YOUR ANNUAL REMINDER THAT BABY IT'S COLD OUTSIDE IS PRETTY RAPEY

YOUR ANNUAL REMINDER THAT BABY IT'S COLD OUTSIDE IS PRETTY RAPEY 

Hi there, you know me. It's your average guy who ruins everything by pointing out the obvious reality that, well, that shit was probably bad, but because it's so rooted in your nostalgia that you never really noticed or questioned how bad it actually was. You know, it's what keeps Civil War Confederate statues standing and racism alive and well in America.

Just dropping the annual reminder that the timeless Christmas song Baby it's cold outside is pretty fucking rapey. Yeah, it's also really nostalgic and I often play it a dozen times during this Holiday season, but let's just accept that it's fucking creepy as all hell and in a day of #Metoo and #Timesup, folks are going to be upset that you point out that the song is basically some creepy as fuck dude trying to get a lady friend to stay and Netflix and Chill while she goes through the list of excuses, as one probably had to do to be polite in turning down such advances without ending up with a slit through and the bottom of a lake. But you know what, she's basically saying "NO, NO nOOOOOOOOooOo  fucking NOOOO, OOOKay, fuck it. If it takes 2 minutes of being unsatisfied by your stupid needs then fine!"

The sentiment is still the same that she tries to use every fucking excuse as to why she can't stay and his only fucking reason and rationale to her staying and bumping uglies is that it's goddamn cold outside. Hey asshole, lend her a jacket? Anyhow. Yeah, it's pretty rapey. It's fucking rapey as all hell and man, if it didn't have that mellow singing and nice Christmas tones, you'll just realize the fact that it's goddamn wrong and someone should have said something back then - only, those vintage values clearly were all about not giving a fuck about what the woman wanted.

Yet, as bad as it may seem, there's one way you can make it even fucking worse. How, you ask? Let me just show you...



Who's fucking bright idea was it to just say  "Man, this song is getting a lot of shit from those politically correct folks who think that a woman's inability to get out of an uncomfortable sexual predator situation seems to ruin our Christmas music, I know, LET'S ADD CHILDREN!" Cause, you know, adding children basically means that they can't be asking for sex cause they don't know what that even is, EL OH EL.

"But Javier, what about Santa Baby or I saw mommy kissing Santa Clause?"  A.) I'm Jewish, Schmuck! B.) Both those songs have the female clearly giving consent. So fuck off. Just realize that the song has its flaws. It's as if you were defending a song about hanging minorities because it has a catchy beat. Look, listen it, enjoy it, but perhaps you should be reminded that Baby it's cold outside is rapey. Embrace it. Know it. Just deal with the reality of it.