Stupid Things Overheard At The Holidays
Since the Holidays have pretty much all wrapped up by now (even you Kwanzaa) I'm sure that you've just lived through a lot of stupid things said by your family. Oh, I know how difficult it can be, Your family must say some really dumb things sometimes. So instead of allowing it to cause you to drink, perhaps you should first talk about the things... namely the stupid things you heard from the mouth of your lineage before you drown them out with alcohol. New Years already happened, so you have no excuse now for the excess drinking.
So here's a couple of stupid shit overheard over the Holiday season by the morons you love visiting just once a year anyway;
- Tupac aint Dead
- Lieberman is such a douchebag.
- Aunt who supports Israel because it's predicted by the bible to be one of the last steps before the 2nd coming.
-Atlas Shrugged is really an eye opening book..
(at this point I just disowned them as family members)
-Old people talk about the nice negro that used to work for them... Teeth like snow, they had.
- A couple of people complaining about people saying Happy Holidays and being PC instead of Merry Christmas. When it's mentioned that "some people don't celebrate Christmas, they celebrate other holidays", the only response heard was "That's cuz they're retarded." Nope, no arguing with that.
-My little cousin will explain to me again how we're all going to be nuked/go to hell because we elected obama (a black socialist) president
-Uncle will be a militant catholic right-winger and talk about glenn beck/rush limbaugh and make disparaging remarks about women on the left
- My sister makes some very random comment that makes her sound like she's stoned and/or pissed and will follow up that awkward comment with a "am I right?".
- Someone has to have a relative that's exactly like Clint Eastwood in Gran Torino
- Someone turned on the Jeff Dunham show.. which caused me to just go somewhere to cry.
- People asking/inquiring if I have a drinking problem when others give me drinking related gifts. The real problem here is that people don't know how to shop for me.
So perhaps you should post your favorite Dad/Mom/Family-in-law/Reaganomics follower/Creationist thing said over the Holiday season that made you just wonder if you were really adopted in the comment section. Only together can we cope in our elite ivory tower.