COSTCO - HOLD THE ONIONS

COSTCO - HOLD THE ONIONS

I wrote a piece not too long ago about how Costco was changing up the food menu in their food court by removing the option of a polish hotdog and tossing in a lot of strange new additions. Well, one thing I didn't realize is that all over the U.S., the bigger tragedy that isn't being reported on is happening.

Costco is removing the onion dispenser.

Just think of the scenario. You just plopped down your buck and half to get your hot dog and cup for soda and go over to the condiment section and the classic triangle metal onion dispenser is gone. No crank that barely worked and you often wondered if it was empty to turn. Nothing. You're just there left with a deli mustard, relish covered hot dog with no goddamn onions to speak of.

I feel like I've lost a dear friend. I mean, sure, it always seemed empty. So it's not much of a change, but not having the option anymore... now that's just cold blooded, Costco. 

Sure, you'll still be able to make yourself an adult hot dog and ask for some sauerkraut... that being said, the sauerkraut is given to you cold. But it's a buck and a half for your hot dog and soda needs, so you can't really complain. Also, you could just take the soda cup and fill it with onions and take that home.

Never have to buy onions anymore or waste time dicing them once you learned that life hack. Yeah, I bet you didn't read that one on the interwebs. Just remember, that onions are chock full of folic acid and that's just the best way to scare away any social interactions with anyone ever by having a cup full of onions to work with.

So why are all these changes happening? Well, it's a result of shareholders and not the corporation as a whole. Which I guess does make it easier to take that Costco isn't betraying you. It's those evil shareholders trying to save, like, a few hundred dollars. Some fear that the days of a $1.50 hot dog are going to be long gone. What will Costco be then? I don't know and I'm afraid to find out.

One option would be to do the onions like they do the kruat, put it in little plastic containers so at the very least you can enjoy good old fashion onion filled hot dog. Even if it's an outrageously wasteful action and they should just bring back the dispensers. I thought we were in America.

Then again, I'm guessing that those dispensers must have been a real pain in the ass to clean. And if they do offer them in prepackaged onion packs, then it probably just cuts down on waste in the form of onions going bad sitting out in the open air in a metal container. I guess the sky isn't falling after all and all will be right in the Costco Kirkland world.