Then And Now

Then And Now

As proof that I can write for Jay Leno before he's replaced by Conan next year, here's some Jay Leno style comparisons to compare this coming depression 2.0 with the O.G. one from back in 1929.

1929: desperate unemployed men sold apples on street corners for money
2008: desperate unemployed men sold Apples on street corners for money
(good time to get a great deal on used iPods)

1929: distraught wall street assholes commit suicide by like jumping off high ledges
2008: distraught wall street assholes commit suicide like the Joker Heath Ledger (drug overdose)



1929: nobody had any food
2008: only those people in africa who cares

1929: massive suffering leads to widespread participation in nationalist "Wars of Colonization"
2008: massive suffering leads to widespread participation in nationalist "Wars of Warcraft"



1929: obese white men lost lot of weight
2008: obese white men lost their animes

1929: Hundreds of thousands of people starved during the Dust Bowl.
2008: Hundreds of thousands of people starved during the Super Bowl.



1929: Businessmen jump out of windows after losing their shirts
2008: The federal government bails them out at the cost of possible hyperinflation

1932: The Republican brand tarnished by economic woes and beaten by charismatic Liberal Democrat in election by citing positive change.
2008: The Republican brand tarnished by economic woes and beaten by charismatic Liberal Democrat in election by citing positive change.



1929: massive migration from the Midwest to California
2008: massive migration from California to the Midwest (house gets repossessed)

1929: children screaming because they haven't eaten in days
2008: children screaming because their parents had to downgrade from roadrunner high-speed online



1929: John McCain loses his teddy bear as a result of economic panic
2008: John McCain loses the election as a result of economic panic
(you see, he's old)

1929: Americans learn to survive by cooking what little they can get from local farmers and charities
2008: Americans learn to survive by cooking corn