Monday, November 17, 2008

The Beautiful People, The Beautiful People

The Beautiful People, The Beautiful People

Fake tits and plastic surgery is one thing that most link to this great (currently) smoky city of Los Angeles. The glitz and glamor is very often attached to the palm trees and Hollywood image. You would think that with all the L.A. 9's and 10's as the gold standard in image that the look had to be bought. You'd be surprised as to where the most cosmetic surgery is taking place in America but first, I have a confession to make.

It's seriously like an infomercial with the "SIX-PACK ABS IN DAYS!" promises

I have come to a shocking conclusion that I look forward to my issue of Men's Health more than I do my subscription of Maxim. Maybe something is broken about me. As I get older my health concerns are different than when I was young. And when you were young you could eat anything without any ill effect. Five chili cheese burgers before drowning it down a couple of cold ones? No problem! When you're older you can't do that without feeling it in the morning. I used to drink 2-liters of soda a day. Now I shutter to think of such things.

He actually has a shirt on? Wow. That's a first

So with my every growing priorities of keeping myself in a condition that is not dead, Maxim's SpikeTV-frat-like format doesn't age well. So I find myself flipping through Men's Health a lot more. I can honestly say it's for the articles.

While Maxim has tits and ass that is good eye candy, Men's Health is full of information that I can actually use. What I should be eating. What ab work out I will try to and fail to complete after a week and the ever so often sex related articles. It's the best of all worlds.

The compromise to not picking up Maxim's eye candy is to grab an issue of Women's Health. Besides having women in great shape on the cover, they often have informative tidbits like this one, which has their source came from the old saying of "If you don't use it, you lose it" Thanks women's health, I'll make sure I don't lose it anytime soon. Reporting at its finest.

The Map of cutting, sucking and tucking

With that off my back let's get back to the main point.....
It seems that the stereotype that Los Angeles is full of fake and upgraded women may need to get a face lift as this Map in Men's Health shows what location performs the most cosmetic surgery. Surprise, surprise. It's not Los Angeles. In fact Los Angeles ranks #48 on the list.

Even more shocking is that San Francisco is #1. Perhaps the old song needs to be updated. Not only did you leave your heart but also your excess liposuction fat, double chin and A cups in San Francisco. An area full of people that go green and only use organic are the highest numbers in improving themselves with saline instead of yoga and botox instead of granola.

Hurry up, I have to go to a prop 8 protest in an hour

Maybe plastic bags where banned there because enough of a carbon footprint was being made by the plastic breast they produced. Silicon Valley takes on a new meaning entirely. Perhaps Nip/Tuck went to the wrong city.

Or maybe they're just getting it cheaper elsewhere. Much like how I roll into a baseball game or a bar with a few drinks in me already so that I don't have to spend that much on the over priced drinks inside. Maybe everyone is getting their plastic surgery elsewhere and then coming to Los Angeles after with their discount nose jobs and tummy tucks to show off.

Nurse, I said to prep them
Not put them on you!

Perhaps we're starting to see a backlash of the "perfect look" and being enhanced doesn't cut it. I know I always hear a backlash of reaction when a photo spread on a magazine is obviously airbrushed beyond the point of believability. To be honest, whenever I see a magazine cover with an over airbrushed or photoshopped model on the cover I really don't care much.

This ain't no MS Paint project!

All the girls who can be in those magazines have to have nice bodies and facial structure so that they're palatable to the biggest number of eyes. They end up being kind of unmemorable, blank kind of attractive, the only girls I remember are interesting-pretty. It's a special unique look. Like a piercing in a perfect spot or hair color or cut that is stylish but unique. Freckles always help.

Women don't have to have Double D breast that defy gravity to be eye candy. A certain look that is perfectly special and all their own. I'm glad for this study as it shows that maybe, just maybe, there's those here that are perfectly fine to use a little elbow grease to lose whatever weight they have that they don't like, tone up what they feel isn't tone and work with what they have without having to go under the knife. L.A. is a huge place with a lot of places to work out at. Hiking in the mountains or swimming and biking at the beach. There's always a place to work out. Just not while this smoke is in the air.

Soak it in L.A., today we find out that we aren't as shallow as everyone thinks we are. We have some self control when it comes to injecting cosmetic surgery items into our system. Today we can walk with our chin up and not have to worry about it being doubled or wrinkled.

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