Friday, June 12, 2009

The Twilight Support Group For Men

The Twilight Support Group For Men

Does a support group for men who had to sit and watch Twilight because of their girlfriends exist? I know a lot of guys will be dragged out by their wife, girlfriend or person they are dating. It can lead to a lot of problems like heavy drinking.

If one doesn't exist, I would like to create one. I hear that AA gets a lot of funding to keep it going. I'm pretty sure I can make a good amount off it. Then again, the amount made would only come second to actually being able to help any man who had to sit through Twilight because of their girlfriend.

Now that it's out on DVD, I think the threat of this film is ten fold based on the fact that your gal can pop it into the DVD player at any given moment and surprise you with it. No longer can you call in a bomb threat to the theater nor can you just eat a lot of Mexican food before the showing so that you're stuck in the bathroom with your DS. She can and will pause the DVD till you come out of hiding.

Just remember, sometimes divorce is the only option.

I was lucky that I didn't HAVE to watch this. At least not in it raw form. But considering I had to sit through it to know how to deal with it so I would know how to help those who did have to, I went with the alternative and watched this as a Rifftrax. It was worth the pain I went through to be able to hear people make fun of it. So I had my own support group while watching it.

Care to see how the quality of the colored commentary of the Rifftrax is, click this sentence.

I never thought I would watch Twilight. Not unless I was forced to with the threat of not getting any sex or anything, but that rifftrax nearly killed me because I was laughing so long. I expected this to be great, given how bad the regular film is, but the rifftrax version makes this one of the funniest movies out there. It transcends bad to worse and goes back to completely funny. Then again, the moment you turn off the rifftrack it becomes a steaming pile of glittery shit.

I mean, it probably was one of the worst directed, worst shot and worst edited movies I've seen in years without the commentary. Anyone who even thinks about watching a vampire movie should just go see Let The Right One In. At least before the American remake comes out. Now that's a

I mean, seriously, NOTHING HAPPENS IN THIS MOVIE! The conflict isn't even introduced till the last 30 minutes. Besides, Edward is like 107 years old. What does he see in Bella? No matter how old she lives to be, he's always going to have 90 years of wisdom on her. Why does he still have the mind of a teenager? Most of all, why is he still going to school? If I lived that long I would not be repeating the same grade over and over again.

What was up with the skin? I know vampire lure changes over time but sunlight turns your skin shinny? The book describes him as looking like his skin is covered in tiny diamonds when in sunlight. This was about as not-retarded as they could possibly make that look, but really it's retarded in general to have a vampire turn into fucking sparkles when in sunlight.

I don't really understand WHY so many female fans of this think that this is anything a man could watch. It's like telling them to play with Bratz. If anything else ever needed a support group, it would be this. Especially with the sequel coming out down the line. I mean, look at this shit

It looks like a stinker. But as you can see from this news story, it's not only the movie that stinks.

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