend. By that time, children have gotten back into the rhythm of school and life; they have their friends around them, so that a family breakup is less jarring.

One positive fact: appointments for marriage counselors also go up in January, meaning that some couples decide to work on their relationship, and not give up – yet. The other top times for filing for divorce are at the end of the school year, and at the end of summer vacation.

What is important is that, if and when you decide the marriage is over, telling the childrenmust be done carefully, whether they are preschoolers, or teenagers.

While most people resolve to lose weight for the new year, it turns out that for others the weight to be lost is that of an unfulfilling marriage.

The whole peak after MLK day is a bit odd. But if you think about it for a second it's perfectly clear. Many people have a dream and that dream does not include being with that loser anymore. No such morbid item that you could get gunned down from any balcony on any given day. Might as well make the most out of the time you have on this third rock from the sun.

On the other hand of things I'm wondering if you didn't wait too long to pull the trigger. It's already 2009, you're in another tax cycle. So you're stuck with filing with them in your taxes because you didn't dump their ass before the 31st. Way to go. Guess water does seek its own level, now doesn't it, loser!

I'll let it slide this once. I get what these folks are trying to do. They're trying to start the new year off right by not breaking those resolutions. That is, to not sleep with that cheating/worthless/changed person this year. So dump them off and get the new year started off right with someone new... all at the same time as not hurting the kids feelings. Well, best of luck to you. I'm sort of tempted to get married myself so I can take part of this next year. I mean.. it sure sounds like fun!

Then there's always that classic joke which I've never really seemed to get but I always fake that chuckle whenever I do hear it "Why does divorce cost so much? Cause it's worth it." Maybe one day I'll get it... Maybe one day indeed.

No comments: